My Life hasn't been the same

[cparob]

I have had a troubled childhood, being all alone, difficult to make friends, bullied through school but I was determined cos when I left school I have changed a lot. Now the problem is I find it difficult now to get close to girls to talk to or get close with. I have had girlfriends in the past but when we break up, the next one is harder getting close to. Is there something wrong with me? I have ben to the counselor which helped a bit, but I needed something else. I have have tried medication which helped a bit as well. But I am still not myself and I don'y know what to do. I can't socialise as I could, and I always want to be left alone in case I am an embarrassment.

Help?

[Aldo]

The fact you know you have a problem helps. Maybe you didn't take enough time to get over your previous girlfriend when you try to enter a new relationship. You are just insecure and shy. Not suprising from your bullying at school.

Some of us feel lonely at times. I feel lonely a lot, and find it hard to make friends sometimes. Some of the things you need to do I guess if you want to make friends is ACCEPT the invites to do things. Do you accept or tend to decline? Making friends is always difficult. What to say? How to keep conversation going etc. I have trouble at times, you just need to try to find a common ground and then bleed it to dry!

One step at a time, until you feel more socially confident. I was very shy until I was about 16...still am a bit. Just grew more confident and started to like myself more.

take care.

[primalsurfer]

Sounds similar to my childhood, I was bullied right up until I left high school for university, the biggest problems being my bullies always seemed to move on to the same schools I did.

University was the best thing for me though, the people seemed alot more grown up, i made some really good friends and became more confident in myself.

It still affects me though, I find it extremely difficult to walk into a room of people I don't know.

Another thing that has helped me is chatting online, you don't have to worry about any of the problems associated with face to face meetings and you're in comfortable/familiar surroundings, one tip don't make up anything be yourself your true self. You can make online friends and practice socialising that way, when you are ready you can maybe meet some of them, you then ahve the advantage of already knowing the people you are meeting and they know you.

good luck