uni year wasted

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uni year wasted

Postby Raven » Wed May 21, 2008 6:34 pm

I have had a pretty much wasted my first yearr of Uni both in terms of academic achievement and social life. I have missed countless tests and lectures, and havent handed in a couple of assignments as I just can't be bothered. It sounds terrible but I'm not sure I care that much but feel as if I should! I haven't had an easy year, and am pretty certain I'm leaving after this year anyway. I joined clubs at the start, never went to them ever again. Disliked going out and did make some friends but they never wanted to do anything with me.

I'm struggling with depression and trying to get over my boyfriend too. I just feel a bit stupid because I've racked up 6grand debt and won't even pass the year to show for it! I am disappointed with myself for barely trying, but I just can't apply myself. I'm trying to maintain it's the depression that has stopped me from having a good time or doing any work and it's not the true me. Now I'm probably going to leave my future is uncertain once again but I feel as if I need to remove myself from uni to overcome the depression.

Somebody tell me I haven't been a complete fool by wasting this year?
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Postby captainf » Wed May 21, 2008 7:37 pm

Okay dont worry too much. Uni does apply alot of pressure on people and if you are depressed uni will only be adding to your worries. If you really want to leave then I think you should. Staying may well make you feel worse and if your heart isnt in it then leaving may help. Dont worry though, it doesnt make you a failure or anything - a friend of mine didnt go to uni and shes training as an accountant now.. and a few of my friends, including myself, didnt go to uni and yet we're training to be pilots. So what im saying is that you can still make something of yourself even if you drop out of uni. Again, if you do drop out of uni, change your priorities abit - Find a job (this is something that could lead to you making new friends + help you pay off your debt) A degree is always an option in the future - You could end up getting a degree via the open uni or evening classes.

Are you having counselling? If not, I suggest asking your doctor to refer you. Having someone listen will definitely help you.
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Postby bellajennie » Wed May 21, 2008 9:27 pm

First year at uni is always difficult and you are among many who fail first year (sorry to put it bluntly). However, what you have now is a fresh start. The chance to either put uni behind you or instead give it another new go to make something of it. You could even change course and start again if you prefered. Being a second time fresher might give you the opportunity to try not to make the same mistakes and a clean slate may be just what you need. I know it is very demoralising to continue with something you think you have already lost hope in. I know it looks like I'm saying stick at uni, and I guess I am, but I am coming to the end of three years which I have incredibly enjoyed. And I had similar problems in my first year...you just use them to drive you forwards.
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Postby Bel Bel » Thu May 22, 2008 10:23 am

I agree with cpatian flynn and many succesful people never had any exams let alone degrees
You need to concentrate on getting better and once the depression has lifted you will find a new energy that will just take you to new places
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Postby lilessexgal » Thu May 22, 2008 3:44 pm

if you feel that leaving uni will make you happier then i dont see why not.

at the end of the day its your well being that matters not some grades on a piece of paper.

many people go on the find jobs they like without exam grades.

i left college with no a levels but im doing absolutely fine and im happy.

i think if i had gone to uni i wouldnt be like i am today.
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Postby Steve1213284 » Tue May 27, 2008 9:20 am

I think lilessexgal is right. At the end of the day, you have to be happy and you have to find a way to do so. Studying can be depressing but don't see it as a wasted year. Try to look at it as a hurdle you will overcome and will contribute to your character development.
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Re: uni year wasted

Postby kleigh111 » Sun Jul 26, 2009 11:14 pm

Hey,

I failed my first year at uni by one module. They let me stay on the course and re sit my module but i got really depressed living away from home and my friends and family. I found myself only getting out off bed to have a shower and eat, other than that i would just watch films all day and not bother with uni. My boyfriend would visit me every day on the train and i would literally break down crying when he left in the morning. I ended up being really ill and the doctor even gave me blood pressure tablets! I was only 20!

Eventually i told my mom i wanted to come home and she was a massive support. I moved back home and applied to a local university where they offered me a place in my second year on the course i wanted. I haven't lost out, just took me a little longer to get there than the rest. That doesn't meant you wont ever get there.

You need to have a long think about what you actually want and then take the first step. After all you have no-one to please but yourself, no matter what parents say. If your happy they will be happy for you.
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Re: uni year wasted

Postby Lilitta » Fri Jul 02, 2010 6:48 pm

Of course you are not a fool!
The main thing right now is to stop blaming yourself and going over and over what you have done, as it will only result in further depression and misery. Instead, you could pull yourself up by the bootstraps and try resolve the situation.
The first stop would be the college councillor (if you didn't go there already). Instead of crying or blaming yourself or others, ask him, as calmly as you can, what are the solutions for students with overdrafts and debts. Usually, colleges are pretty scared about students running into trouble over debt, so they might be able to help you. You might like to talk to your bank representative, but really, the college people should be the ones to go to first. Also try finding out about "hardship funds" for students who suddenly find themselves in difficult circumstances - if you are staying for next year, it may be worth knowing about just the same. Also, you could call or email your Local Educational Authority (LEA) for financial advice.
The next stop would be the Senior Tutor, the Head of Department, or whoever is responsible for the academic work in your subject. Talk to them about the possibility of taking a year out (so as to return next year) or even repeating one year all over, as you have had some serious problems on the domestic front (at my first university where I did BA, I knew at least 3 people who did the same). From reading your post, I had an impression that most of your problem had to do with adjusting to the new rhythm of university life - and if you repeat this year, you would by now feel calmer and more used to the surroundings, not to mention that you would already know what to expect in terms of studying! :P
If you feel at odds with your subject (do not worry, we have all been down that road!), maybe instead of dropping uni altogether, you could apply anew for a different one. Lots of very successful students I know did the same - from Law to English, from French to Politics, and so on and so forth. In our day, no matter what the media can say, a good university education is a valuable asset - not even because of the degree, but because of the contacts you make and skills you learn. Moreover, perhaps on a different course you would meet some people who really share your interests, rather than the Fresher's Week chance acquaintances, who are then gone only not to be heard of ever again. Don't worry about those people and clubs you feel you have missed out on. Your true interests will shine through with time.
If you are really worried about depression, maybe seeing a doctor about it would be useful, before it grows into something really bad. But before trying medications, I would suggest first addressing those problems as described above, and then giving yourself some rest (especially now it is summer) - nothing complicated, but a walk in the park, a decent book or taking vitamin supplements. Over summer, concerning your debt, it may be worthwhile to find a job which would at least bring in some money for the future - and who knows, maybe friends as well!
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Re: uni year wasted

Postby snail » Fri Jul 02, 2010 9:32 pm

That's a lot of good advice, Lilitta :) However, Raven first posted this thread over two years ago - the date of the first post is at the top - so she has probably worked it out by now.
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