Eating

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Eating

Postby Millenia » Thu Jan 07, 2010 1:41 pm

Hey guys,

Firstly im going to say something positive, just to let you all know i have me exams coming up for my nursing and i think im doing really well so far and im enjoying it to the full.

My problem is that on my new placement, i didn't realize that it is helping people with eating disorders. I know some people might not find that a huge deal but im finding it very hard to 'face my demons' so to speak when it's right in front of me.
Since i started there, i haven't been eating as much and i've been doing 5 mile walks in the snow, it's like almost missing it in a weird way. When i look at the people who have issues with eating and they tell me what they do in order to keep the weight off, it's like a blast through the past for me. I remember the things i used to do, not nice thing's to keep the weight off.

I know most of the people im working with at the moment are very very ill, and i wish i could speak to them about how it can get better but i feel that i can't. I don't want to say the thing's people said to me as it just made me more determined not to do anything.

My head's in a bit of a mess at the moment.
I don't want to talk to my teacher about it as they might look down on me and i might not be able to finish my placement. I've already took 2 days off due to migraines, i think im just freaking out about it too much.

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Re: Eating

Postby Bel Bel » Thu Jan 07, 2010 3:43 pm

This is really hard but I can't see your teacher looking down on you if she has choosen this type of field to work in

I think it would be best if you told her this is having a negative effect and ask if it would be possible to move elsewhere

I am so pleased you feel you are doing well otherwise

Please try to take care of yourself, I assume it was a struggle to get to where you were before you started facing the demons again, try to pull yourself back now before you go too deep and then possibly ruin your chances at being succesful


Sorry I can't suggest anything more useful
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Re: Eating

Postby snail » Thu Jan 07, 2010 4:15 pm

I agree, can you not change your placement if you really feel this may harm your health?

The positive side is, it does at least show you clearly that you aren't perfectly over this problem yourself. I've noticed myself how hard it is to be around people who have the same sort of problems that I used to have, but perhaps this is an opportunity to do some more work towards getting better? After all, if you can face this situation, seeing yourself in others without it pulling you back down, you need never fear these demons again. But only if you think you're up to it.
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Re: Eating

Postby Millenia » Thu Jan 07, 2010 5:08 pm

It's really hard to explain, like i don't think i'll ever be 'cured' so to speak but keep myself into a medium where im not thinking about food everyday, which i thought i found.
I try to stay away from people who are too obsessed over food as it's too easy to fall back into something like that.

The problem with telling my teacher at my placement is that then they will have to contact my university and then they will ask me why i never told them about my problem then they will have to by law make me go through a mental health check and another physical check.

It's scary to think that they won't let me continue my course.

I do want to help these people and learn from my placement, i just didn't think i would be facing eating disorders so soon. Maybe i should just put up and deal with it, and see what happens.

Confused :cry:

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Re: Eating

Postby snail » Thu Jan 07, 2010 6:31 pm

Hopefully you will be cured one day :) These things take a long time to build up, it makes sense that they take a long time to recover from.

But if you're not up to this right now, then that's the way it is. You need to take care of yourself.

Millenia wrote:The problem with telling my teacher at my placement is that then they will have to contact my university and then they will ask me why i never told them about my problem then they will have to by law make me go through a mental health check and another physical check.


Do you have to admit to previously having an eating disorder? Is there no way you can just say that this placement isn't working for you?
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Re: Eating

Postby Millenia » Thu Jan 07, 2010 7:19 pm

there's so many students that it would take a few weeks in order to change placements so they won;t look to kindly upon it :cry:
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Re: Eating

Postby Bel Bel » Fri Jan 08, 2010 10:41 am

How long will you have to be working in this particular area?
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Re: Eating

Postby Millenia » Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:40 pm

Im in there for 3 weeks.
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Re: Eating

Postby Bel Bel » Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:48 pm

So there is an end to it pretty soon
Try to be really strong then and keep coming to us for support
We don't want you to get unwell :(
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Re: Eating

Postby ToriL87 » Mon Jan 11, 2010 5:54 pm

I agree with Bel Bel, if you can put up with it for 3 weeks then it would be a testament to how far you've come in your own recovery, i know it will be hard at times, but it's a big step recognising that these girls are ill. Maybe you've been placed her for a reason, and you could think of these 3 weeks as a challenge, whilst it might be tempted to fall back into your own ways, the evidence of how bad that kind of life is for you is all around you at the moment. Think of this placement as like closing that chapter of your life. You don't want to be one of those girls, your taking positive steps and moving on with your life.
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