Being driven and ambitious is causing me problems

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Being driven and ambitious is causing me problems

Postby sakuraba1982 » Sun Jul 06, 2008 9:32 am

Sorry for the long read............................

From the age of 8 i always wanted to be a policeman, so growing up i always had something to shoot for. I joined the police at the age of 19 at the age of 23 i was off duty and saw someone being jumped by a gang of bullys from my year at school in my local nightclub. I jumped in to try and help (they were all kicking him in the head and i think they would have killed him) I damaged my back in this incident so had to be signed off from work.

I was off for about 6 weeks and when i went back to work the people who i thought were my mate just took the **** out of me saying i got beaten up etc and my SGT took me into his office to have a go at me about my case papers that he had to deal with. From this moment i knew i no longer wanted to do this job, I was still living at home with my parents at this point. My parents were going through a breakup at this point and putting me right in the middle of things. (My dad can be very violent towards my mother and has almost kicked her to death several times in the past).

So i was in the situation were i had to try to get a place with my partner as well as find a new job as well as worrying what would happen when my dad was drunk. So i took the first rubbish job i was offered which was a 12k a year paycut. I was made to feel like a failure by my family for quitting the police , I was told i would never get a job as good as that one etc nobody seemed to care that i was having a breakdown.

So i moved out and stuck at this sales job for a bout 4 months, i knew it was only a temp thing. I decided to get qualified in computing as this was always something else that i wanted to do. after a few weeks I wasgoing out of my mind with boredom and frustration,6 months earlier i had been doing an interesting job (I would never go back to the police) now i was selling caravans and too skint to do anything the bills were hammering us and all we could afford to do was stay in the flat.

I knew i was better than this job and i was embarased to tell anybody what i did. A temp job came up at a local council to work the town cctv camera's my police experience landed me the job. however it was not a perm position and the pay was not great. It did not allow me to study and get some IT qualifications during the night shifts however. I had someting to shoot for at this point but it took me nearly a year of job hunting to land my 1st IT role with a company as I kept losing out to people with more experience than me.

I am now employed at another local council as 1st line IT support , i'mbasicallythe guywho answers the phone and tries to fix the problem over the phone. Ihave done this for 14 months while struggling with money and sitting exams. Again this sort of role is worst case senario for someone like me stuck to a phone and getting paid 10k a year less than my colleages. I'm ready to move up the ladder and get a lifestyle back where me and my partner can afford to do things.

My partner is not driven she says she would be happy no matter what i did, I just feellike all i have done for the past 3 years is struggle since i left the police. I just get so frustrated with the way things are.....

sorry about the long read and i know there is more than likely enough issues in that post to be split into 3 posts
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Postby Bel Bel » Mon Jul 07, 2008 10:04 am

Just go for it
You sound ready to move up the ladder and you now have some experience behind you
If your partner will support you no matter what you do what have you got to lose
I wouldn't worry about negative comments from th family, when they have perfect lives then they can judge you but from what you have described I think they have no room to be critising you

Good Luck it sounds like you deserve a break
Life is for living so live it to the fullest

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