Problems in me

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Problems in me

Postby Student » Mon Sep 17, 2007 2:22 pm

Recently I have been going through changes, having a taste of an adult life and creating my own opinions. I have spoken to mum about it and she says that it is normal. I go to university and about to go into my thirst year, however becuase if some realisation I have been failing exams but just in one subject. I have retaken then and have still failed. I know it is becuase of my inner thought and realisation that I have made a mistake with the choice of my subject. I thought I studied hard for it but did not succeed. I dont kno what is going on. I dont kno how to make me feel and to make me push myself to have to do it. I am so confused with what ia going on... I cannot tell my parents about me staying for another year at university becuase my life will be over, I will have to be known as the stupid girl... and I cannot face my parents. What shall I do about these feelings and should I stop university? Please someone older advise me. I am 20 years old.
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Postby all_apologies » Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:24 pm

Hey, and welcome to ProblemPages.

Firstly, just to clarify, what is the "realisation"? Is it the fact that you now know that your course isn't for you? Trust me, I have loads of friends who are in your position. It's usually relatively easy to switch courses, and your credits will probably get you into second year of a degree that's more suited to you.

I don't think you should continue doing something you don't like, particularly if you're struggling to pass. If you've failed your second year exams because you're uninterested, isn't it risky that this might continue into your third and fourth year exams too? Coming clean with your parents and undertaking that extra year doing something else will probably end up saving you a lot of time and unhappiness in the long run.
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Postby Student » Mon Sep 17, 2007 11:28 pm

Thank you for welcoming me. Your letter had helped me a lot. The realisation is like beginning to notice everyday working of the life, having your own strong adult oponions on the politics around you and what you feel like in the society when having to undergo work experience, meet new people etc.
The problem is that it is not my choice to choose what I want to do or not but my parent's choice. For the moment I do not understand why I could not make myself study for that subject and if there are any ways possible to maybe make me think of it as not the enemy but a friend. Im not sure if I have put it on paper correctly but if you do not understant please let me know and I will try to refrase what I want to say...
Thank you one more time
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Postby kitten » Tue Sep 18, 2007 11:34 am

Why is it your parents choice what you study? I'm guessing from your phrasings that they may be very traditional or from a different culture.

However if that is not the case, it really is up to you what you study, if your parents have their heart set on a career for you then fair enough but are they really thinking of you as its your life and your career that is at stake, will you really be happy in this chosen field or will you spend the rest of your working life resenting them?

I never knew what I wanted to study and its only now at 26 that I have started studying - I am doing my degree through the Open University as I have a full time job - but I am happy to study - because the subject matter is something that interests me.

At school I hated maths and I didn't study well for it as I didn't enjoy it. Like A_A has said if you are failing now because you don't enjoy it this could continue.

If you don't feel you can talk to your parents about your course choice is there someone at the University that you can approach to discuss this and perhaps they could arrange to meet with your parents and you so you can all discuss your choices together having an outside party may help your parents to see why you are not happy with this choice.
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Postby Brighter » Wed Oct 03, 2007 8:24 pm

Who cares what other people think?
Surely your parents should be proud that you even went to university, and you haven't given up with the exams either!
If your parents can't see how talented you are by getting into uni then they obviously don't know what's right in front of their eyes!

You should go back to university and ignore your parents.
They'll be glad that you carried on in uni when you've got a decent job and are way above them :)
xx
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