I can't live without him!

For problems with mental or emotional well being.
Forum rules
NEW USERS HAVE TO WAIT FOR THEIR FIRST POSTS TO BE APPROVED BY AN ADMINISTRATOR. Rules | Essential Information | FAQ | Support | Twitter

I can't live without him!

Postby X_Smiler_X » Sun Mar 23, 2003 12:09 pm

You have probably seen me typing to you all about my boyfriend before, but this time it's the very end..
He finished with me on Friday evening, because I wouldn't have sex with him - we'd been going out for a year and 4 months, and all of a sudden it's "lack of sex".
He said I wasn't giving him what he wants, and he feels we are drifting apart because of it.
I'm really upset, I can't get over him - I wake up with him on my mind, and go to sleep with him on my mind. Please Please help me.. :roll:
Smile at life, and life will smile back at you.
User avatar
X_Smiler_X
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
 
Posts: 1279
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2003 4:47 pm
Location: South East England

Postby Aldo » Sun Mar 23, 2003 9:54 pm

Forget about him!! If he cant seem to understand that a relationship can hold without sex he aint worth keeping. Your right in not having sex with him when your not ready.

Just think how much of an a*s he is!
If you dont ask you will never know
User avatar
Aldo
Familiar Face
Familiar Face
 
Posts: 124
Joined: Sat Jul 27, 2002 3:13 pm
Location: male, 23, Scotland, Glasgow

Postby X_Smiler_X » Sun Mar 23, 2003 10:52 pm

Hi Aldo,
Thank you for giving me advice, but I really can't express to you how much I love him. We'd been together for 2 and a half years - I'd fallen for him in a big way, nothing seemed to be wrong between us.
You know, he got up, went to leave, then came back crying saying he couldn't leave me...2 minutes later, he said it wasn't going to work out, said he loves me, and left....I'm so confused.
Smile at life, and life will smile back at you.
User avatar
X_Smiler_X
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
 
Posts: 1279
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2003 4:47 pm
Location: South East England

Postby Sunshine » Sun Mar 23, 2003 11:23 pm

Im just out of a similar relationship just over a month ago. It is really hard the first couple of weeks, especially as he has given you such mixed signals (which my ex also did to me). I had also been going out with my ex for 2years and I loved him so much, but I had to move on otherwise I would still be waiting for him to sort his head out! He is mucking you around and you deserve better than that. You need to get out, have fun, flirt with other guys if you feel like it. I know that it is a the most horrible feeling, but take it from me, you will move on. I still love my ex, but now I realise that it would never have worked out, we both would have ended up miserable, so breaking up was for the best. You are going to be ok whatever happens. Dont wait around for him no matter how much you love him and listen to me when I tell you, it is NOT YOUR FAULT that he had a problem with you not wanting sex. As Aldo said, you were quite right not to have sex when you are not ready, and he is not worth being with if he cannot recognise that. Please dont blame yourself, it really is not your fault. If you want to talk about it Im here, coz I know how hard it is at first, especially after so long. Chin up hun, you will feel better soon, and you will find a guy that respects and loves you in time.

Luv Sunshine
x x x x x x x x
User avatar
Sunshine
Regular Visitor
Regular Visitor
 
Posts: 19
Joined: Sun Jan 05, 2003 10:02 pm
Location: Scotland

Postby X_Smiler_X » Mon Mar 24, 2003 11:31 am

Thanks for your advice hun. I need so much of it at the moment.
He's still sending me text messages saying "You will always have a place in my heart, baby" and "I can't get over you, I dont think I ever will. Miss you loads you know?"
I'm just so confused, But deep down I know that I can't get back with him, because if he can't understand that I'm not ready for sex, then I'm not ready to commit myself to him.
This is really really hard, as he is forever saying we could never work out again, and we'd be best as just friends.
I miss him more than anything. :cry:
Smile at life, and life will smile back at you.
User avatar
X_Smiler_X
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
 
Posts: 1279
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2003 4:47 pm
Location: South East England

Postby Sunshine » Mon Mar 24, 2003 6:35 pm

I know u miss him hun, it is a shame that things have worked out the way they have. Well done for being able to realise that you cant commit to him when he cant understand you not being ready for sex! That is a big step, I blamed myself for our sex problems and have only just realised that if he had been more understanding there wouldnt have been a problem! So well done for that hun! I know wot u mean about the txt msg's too, I got that from my ex aswell, in the end I stopped replying and although it was hard, it was the best thing I could have done because he stopped texting me and it gave me time out to start trying to get over him. You need some time out too, to get your head around what has happened and to allow yourself to adjust. Once you have done that you will be able to salvage some sort of a friendship if it is what you want. Maybe you could text him and just say that you need a little time and you will contact him again when you are ready? I hope you are ok.

Luv Sunshine
x x x x x x x x
User avatar
Sunshine
Regular Visitor
Regular Visitor
 
Posts: 19
Joined: Sun Jan 05, 2003 10:02 pm
Location: Scotland

Postby X_Smiler_X » Tue Mar 25, 2003 11:23 am

Just a quick message to say I am slowely but surely getting over him, I'm gonna miss him like hell, but I know I have to move on.
He text me asking if he could come and see me, just as a friend, but I think the hurt will just return if we start seeing eachother, even as friends.

Thanks Sunshine, the advice you have given me is great XXX
Smile at life, and life will smile back at you.
User avatar
X_Smiler_X
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
 
Posts: 1279
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2003 4:47 pm
Location: South East England

Postby Sunshine » Tue Mar 25, 2003 2:18 pm

Glad to hear you are feeling a bit better. It will get easier as time goes on. Hope you find happiness wiv sum1 who will understand and respect you coz u deserve better than ur ex was able to give.

All the best, Sunshine
x x x x x x x x x x x x x
User avatar
Sunshine
Regular Visitor
Regular Visitor
 
Posts: 19
Joined: Sun Jan 05, 2003 10:02 pm
Location: Scotland


Return to Mental wellbeing

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests

cron