Depressed

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Postby becky_boop » Wed Oct 15, 2003 5:07 pm

I cant handle this much more!!!!!! Now I find out from someone else my best friend has gone further than snogging with her boyfriend! To be quite honest I really dont mind if she has its the fact she didnt tell me! And everyone keeps saying to me "for god sake becky keep your nose out" but they dont understand how pushed out I feel. Everyone is having a go at me for being like this but shes my best friend and even if she hasnt gone any further I still feel like ive been substituted with her boyfriend! It hurts!

I just feel like im trapped inside my own skin and i cant get out. Sometimes I think it would be easier to just silently slip away but then I realise its not such a good idea!

Thanx for reading bec xxxx
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Postby woopdecker » Wed Oct 15, 2003 5:43 pm

No it isnt such a good idea, there's people who know you dont treat you like what everyone else does. She's your best mate and always will be, who's she ganna run to when she's split up with this b/f. You, people always move on when they move to secondry, it's a sad fact but it happens, and there isnt alot of things you can do about to be honest. But it gives you a chance to move on to, your best mate probaly wont know she's doing it, so you can either tell her how you feel or move on yourself. But at the end of the day, your always best mates.


Luv Maz
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Postby MelodyLinn » Fri Oct 24, 2003 6:50 am

Hiya Becky :D,

I disagree with woopdecker. You shouldn't have to put up with being her second best, she's your best friend and should know better. Just because there's a boy involved there is no reason for her to blow you off! [-X

Though some girls don't see that and feel so great to have a boyfriend and want to spend all her time with him. :-?

I suggest you tell her how you feel about this situation and how you feel. If she still feels the same way and goes for this boy then just leave her for a while. Eventually they will split up or she will miss you as a friend.

At the end of it you will be best friends again and another lesson learned! :wink:

Love & Peace,


Melody
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Postby becky_boop » Sun Nov 02, 2003 6:36 pm

Hi again, Sorry I bet Im doing your heads in! But at the minute I feel like the only people I can talk to are you lot! Alot of my friends dont really know any of my problems and I dont plan on telling them because they wont understand. The one that does know has her own major problems which are alot worse than mine and I dont want to bother her at the minute unless Im trying to help her out. The other friends that do know, well I just dont want to mention it to them anymore because I dont really think there interested.
The fact is I just feel so trapped. I feel like Im not needed; my best friend as you already know has found herself a boy and all my other friends just seem like they dont need me! As a result Ive turned back to self harm.
Im sorry about this it probably sounds absolutely pathetic. I just cant handle much more! :cry:
Lotsa love and kisses
Becky
xxx
Cant let go...
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Postby giomanach » Sun Nov 02, 2003 9:19 pm

Heya Becky,
You shouldnt need to feel trap, there are people around you, you just need to search for them.
The mate who has majour problems of her own will not sht you out, she's your mate, and by the sounds of it a close one, i'm sure she's problay thinking the same thing! Why don't you help each other out?If youre helping her out, she's definatly ganna return the favour and help you out, and i'm 100% sure she will.
No one on here's fed up of ya! This is a help page, your ment to spill ya guts out on here!!
You are needed, obviously your needed by the person you're helping out! Otherwise she wouldnt be here.
Loads of people have told me to keep busy when ever i feel like self harming, which is easier sed than done, but it has stopped me a few times this past week. And don't forget, you can't get through this alone, talk to your friends, they'll always help you, even if they've got problems of there own, like i said, they're problay thinking EXACTLY the same thing as you.

Chin up :)

-Gio
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Postby becky_boop » Wed Nov 12, 2003 6:55 pm

:cry: just as I thought things were looking up it all goes down hill. My friend has fell out with me because apparently I leave her out Im sure I dont and if I do I dont do it intentionally.

And my other friend is on the brink of suicide and Im so useless I never know the right words to say.

So as usual I go back to self-harm. Im sick of it what have I done to deserve this? :cry:
Lotsa love bec
Cant let go...
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Postby -iron- » Thu Nov 13, 2003 7:40 pm

noo don't do self harm ,it solves nothing, it doesn't make u feel better, it just takes your mind of it for a small moment, if your friend has fallen out with you, try and tell her your side of the story, and about your other friend, just be there for her, that is all you can do nothing else is expected from you.
show them no fear, show them no pain
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Postby misatok11 » Thu Nov 13, 2003 7:51 pm

Self harming leaves scars that will be there for the rest of your life. It can make the difference between getting a job or not, trust me as people can be that shallow.
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Postby Fidel » Fri Nov 14, 2003 2:19 pm

yes i know that - my cousin had a friend and tht happened to them
Last night I dreamt that somebody loved me.
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Postby Smiler_Princess » Sun Nov 16, 2003 8:55 pm

Hiya Becky,

I knew a girl who once said "What have I done to deserve this?" They said it all the time, I guess it is contagious. You've done absolutely nothing, just don't let things get to you. Don't see it as all these bad things being thrown at you, see it as a hurdle, a step. Once over it you'll never have to go back. You just have to work hard. It's the most difficult thing but in the end it is worth it. Trust me, I know. :roll:

As we both heard, there are some people who complain about everything, like queing up to get some lunch. They moan because they have to que, they moan because it's cold, they just moan. Others would just be happy they have lunch, even though they have to wait. Those people are better off. Be optimistic, see the good parts of everything and I promise you, you will be happier. Here's a quote which reminded me of that situation:


"Fear less, hope more;
Whine less, breathe more;
Talk less, say more;
Hate less, love more;
And all good things are yours."


Trouble is, being as optimistic and bubbly as possible, these people get you down eventually. They push the bad things onto you. As we both know, it happens and you've got to stop it. It has already happened but you can stop it from going any further.

To that post earlier on: You are thin & you are really pretty! As for not being good at anything, that's rubbish : You are the nicest, cutest person ever! & You are the best at being a friend! (& agen, you're 1 in a billion) :wink:

I'm always here for you, O:)

love your lil/big chicken xxx


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"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow."

"Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact."
"Because we can't call people without wings angels, we call them friends"

"I never wanted to be different...I just wanted to be me"
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Postby -iron- » Sun Nov 16, 2003 9:53 pm

i agree with tamsin, and i also am there for u
show them no fear, show them no pain
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Postby Daisy_Chain_Saw » Mon Nov 24, 2003 1:09 am

Hi Becky,

I've just been reading ur posts and to be honest – I’m freaked out! lol u sound just like me when I was 14. Pressure, pressure more pressure :o - to grow up, get a bf, be there for ur mates and always say the perfect thing, be brilliant in school, become dazzlingly attractive to everyone. Plus the fact that you feel like u cant talk to anyone about it, ur mates dont understand u - its a horrible feeling, so alone. :cry:

But don’t worry - you'll soon realise that looks aren’t everything; I got a bf who I think was just into my looks and that ended badly, very badly. You want to find someone who respects you and trusts you - looks play a very small part in the long run. :D Don't be jealous of ur mates who u think are prettier than u, u sound like ur rele caring and have a good sense of humour, much more important maybe not to all boys - but do u rele want someone who just likes how u look and nothing else? I hope not.

For school, just do whats right for you - its ur life, so explain to ur mum and dad that u want to chose out ur own future, but u will still keep them in the picture, while rele they have no power over what u do in school anyway, lol. :P

If ur self harming and feel that u cant stop, talk to one of ur close mates, get her round for a parent free movie night or something and have a lonnnnnnnnnnng chat with her. Sometimes u can forget how important it is to share things with ur friends but u have too - they r ur safety net in life, lol I sound so cheesy. But especially in ur early teens u can forget to talk about ur problems and think u can handle them all by urself - but mates rele do help.

lol, this post has turned into a bit of a lecture - sorry! but if u want to talk then I'm always here.


Luv Daisy x
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Postby becky_boop » Mon Nov 24, 2003 9:50 pm

I just want to say thanx to all three of you who posted last. They're really nice e-mails and made me feel much better especialy to know that you've been through the same thing Daisy.

Im now trying to be much more optimistic and Im not going to look back on the bad stuff just the good things because I know one day EVERYTHING will be happy. (Until the next bad day comes along.....not really) :D

Oh and although I dont really believe some of them thanx you lot for the compliments. :oops:

Lotsa love Bec xxxx :D
Cant let go...
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Postby saz » Mon Nov 24, 2003 9:54 pm

you should believe them and accept the compliments graciously.. why would they lie to you?

Am so glad you are feeling better and gathering those positive thoughts keep up the good work.

Hope everything goes well for you
Doesn't really matter what the eye is seeing
cos i'm in love with the inner being
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Postby -iron- » Wed Nov 26, 2003 7:35 pm

yea we wud neava lie to you about something you feel this strongly about.
show them no fear, show them no pain
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