I can't cope

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I can't cope

Postby highlandcow » Tue Jun 26, 2012 6:00 pm

I don't want to sound melodramatic but I'm starting to feel I can't cope with the way my life is heading.

I've been crying all day (yes, at work) with no signs of stopping.

My relationship has ended, so I've lost the person I'm closest to and the only person I could tell everything to. This isn't the first serious relationship I've had, but it was far and away the most meaningful and I have this image of myself getting older and older with no one special in my life.
Because of this, I've been feeling very emotional and aggressive, which could threaten my job, as I know I'm not performing very well.
I'm still not eating well, and when I've been crying for a long time, I get physically sick.
Most of my friends have been supportive, but my best friend seems to really get a buzz out of rubbing her new relationship in my face (she invites her boyfriend along where ever she goes and then doesn't talk to me, just snuggles with him)
Most of my family live quite far away, not easy for weekend trips.

I've got a counselling session in 2 weeks, but I'm not sure I can wait too much longer.

I'm not going to do anything stupid, but I'm finding things so hard that I don't feel like I can struggle any more.
Go to Glasgow at least once in your life and have a roll and square sliced sausage and a cup of tea. When you feel the tea coursing over your spice-singed tongue, you'll know what I mean when I say:
'It's good to be alive!'"

- Billy Connolly
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Re: I can't cope

Postby Skarlet » Tue Jun 26, 2012 6:29 pm

Oh HLC, I have a couple of suggestions which might or might not be helpful. I think you need to go and see your doctor. Explain how you are feeling and say that you aren't coping at work and ask to be signed off. Then go and see your family, at least for a little while. To give yourself the time and support to get over this.

On the part of whether you will find someone else who you will be as close with, that will come in time I promise.. Don't allow yourself to get caught in the cycle that he is the only one for you. We all have many possible loves and he isn't the only one for you.

*hugs*
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Re: I can't cope

Postby Bel Bel » Wed Jun 27, 2012 3:58 pm

I agree with Skarlet.

Also if this is love it's rubbish. He doesn't even know if he wants you from one minute to the next.

Honestly it won't feel like it now but you have had a lucky escape.

You will get better but you have to grieve and part of that is letting go. No more texting or talking to him.

I know this sounds cruel but I am glad you are crying like this it means you are starting to accept it's over and you will now have to go through that greiving process which will include an anger stage.

If you can't get signed off can you go to your family for the weekend at least?

You WILL cope, you are strong and this man will not reduce you to nothing. Don't give him that power over you. He is not special or he would not treat you so callously. You are vibrant, pretty (I've seen your pic on here) and have a lovely personality. You just have to grieve, it's normal.

I can't get the smiley hug up but consider yourself cuddled to the point where you can barely breath.
Life is for living so live it to the fullest

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Re: I can't cope

Postby snail » Wed Jun 27, 2012 5:28 pm

:grouphug:

There you go, Bel (and HLC :) ).
How we spend our days is how we spend our lives.

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Re: I can't cope

Postby highlandcow » Wed Jun 27, 2012 9:08 pm

Bel Bel wrote:I know this sounds cruel but I am glad you are crying like this it means you are starting to accept it's over and you will now have to go through that greiving process which will include an anger stage.


Thanks Bel, I know you're not trying to be cruel. Underneath all the weeping I do know that it means I'm finally coming to terms with it. I just that I don't want to come to terms with it, I don't want this to be in a situation where I need to come to terms with it. But I guess I'm not the one who made this decision so I need to cop on and accept it. It's just so hard, I've never felt so wretched in all my life, and in the midst of it all I'm quite annoyed that he's reduced me to this. ](*,)

Bel Bel wrote:If you can't get signed off can you go to your family for the weekend at least?


I'm away up to the doctors next week, and then it's my counselling session on the 10th July so hopefully that will help. I can't get any holiday at the moment, but I'm going to my aunt's for the weekend soon as she doesn't live far away. I'm looking forward to that.

Bel Bel wrote:I can't get the smiley hug up but consider yourself cuddled to the point where you can barely breath.


Thank you. I nearly cried on the train when I read that on my phone. Honestly, can't take myself anywhere! :roll:
Go to Glasgow at least once in your life and have a roll and square sliced sausage and a cup of tea. When you feel the tea coursing over your spice-singed tongue, you'll know what I mean when I say:
'It's good to be alive!'"

- Billy Connolly
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Re: I can't cope

Postby rufio89 » Wed Jun 27, 2012 9:58 pm

Ohh I'm sending you so many hugs HLC, it WILL get better, it's just so rubbish for this bit, I really feel for you xxxxxxxxxx
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Re: I can't cope

Postby highlandcow » Thu Jun 28, 2012 8:39 pm

rufio89 wrote:Ohh I'm sending you so many hugs HLC, it WILL get better, it's just so rubbish for this bit, I really feel for you xxxxxxxxxx


Thanks Ruth, that's really sweet.

I'm feeling a tiny bit better today. I've just come back from boxing, which really helped.

I'm still really missing him though. I hope my counselling session comes round quickly.
Go to Glasgow at least once in your life and have a roll and square sliced sausage and a cup of tea. When you feel the tea coursing over your spice-singed tongue, you'll know what I mean when I say:
'It's good to be alive!'"

- Billy Connolly
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