My Life Has Fallen Down IN Front Of Me

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My Life Has Fallen Down IN Front Of Me

Postby Redshift » Wed Aug 15, 2007 6:56 pm

Um.....I have......don't know what to say....I have skin cancer, My life has just calapsed around me, My parent don't know yet, the only person that know is my girlfriend and after the shock of it well, she threatened to kill me, which did not help the situation, I know she won't but she just burst into tears,

I don't know what to do, I have just recovered from my injury's after falling down stairs and now look whats happened, I am not worried about myself, and the shock still hasn't hit home yet, but the one thing I worry about is how I am going to hurt everyone around me, I don't know what my girlfriend to go though losing someone again, she has already lost her parents to divorce, I don't want to leave my family or anything like that,

The doctors have said it is a serious version of the cancer and they are running test at present to find out what stage it is in,

I am really worried about everyone, but myself, Due to finding out about it I have also come across, depression, now and I am can't deal with any kind of issue or problem that comes my way,

All I have been doing for the past 3 days is praying with my girlfriend, and spending time with her every second I got I am spending with my family or friends, just I don't know how long it will take for my mum and dad to work it all out,

I am lost and don't know what courner to turn at the moment and I am falling to pieces,

Guys just cheer me up

thanks
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Postby chosenfew » Thu Aug 16, 2007 12:44 pm

i know words will never make you feel better and i dont know whats your going through at all so advise i give is probabaly easier said than done in your mind. I really think you should tell your parents, they can help you through this horrible stage in your life, you dont have to go through this alone. imagine not telling them and something happenes to you and they find out you have known for so long. can you imagine how upset they would be?? Hopefully the doctors will be able to get to this before it gets to you. i know a few people who have had cancer and they have had it removed so there is always that chance your family wont lose you.
What ever you do, please dont sit round being depressed, you need to enjoy your life and when the doctors give you the all clear after your op you will have been given another chance in life and thats nothing to be depressed about [-X sorry i cant make you feel any better about this situation or make you smile but i hope you can get through this.
can i just ask why your girlfriend threatened to kill you?
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Postby Redshift » Thu Aug 16, 2007 6:56 pm

because she has lost so many people in her life, she tried to explain when I asked her, and well she doesn't want to lose anyone else, and she just wants me to stay with her, but I dunno why she said it though I think because she was really really upset, or in shock or one of the 2 :-? but I understand,

My Parents will find out, soon, just need to find the right moment, but well, the skin cancer I have got is spreading across my body slowly, bit by bit, and well the only way to stop it is VIA kimo, (sorry can';t spell) or cutting out the infected parts, but the kimo is the only viable way,

I told today my other best friend and he well fainted when I told him, literately,

I will do my best to enjoy life, at the moment, and I am trying, the anti-depressants are working + the tranquilizers to make me sleep, but I still fond it hard to switch off, so many things not done,

If something happens, my girlfriend has been told to post on here,
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Postby Weasley » Fri Aug 17, 2007 10:43 am

Hi Redshift,

I know I can't offer much comfort to you but just thought I would post my feelings and advice.
I would most definitely tell your parents, as chosenfew said before, it will help you get through this - you need as much support as you can get. My aunty was diagnosed with breast cancer last year and it was heartbreaking to see her go through chemo and loose her hair, but she had her family there which helped keep her strong and positive. Everyday she would tell us "Cancer? What cancer?" She even had a laugh when picking out a bright red wig to wear. I don't know whether she was in denial or genuinley strong, but she never seemed to let it get to her. Behind closed doors I can only imagine what it was like for her - my cousins used to tell me how hard it was.
I know and understand your girlfriend is upset but she needs to be there for you now, help you stay positive and believe you can get through this. You can't do it on your own and other peoples positive attitudes will help you. It's amazing what they can do these days with getting rid of cancer - I'm sure with chemo (and I know it is a very difficult, emotionally and phsyically draining process) you will be in remission in no time.
Please, don't think the worst. I'm sure your girlfriend and friends are just in shock, it will sink in soon and I'm sure then they will try and help you as much as you can.
xxx :)
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Postby all_apologies » Fri Aug 17, 2007 1:22 pm

Am I right in saying that you're 16? I think it was highly unprofessional of your doctor to deliver that kind of news to such a young lad on his own. Also, to say it is a "serious form" of cancer is a bit vague, did you find out more about what sort it is? What kind of tests have they done, and have they not suggested having your parents or a close friend/relation with you? I honestly think it's ridiculous and can't believe your GP and oncologist have acted in this way. You need to let your parents know, because once you start chemo you'll be unable to look after yourself.

Where's the cancer situated? Survival rates in young people are very promising, so don't give up hope.
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Postby Pwif » Fri Aug 17, 2007 9:44 pm

Redshift wrote:Um.....I have......don't know what to say....I have skin cancer... My parent don't know yet, the only person that know is my girlfriend... she threatened to kill me.. I know she won't but she just burst into tears,

I have just recovered from my injury's after falling down stairs...

The doctors have said it is a serious version of the cancer and they are running test at present to find out what stage it is in,

the skin cancer I have got is spreading across my body slowly, bit by bit, and well the only way to stop it is VIA kimo.. or cutting out the infected parts, but the kimo is the only viable way,

.. the anti-depressants are working + the tranquilizers to make me sleep...
If something happens, my girlfriend has been told to post on here,

Redshift,

I am really struggling. I can not believe that any doctor/consultant would tell a 16 year old boy that he has serious cancer (of any sort), without involving his parents, and working out a treatment plan. I know you are very upset, and your girlfriend (who is only 15?) is also very upset. However, I do not know of anyone your age who has such a terrible cancer. When is the doctor going to give you a more detailed diagnosis? Has he asked your parents to come along too? This is far too much for a lad of 16 to cope with. Please involve your parents. They will be better placed to help you in practical terms than people you don't know on PP.

Wait until you have a more detailed analysis of your 'condition' from your doctor before you think about worrying.

I hope things work out well.
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