I'm violent

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I'm violent

Postby ghostuponthefloor » Tue May 16, 2006 10:39 pm

I'm a gothic so obviously i'm different and i get bullied a lot because i'm very short, i used to ignore the bullies thinking they would go away but they never did, so i started to get violent. Ii once tried to strangle a girl when she said too much and i'm afraid of what i could do if i snap, can this be cured?

i have tried counting to ten, it irritates me further
Yours sincerely and still breathing
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Postby PurePurple » Wed May 17, 2006 7:40 am

My friend is a goth and we get bothered a lot. So what she tends to do is 'hammer' or 'clamp' them. Basically its where you contradict them so they dont know what to say next. I find it works since i did it to about 5 people at once :roll:



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Postby Rogue » Wed May 17, 2006 9:55 am

Oh, honey, being bullied is horrible. I got bullied at school too, because I'd moved from Scotland and had a funny accent.
You're probably feeling violent because you feel like you don't have any other way to stop them. I know I'm not a violent person, but there have been times when a person is being so horrible and so unreasonable that I have to physically stop myself from smacking them because I want to do anything to shut them up.
What you need is another way to 'fight back' without violence. First of all, you need to build up your self-confidence. I guess you're ok with being a goth. How do you feel about your height? Does being short bother you? If your comfortable with it and you let them know that they might get bored because they're not having an effect on you. So, if they tease you about being short just say "Yes, I am. How very observent of you."
This worked for me with my accent. They just got confused when they teased me about being scottish so I agreed with them. I am Scottish. As insults go it wasn't very imaginative :D .
If you feel good and confident about yourself I'm sure you won't feel as powerless and think of violence is your only defense.

Hope that helps a bit.
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Postby Rock_Queen » Wed May 17, 2006 8:24 pm

Hey,

I'm classed as a "goth, jitter, emo, etc..." by many people, and yeah, at first it was annoying and intruding, and i did feel very trapped as to how to cope with it. But violence really isn't the answer, at all. If you smack someone then you'll get their friends onto you, and lets face it, in school (are you in school?) you're a sitting duck, i am too!

You have to keep your head low, and endure everything, they'll get bored and go away, it works for me. I've seen people get angry over it, and it may scare then for a short while, they'll only end up wanting a dramatic response like that again, so don't even give them the bother of getting angry. Just laugh and think "ahh well at least i have a sense of self!"

One thing i use which really confuses them is when they say "goffick! lolol" at me i just turn round, as stony faced and uninterested as i can be, and go "and?..."
This embarresses them because i'm not reacting to how they want, they want you to scream and yell and cry, don't give them the satisfaction. Simple as :)
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Postby ghostuponthefloor » Wed May 17, 2006 9:19 pm

thank you very much for your comments i do know that violence isn't the answer but when this thing inside your head goes 'snap' it'd hard to control.

i will try to take all of your comments to heart, thank you all for your help
Yours sincerely and still breathing
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Postby Liquidius » Fri May 19, 2006 6:55 pm

I fit into "goth, emo.." whatever name they wanna class me as. And it can be so annoying. Just remember, most of the people saying it are so narrow minded, and are missing out.
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Postby Laurajane » Fri May 26, 2006 6:36 pm

yeah this anger needs to be channelled somewhere else because it can be really destructive, is there anyone you can talk to?
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Postby Mr.L » Tue Jun 06, 2006 11:52 am

ive been challenged because of my hair etc. A kid threw a rock at me cos i was wearing a clash t-shirt. I dont wear band shirts a lot or anything im more of a topman, h&m guy lol but i love the music.

Best thing to do is well it depends on the circumstance. Im not trying to be a bad influence but if they hit you id hit back. As i have done. Or as xxPurplexx said Hammer. Contradicting a lot of them is quite easy as the majority are smart as bricks. I dont like fighting myself but i was recently on my way to a party and well some 'chavs' to stereotype threw chicken at me. I was like oi dont do that respect your elders you *****. Maybe i was asking for it but yer i got into a fight and it got mental. I came out with a broken lip but i felt good. I dont want to endorse violence but sometimes because its the only thing they understand it works.
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Postby ghostuponthefloor » Mon Jul 17, 2006 11:49 pm

thank you every one.

Kinda makes me wish i hadn't taken martial arts! :lol:
Yours sincerely and still breathing
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Bullying

Postby Redshift » Tue Jul 18, 2006 4:16 pm

Hi,

I know how you feel mate, I definetly do!, I get bullied at school by people in all classes people jusge me even before they know me, I alwasy want to hit people but I try to refrain, Most people now knopw how to annoy me and they do!! I try to shrug it off but some time you do click and then bam your hitting the person.
I know how you feel mate try talking to your mates, just tell them not to do anything about it unless you want them t help you of course.

Try to be yourself and normal and just shrug everything off or contradict them or twist there words.

Hope this helps
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Postby ghostuponthefloor » Tue Jul 18, 2006 10:43 pm

redshift,
thanks for all your help, i think we can all agree that those little 'clicks' in the back of your mind can be very dangerous.

thank you all for your help, i'll just try to bear with it for now
Yours sincerely and still breathing
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Postby morris mouse » Wed Jul 26, 2006 8:26 pm

Rogue wrote:If you feel good and confident about yourself I'm sure you won't feel as powerless and think of violence is your only defense.


"ghostuponthefloor"

Yes,this can be cured,but ONLY if you do your part.

I can understand,that,being a "Goth" would cause you to feel,and be treated by some,as different.
But,having said that,no-one wants a bully,therefore,
just because you get unwanted attention,doesn't give you the excuse
to be one. :-? :-?

I agree with "Rogue"
If you work more on building up your "self-esteem",you wouldn't feel so negative inside and,therefore, you would feel more positive,and,you
wouldn't think of violence as your only defence.
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