Page 1 of 1

I have nothing to say... :(

PostPosted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 3:21 pm
by rufio89

I've been thinking about this a lot since my boyfriend and I split up.

I have nothing to say to people. I find it SO hard to think of something to say. I dont think I'm shy exactly, but I worry that what I think about wont be interesting to other people so when Im talking to people I sit there thinking "god, what can I say? I dont have anything interesting to say" and then I get myself so wound up about it that I cant think of ANYTHING at ALL to say, not even something I think is boring!

It's really starting to bother me. I think it's related to my mood. When I'm REALLY happy, Im much more talkative. I find it easier to talk to people, and the same when I'm drinking, I have no problems making convsersations with people.

I used to spend a lot of time on the phone to my sister and to my friends and I've found that lately I dont know what to say to them either. What's the matter with me? It's making me feel incredibly boring, and the more I worry about it, the worse it gets.

I dont know if maybe I need to think of some "stock" conversations, so if I run out of things to say, I can go back to a default one.

Why have I got so boring???

At the moment, the only times I'm having good conversations with people are when I'm upset and I talk about what's upsetting me, or when I'm super-excited and I can talk about the thing I'm excited about.

Re: I have nothing to say... :(

PostPosted: Tue Mar 08, 2011 11:42 am
by roselilly
It maybe that you have a little depression, when I suffered a few years ago I found also that I felt as if I had nothing to say to people, a lot of people thought I was being rude and miserable :( , it felt as if I couldn’t be bothered to talk.

Re: I have nothing to say... :(

PostPosted: Tue Mar 08, 2011 11:16 pm
by Pichu
I think we all meet this problem, specially when we meet new people. The only thing I can advise you is to think a long time before of what you can say to engage a conversation. Banal sentences you can use easily. I guess that by the time, it will become easier to reach out to others.
Once you succeed in engaging a conversation, well... remember a conversation is between two people. Reacts on what the other is saying and don't be afraid to expose your point of vue.

For your sister, don't be afraid. It's normal. I mean, you said you talked a long time with her by phone. When everything is said by phone, it becomes harder to create an interesting conversation. But don't hesitate to talk about the news to engage a debate!

Re: I have nothing to say... :(

PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2011 10:39 am
by snail
I agree with Rose, I feel sure you're just a little depressed and emotionally exhausted at the moment. It will pass, try not to stress about it.

Re: I have nothing to say... :(

PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2011 10:46 am
by rufio89
I dont feel depressed I dont think, but it has given me some food for thought.

I have thought recently (and this goes back actually a little further than the breakup) that I feel quite DAMAGED. There's some stuff from my past which I thought I'd dealt with and lately I've started to feel like maybe I just buried it and it's starting to resurface. I think it's making me hyper-aware of "what sort of person am I?" "how have these things affected me" and it's making me react strangely to situations.

I thought about possibly getting back in touch with a counsellor, but I'm not sure as I didnt really find it helpful last time and I cant really afford it at the moment. I think I just need someone to talk to, but it's stuff that I feel is a little too intimate (I dont mean like sexually, just emotionally) to discuss with my friends and family.

I just hate feeling like I'm boring. When we first split up, and I had all the adrenaline, everyone was commenting on how vibrant I was and how fun and interesting I seemed, but now that's worn off, I just feel boring and insecure. I'm spending a huge amount of time on how I look, much more than I ever have before, and still feeling like I look worse.

Re: I have nothing to say... :(

PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2011 7:20 pm
by SpongebobClaire
just so you know you're not alone. i feel like that all of the time. maybe counselling would help you. or even just ranting to this board might. i think the others are right when they said depression. i find i'm at my worst in social situations when i'm feeling the slightest bit down.

i'm sure after a good ol' rant and a good hard look at yourself in the mirror, you'll realise you are just like everyone else. dealing with the same old problems as everyone else. you will be fine, i'm sure. you're just going through a little rough patch with yourself. as we all do from time to time. keep ya chin up :)