Too skinny :(

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Too skinny :(

Postby spacegirl » Wed Jul 22, 2009 3:32 pm

Since I was a teenager I've had real trouble putting on weight, I went through some crazy stuff in my teenage years and I was borderline anorexic, my hair was falling out etc., in short i had real trouble with food and I've never really come round. It's not a case whereby I'm worried about getting fat, I simply just do not have an appetite, and if i'm stressed or upset it's worse, and I'd go days missing meals and not even noticing that i haven't eaten. I am sick of people telling me I'm "too skinny" it really hurts my feelings, and I try really hard to keep weight on and eat healthy square meals every day. the heaviest i've ever been is 8.5 stone, and i'm 5ft. It does my head in because it makes me look a lot younger than I am, and people don't take me seriously. Especially in work when i'm dealing with people over the phone or by email it's fine, all very professional and all until we meet and they start treating me like a child.

Anyway, the past while i'd been under a lot of stress with trying to find a job before my contract ended, deadlines in work, money worries, and also my ex boyfriend who i finished with recently but is still messing with my head, but i didn't notice i was losing weight or not eating, until the past week or so when people started telling me i was skinny and i started to notice myself. the last straw was today when i went for lunch with a colleague and I ordered steak with vegetables and chips. when the waitress came to lift our plates, she made a big show about how i'd finished my meal, these were her exact words:

"ooh la la she ate everything the little mademoiselle! When I gave her her dish I thought she'd pick at it and i thought to myself - what a waste!"

She didn't even address me, she addressed my colleagues, as if i was a child!

On my way back to the office i called into a pharmacy and weighed myself - I'm under 7 stone. :(

I'm just furious. I'm 25 years old and people speak to me like that.

Has anyone any idea how i can put weight on without stuffing my face with rubbish? I don't like fast food really, and that's not the kind of weight i want to put on. can a GP refer me to a dietician or is that something I have to find privately?
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby rufio89 » Wed Jul 22, 2009 3:36 pm

A GP should be able to give you some advice I think.

I cant believe that woman did that, that's awful.

My sisters are like you, they're natually very skinny, and it's not that they avoid food, they just dont think about it.

My sister recently put on quite a bit of weight (so she's normal weight now), and I think it was just by eating more of the same, having larger portions, and just making sure she didnt skip any meals. The more you eat, the more you'll want to eat.



a bit OT but I really want a nice steak and chips now lol.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby Bel Bel » Wed Jul 22, 2009 4:07 pm

Yes my sister is like you too
You could try getting hypnotised to enjoy food more
I know people who have tried this to dampen their appetitie and it did work so i don't see why it won't work the other way
It might be difficult but it's always best to use someone other people have used and found it worked, could be for something diferent like smoking, as long as you don't have to go for lots of visits and get ripped off
my daughter just got hypnotised for her fear of cows, nearly crashed during a driving lesson so when she passed i made her go. £50 one session and she can now drive past a cow without freaking out, she doesn't like them but is much better
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby spacegirl » Wed Jul 22, 2009 4:10 pm

that's a great idea actually...

i love food, when i go to a restaurant i'd have a starter dinner dessert, coffee, wine the works, but i don't feel hungry until i actually sit down. my problem is that it doesn't actually occur to me that i have to eat until i tell myself to. which is very annoying. and as i said if i'm stressed or busy i'll skip meals, then my stomach shrinks and i can't eat when it does come to mealtime.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby Bel Bel » Wed Jul 22, 2009 4:18 pm

I tend to eat less when I am stressed. I think it works either way you can comfort eat or go off your food. It never seems to be on an even keel when your stressed
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby captainf » Wed Jul 22, 2009 8:36 pm

I'm kinda like you in that I was close to being diagnosed as anorexic when I was about 18 or 19 because my BMI was about 17 or so. I Can lose weight just by thinking about it but putting weight on is somewhat of a big task. I've come to the conclusion its because of my lifestyle, and not the fact that I dont eat enough, just general stresses - funding my flying training, how long will it take, what if I lose my medical, I want to get married and have kids one day but whos gonna put up with me while im training etc All this goes round in my head constantly and has since I was about 18. I think once im finally settled i'll put weight on.. and I think your situation is similar - you are always in contract work so you know whenever you live somewhere or work somewhere its temporary and the pressure is there to find another job and another place to live. You've had to get used to living in a new country too and now that is coming to an end very soon. Your ex is also messing your head up and thats an additional pressure that you really dont want and also something that will cause you to lose weight. I think once you've gone back home and managed to settle in you may start to put weight on again.

Also yes you can get your doc to refer you to a dietician, I saw one when I was 22 I think. I'm not too bad now though because i've varied my diet abit. I try to eat things that include rice or pasta. Try eating things like Spaghetti bolognese. Sometimes for lunch I cook some pasta shells and pour bolognese sauce on them, its quick, easy and tastes wonderful. Dont be ashamed to eat pizza and foods like that too. It all adds up :P

Most importantly make a visit to your doctor and get a reference to a dietician.

Its never nice to be judged on weight though. Sometimes its okay to accept certain jokes about it, but most of the time I tend to not enjoy people making comments - who are normally the first people to say they either never judge people or are quick to tell others its wrong when they do it without realising.

Finally, from the photos i've seen of you, you dont look too skinny to me.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby RagDoll » Thu Jul 23, 2009 9:53 am

In addition to what Captain said about lifestyles affecting your weight (which I agree with), I also think that people are simply built in different ways - some people have high metabolisms and therefore find it hard to put on weight despite what they eat (my boyfriend is like that).

I think you should speak to your GP though, they should be able to help.

With regards to people commenting on your weight, just ignore them, to be honest a lot of them are probably just jealous that you are so slim. I know worrying about being too thin is just as awful as worrying about being over-weight, but I bet a lot of people that are larger than yourself are probably just envious hence the comments!
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby snail » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:05 am

RagDoll wrote:I also think that people are simply built in different ways - some people have high metabolisms and therefore find it hard to put on weight despite what they eat


Yeah, my male flatmate is 6 foot and weighs less than 9 stone. He's always been like that. Technically he's hugely underweight, but the doctor checked him out when he was about 18 and said it was just the way he is. He doesn't take any formal exercise (although he rarely sits still) and he eats like a horse.

I tend to be on the chubby side because I like my chocolate, but if I get stressed I can lose weight very quickly indeed. I just lose interest in food and forget to eat, like Spacegirl.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby m_m » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:16 am

I have removed this post due to identity issues, I hope that is not a problem x
Last edited by m_m on Tue Oct 20, 2009 4:16 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby Bel Bel » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:16 am

A chubby snail :rofl: - the image is making me laugh

Here is a really fat snail to make you feel all skinny, not sure how this one would get back in his shell
http://www.kortestatuesandfountains.com ... _MM22_.JPG

And a "real" fat snail that couldn't stop eating even for the photo
http://media.photobucket.com/image/fat% ... /snail.jpg
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby RagDoll » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:17 am

Yeh, I mean if you can't do anything about it, then you can't do anything about it, it's obviously just the way you're made basically. My Dad and boyfriend are the same (damn my Mother.. why couldn't I have had my Dad's slender frame?!? haha)

When I get stressed I tend to comfort eat, which is probably why I'm fatter than I'd like to be!! *sigh*.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby Bel Bel » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:18 am

you don't look fat in your photos, it's hanging round with the slender ones that is obviously making you feel bigger than you are
I would be quite happy to be your size
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby rufio89 » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:20 am

Things like avacado, cashew nuts etc, are really good for you, but very high calorie. Eat lots of them :)
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby Moose » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:22 am

I can also understand this one and have been in a similar situation with people saying stupid things about my weight (which they would never do if we were really overweight - not to our faces anyway). It's really hurtful and it always drove me mad when I'd be at family meals and people would say "you've done really well" - especially my nan, although the funny thing now is that people say it to her!

I have a stomach problem and it was particularly bad during my late teens and early twenties. I wouldn't want to eat much and would be full after one crisp. My mother used to indulge this and if I said I wanted one fish finger, a lettuce leaf and four chips, she would give me exactly that. Now I live with my partner and I still have times when I feel I can't eat but I'm lucky because my gf does the majority of the cooking so if she makes me something she just whacks it all there on the plate - no messing! If it's there I'll usually munch my way through it eventually - so I get more rather than just having the one lettuce leaf. I'm the heaviest I've ever been now (8 stone - I'm 5 ft 2) and do get fewer stupid comments from people now. The other thing I do is actively try to have a specific lunch break at a certain time and have something to eat even if I don't actually want it. That's the hardest thing for me - eating when I'm not hungry. But I've kind of got into a habit now really.
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Re: Too skinny :(

Postby spacegirl » Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:51 am

thanks so much for your advice everyone - i suppose i don't pay attention to what nutrition, calories etc. is in my food when i eat it so aiming to eat higher calorie food and pasta etc. is a good idea.

I can completely relate to that moose "you've done really well!"

what are we, 5??

my flatmate says that to me all the time and i feel like cracking up every time but i just bite my tongue.

Ragdoll - you are not "fat" at all - you have a lovely figure! being this thin is so annoying, i can NEVER get stuff to fit me and i love clothes... putting a lovely dress on in topshop and looking at it hanging off my frame like a coathanger is the most depressing thing ever.

right - new years resolution (late, i know) - proper calorific meals 3 times a day no matter what.

I'm inspired now - thanks :)
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