I'm pregnant, what do I do?

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I'm pregnant, what do I do?

Postby BABY LOVE » Thu Feb 27, 2003 10:19 pm

Hi I am a 14 year old with a major problem,I found out I am 5 months pregnant 2 wks ago (now 5 1/2 mnth)!
The only reason why I haven't found out sooner is that I've never had a period in my life & I honestly didn't think I could get pregnant as me & my B/F Mark use condoms & I am on the pill! :-?
I have been going out with Mark for 9 months & I love him so much!
I haven't told mark yet as he is older than me (17), so I am scared that he won't want anything to do with me & the baby! :cry:
I did up untill now consider myself quite mature for my age but this proves that I am anything but,doesn't it?
I haven't told my parents yet as they don't even know that I am going out with Mark,as they dislike him because he has been in a young offenders prison for burglary!
I love Mark so much that if I tell my parents I know they will probably get the police involved as I am under age but I did consent to have sex with him so he isn't to blame!
I am really scared & confused about what I should do,I am starting to get a bump now so i won't be able to hide it for much longer,& I am sure that Mark & my parents are getting suspicious as I keep making excuses up so i don't have to do things I'm not suposed to do!
Pleasehelp as I am scared at what might happen! :cry:
Baby love :roll:
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Postby Gollumsgirl » Thu Feb 27, 2003 11:37 pm

I think you should tell your b/f & your parents.
As the longer you keep something a secret or stert to lie the harder it is tell!
At this moment in time you need some support.
being pregnant at any age is difficult,but you are still very young so will need that added support!
Take care! :D
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Postby smile » Fri Feb 28, 2003 11:18 am

The only thing you can do is talk, I pretty sure it's too late to have an abortion, so sooner or later your going to have a lot of explaining to do. It will probably be easier to do it now rather than face everyone when you've given birth. Also they can help you make decisions for instance, are you going to keep the baby, who will look after it etc.

You should tell your boyfriend as well, its going to be hard to hide a bump. Good luck and I hope things work out for you,
When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get them, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either.

Just remember to keep smiling!
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Postby tammybligh » Fri Feb 28, 2003 11:20 am

I agree with Gollumsgirl on this. The first thing you've gotta do is tell him and your parents. Like you said, you're not gonna be able to hide this for much longer.

At the end of the day, there's not a lot that they can at this stage. I suspect they will be angry and disappointed, but they will come to terms with it and they will stand by you, because that's what parents do. They can't help if they don't know the situation, you've got to be completely honest with them from now on... bear in mind that they've been through pregnancy before and they will be more aware of the procedures involved.

Sadly, there's no 'quick fix' with this. I hope everything works out for the best. No doubt you'll feel a lot better about this when it's all out in the open and you're not having to lie to people anymore.
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Postby BABY LOVE » Sat Mar 01, 2003 12:24 am

Thanx for all of the advice I know that you are all right. :oops:
I will have to tell my parents & B/F this w/end as the sooner I get this other with the better! :cry:
Baby Love :roll:
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Postby BABY LOVE » Thu Mar 06, 2003 7:10 pm

On Sunday I got my Parents & Mark together for a meal & told them everthing. :oops:

Mark said he would stand by me if he had to but felt he was too young!
My Mum was so angry that she started hitting me,she didn't stop until my Dad told her to I thought that he was standing up for me but I was wrong! :cry:
As he said that he had "A plan of action",my Dad is the type of person that has to have back up plans if anything goes wron in life!His "Plan of action" was that I go & live with my cousin in Wales untill my baby is born.
Then I could put my bay up for adoption & no one would be any the wiser!
When I told him that this sounded like a plot from a soap & that he was being stupid he got mad & threw me out.
Ever since I have been staying at my aunty's,she knows everything as I gave told her! :(
I think people at skool are guessing something is up,as they keep asking why I'm not living at home,& if I've split from Mark!
But what hurt me the most was hearing some girls in my PE class calling me FAT! :(
I'm really confused at the moment,should I go along with my Parents plan to keep them happy or try & make it on my own! :cry:

BABYLOVE :wink:
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Postby Stacker » Thu Mar 06, 2003 8:24 pm

Hi Babylove,it sounds like you are having a really rough time at the moment!
Maybe you should try talking to yuor parents again (easier said than done!) as you need them to support you during this time!
If I was you (& I'm not trying to sound patranizing!) I would get rid of your B/F,I know you said you love him but it sounds like that he thinks he's getting into something that he doesn't want to do! :(
If this is the case he will probably decide to stay with you for a while then leave you which will make this situation alot harder for you & your baby!
I know this sounds really mean but it does happen,it doesn't mean that you can't stay friends for your baby sake!
I hope this helps (I doubt it).
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Postby BABY LOVE » Fri Mar 07, 2003 7:56 pm


Thanks Stacker for the advice. I am going to try & talk to my Parents again this w/end when they visit. :-?
Hopefully this time it goes better (fingers crossed!).
But I'm still confused about what I should do about Mark as i love him too much to break up with him & it is his baby! :cry:

Luv Babylove. :wink:
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Postby Clairebabebear » Fri Mar 21, 2003 6:52 pm

Well i was 18/19 when i had my first baby (i was raped) and i don't have perants (coz they were killed) so i think that u should tell ur b/f.
The guy who raped me, i knew him and told him and he did a runner but if This Mark really dose love u then i think that u should tell him and then confront ur perants together. BUT U SHOULDN'T BE HAVING SEX UNDER 16!!!! :evil:
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Postby DHa » Fri Mar 21, 2003 7:02 pm

From a blokes point of view y the hell wud u want 2 keep a baby a this age but ur scarily fertile n uv put the shits up me coz my birds on the minipill n we usually use condoms but her periods stopd a yr ago
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Postby Enigma » Fri Mar 21, 2003 11:09 pm

Please note that children read these forums DHa.
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Postby BABY LOVE » Sun Mar 23, 2003 5:04 pm

Just when I thought things couldn't get anyworse! :cry:
Mark dumped me on saturday nite saying he was too young to have a baby but if I needed anything for our baby he would try his best!
You were right stacker!But this doesn't make my situation any easier as my parents have just let me move back home on the condition that I don't expect too much from them :x !
I'm seriously considering leaving skool to look after my baby as I haven't really got anyone to turn to! :(
If anyone has any advice,please help!
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Postby Stacker » Sun Mar 23, 2003 8:32 pm

Sorry to hear about your bad news Babylove,this sounds like an extremely hard time in your life for you especially at 14! :o
It sounds like Mark wanted the fun but not the responsibilities that can go with it.
I hope you can sort this out for yours & your baby's sake or life is just gonna get alot harder once him/her is born!
Your parents sound like they are being a bit too hard on you as you they let you move back but on certain conditions!
This is gonna sound really horrible but YOU ARE STILL A CHILD YOURSELF,what they are asking is too much.
I hope that you do get this sorted,the quicker the better!
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Postby BABY LOVE » Thu Mar 27, 2003 6:31 pm

THANKS FOR ALL THE ADVICE! :D
Have I just made the worse mistake of my life.......I have got back with Mark as he told me that he missed me & that he didn't want our baby growing up without a dad,like he did!
So I couldn't resist him & we got back together (last nite)! :lol:
But when I went to skool this morning his little sister came up to me & said that I had trapped him into coming back to his relationship!And that he thought that the only good thing that he would get out of it was the benefits of staying at home while I'm at skool to look after our baby!So he didn't have to work! :-?
I have just been to his house & asked if this was true and we ended up having a MAJOR row! But he didn't deny it!He wouldn't answer my questions!
Please help!My life is getting so complicated at the moment that all I can think about doing is ending it!
BABYLOVE :wink: :roll:
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Postby Jo » Thu Mar 27, 2003 11:21 pm

Hi Babylove

Are you getting any support from anywhere or are you trying to cope with all this on your own?

What is the school being like with you? Is there anyone there that you can trust? Maybe someone at the antenatal clinic who you can talk to? You really shouldn't be coping with this all on your own.

You can find advice on the web site below, you can also contact them completely anonymously by e-mail, chat room or text message - they are especially for young people;
http://www.whatnow.co.uk/
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