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Childhood cancer, now have complications with sex-life

PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 10:23 am
by baskinbb
Hi all,

This is a bit of a long shot, but I'm just wondering if there's anyone out there in the same boat as me. I was diagnosed with cancer of the bladder (Rhabdomyosarcoma) when I was less than one year old (I'm now in my mid-20s) and underwent radio- and chemotherapy. My bladder and parts of my vagina were removed and these were only reconstructed in my late teens. Apologies if that's too much information for some. :) Basically, because of the vaginoplasty, sex can be difficult. I first had sex at the age of 20, after many failed attempts and If I don't have regular sex, things become absolutely impossible - after I broke up with my ex-boyfriend (we'd been together for almost three years), I didn't feel like sex for several months, and when I tried again, there was no space (to explain: the radiotherapy slowed down the development of my pelvis and fused it in places. The surgery involved parts of my pelvis being chipped away - about as painful as it sounds - and then a 'neovagina' being constructed. All very space-age... :D). After much mental and physical turmoil, things became possible again and my sex-life now is pretty good. However, lots of positions are difficult and it's frustrating. I'm adventurous by nature and there's so much I want to do, but can't. My husband says he's perfectly happy and that we just need to give it time, but it's so difficult. I know it's unlikely, but is there anyone else out there who's gone through the same thing? Or can anyone point me in the right direction? Would be so grateful for any advice you can offer. :)

Re: Childhood cancer, now have complications with sex-life

PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 11:30 am
by ILoveChristmas
Hi baskinbb,

The exact issues that you're having are a little 'precise' for people on here to be going through too, however that doesn't mean that we're not here for you if you want to get things off your chest or have a rant, so please stay.

I had a quick look online for a few places whose members may be a little more 'in tune' with your particular troubles:

http://www.google.co.uk/#sclient=psy&hl=en&safe=off&source=hp&q=Rhabdomyosarcoma+forum&aq=f&aqi=g-v1&aql=&oq=&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&fp=e10caccee6e6b7ea&biw=1046&bih=598

http://www.google.co.uk/#sclient=psy&hl=en&safe=off&source=hp&q=neovagina+forum&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&oq=&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&fp=e10caccee6e6b7ea&biw=1046&bih=598

The links above will take you to the results of a couple of Google searches, and it seems that there are a lot of forums and websites out there.

It sounds like you have a very loving and understanding husband, which is exactly what you need and deserve. Good luck!

Re: Childhood cancer, now have complications with sex-life

PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 11:38 am
by baskinbb
Thanks so much! :) Will check out the links. :)