I hate the way I look

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I hate the way I look

Postby Avril » Mon Sep 01, 2003 9:53 am

Hey. I've just turned 14, I am 5"7', size 8, & weigh almost 8 stone!

I look awful. I have huge legs, a huge bum & a huge belly!

I hate the way I look.

I wish I was thinner and don't know how. I try and try not to eat anything at all. I go a while but then my mum will have made us dinner us something. I try to make excuses but end up having some.

I also exercise quite alot. It drives me really mad & fustrated that i never seem to lose wieght or look better/flatter!

Do ne of u have ne ideas for me to lose weight?

Thanks,

Avril xxx
I'm startin to trip, I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone.
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Postby tammybligh » Mon Sep 01, 2003 12:19 pm

To be honest, from the description you've given I very much doubt that you have a fat anything!! If anything, you're underweight for your height.

Try not to be concerned about the way you look. At 14 you're body will probably continue to change for about another 4 or 5 years....

Please don't try to stop eating - it's really bad for you and will result in you getting ill, which nobody wants. The best thing you can do is to make sure you're eating healthily and doing regular exercise. Cut out the bad stuff in your diet ie cakes, chocolate, crisps (anything with a lot of fat). If you don't lose weight then it's probably because you don't need to.

To get your belly flat, the best thing to try is sit ups - these will work out your abdomen. I personally use an ab trainer which makes them slightly easier to do. I think they cost about £10 and you can get them anywhere.

I don't really want to give advice on working out, as I'm unsure about what is safe and what isn't at your age. It's been a while since I was 14 :-({|=

If anyone could help out with this.....please do.
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Postby sovs » Mon Sep 01, 2003 2:29 pm

When i was your age i thought i was fat,and i was a size 12 (wish i was now lol).
I think your mind plays tricks on you, as i always used to look in the mirror and think yuk. When my friends complemented me i didnt know why they were saying i looked thin. Now when i look at pics of back then i think WOW was i sexy! Although now ive had a baby im more like a size 18 egh.
But now matter what your size you can still look good and flattering.

Sovs :wink:
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Postby si » Mon Sep 01, 2003 8:07 pm

have u asked any of your friends what they really think, u have to try and believe your friends. i used to think that i was really ugly but when sum 1 told me i was not, i had a proper look at myself, most of what it is, is wishfull thinkin, your proberly denying what u see. but i have neva seen u so i cannot say wether it is just u or not. hope i've helped
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Postby misatok11 » Mon Sep 01, 2003 8:09 pm

What you see in a mirror isn't the real you. Mirrors only represent you in 2 dimensions.
You also see yourself from a different angle than any else, you can't see what they see. I think if your friends say you aren't then they are better placed to see... :)
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Postby smile » Tue Sep 02, 2003 3:17 pm

I think that you are under weight, and if you feel obsessed by losing weight then you could have an eating disorder. Go to the doctors, if you feel you can and tell them how you feel.

I really don't think you should lose more weight, try to keep a steady weight otherwise your body will suffer from gainig and losing weight.

Take a look at this link. It is only a giude but I think that you are way under your ideal weight.

http://www.weightwatchers.co.uk/health/asm/calc_healthyweight.aspx
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Postby Avril » Tue Sep 02, 2003 4:32 pm

Hi. Thankyou all for your posts.

I checked out that site smile, The weight that went with my height (5"7') is 9 stone 12. That's just under 10 stone! I would look like a balloon!!! That's a rediculous weight if it is average!! [-X

I'm not going to the doctors. [-( They'll put me on the scales :oops: & just say "eat healthily, do some regular exersise and u'll be fine" or something. i just want to keep i to myself...

I don't know what else to do, I've tried running up and down the stairs when everybody's out, press ups, sit ups, etc... :-?

Anymore replys are welcome,

Avril xxx
I'm startin to trip, I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone.
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Postby smile » Wed Sep 03, 2003 9:17 am

[-X You wouldn't look like a balloon!! You need to feel more confident with yourself, I think you need to build your weight up. Aim for something like 9 stone but still do exerceise and heat healthily. Skipping meals is not the answer you won't lose anything that way. Excercise is the only proper way to lose weight, and by eating nothing you won't have any energy to excercise. Have regular meals, and don't snakc in between meals. Do some excercise but don't go over the top with it.
When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get them, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either.

Just remember to keep smiling!
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Postby Avril » Wed Sep 03, 2003 9:45 am

:shock: I am shocked that you think i should gain weight! If anything I should lose it!

[-( i can't put on weight as i am already big! Don't u understand? ](*,) I'm going to excersise loads by going to school sports clubs & i want to start swimming. There's a big problem though & that's i have to wear a bikin/cossie! :oops: I try & cover myself up as much as possible in the school changing rooms never mind swimming! + I don't have ne1 to go with. :-?

I am between 7 1/2 & 8 stone. I will never delibrately put on more than a stone that's crazy! =; agh! Surely skipping meals would help me lose weight as i would miss out on calories etc.. I could just have some energy food before exercising.... :-k

Avrilxxx
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Postby smile » Wed Sep 03, 2003 2:03 pm

Avril, you don't need to lose any weight. But if you want to that is entirely your choice. Skipping meals doesn't work, it just wrecks your body instead. You need amounts of protein, carbohydrates, minerals etc. and even your body does need a small amount of fat to keep functioning. If you skip meals you will lose these things. You don't have to skip them, just eat something healthy like a salad instead. For dinner, eat lots of fish and vegetables and have regular meals. As long as you eat healthily you won't look 'fat'.
When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get them, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either.

Just remember to keep smiling!
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Postby Jo » Wed Sep 03, 2003 11:15 pm

Hi Avril

I'm not going to start telling you whether or not you should start skipping meals etc. because, like Smile has already said, that's your choice. For the record, though, I agree with the people who have said that you actually sound underweight, not overweight.

Before you start changing your diet you should find out what the effects will be, then you can make an informed decision. See below for some links that might be useful;

http://www.foodstandards.gov.uk/healthi ... encalories
http://www.edauk.com/
http://www.suite101.com/welcome.cfm/female_body_image
http://www.drdonnica.com/display.asp?article=526
http://66.70.176.56/eofacts.htm
http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/info/mhgu/newmhgu28.htm
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Postby Ciara » Wed Sep 03, 2003 11:56 pm

Hi Avril, first of all its perfectly normal to feel like ur a ballon, believe me every girl u know has felt that way sometime or another.

Besides, ppl want 2 know the girl who is positive and fun to be with, and who excepts herself the way shes meant 2 be.

But if u want to have a toned body then do 3 sets of 10 sit-ups + press-ups a day and go swimming once a week. U may not think it will make a difference but it will. But dont over do it and make sure you eat 3 meals a day.

My friend got really depressed about her weight when we were 13 and never ate, and had to be taken to hospital, she took a long time to except that she was under weight (she was about 155cm and weighed 5-6 stone i think)

+ "not eating a "healthy diet" and skipping meals regulary causes spots on ur face, back and chest, dull skin, lank hair and has is supposed to be linked to blood disorders, worst than looking like a ballon.

luv
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Postby Ciara » Thu Sep 04, 2003 12:03 am

P.s - read "girls under pressure" by Jacqueline Wilson, believe me it really helps when u think no else understands, and dont worry about swimming alone, go in the evening + just do laps.
I agree with Jo tho u dont need to lose weight but hey ur decision.
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Postby Avril » Sat Sep 06, 2003 9:28 pm

Hey. Thankyou all again for replying.

Thanks very much for the sites Jo, I am still going through them with detail! I am still certain I am fat & don't see why you are all saying the opposite. It's so confusin.

Also, I'm not depressed, the opposite. I'm happy, lively, bubbly etc.. I just keep alot of things to myself or close friends...I will never let my weight issues effect my feelings, just control them differently & keep them separate...

To Ciara. I've read Jaqueline Wilsons "girls under pressure" many times. It's one of my fave books. And yeah it does help...kind of feeling i'm not doing it alone.

I just can't think of any more execising ideas. And, with going back to school i can't snack betwwen lessons & could easily skip lunch...it'll be worth it.

Avril xxx
I'm startin to trip, I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone.
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Postby Llisa » Sun Sep 07, 2003 3:27 am

Hi hun,
Well, since you didn't like people telling you that you're underweight...I won't say that you are.
But look at it from this angle...there are some of us...ahem...who are a lot heavier then that. I'm 5'9" and weigh 145 LBS. Not sure what that is in stones, but I do know that it's a lot more then what you're saying you weigh. And I think that some people would be offended to hear you say that that weight is ridiculous for the average person.
We're all different though...I'm sure a lot of girls your age and height would be ESTATIC to be your weight. But what you do with your body is up to you...just make sure you don't hurt yourself in the process.
Will be praying for you
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