Am I Bi?! Who Knows!

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Am I Bi?! Who Knows!

Postby dappychick88 » Tue Dec 05, 2006 7:04 am

Hey there,

The title of the thread kind of explains all... but i will fill in the gaps and elaborate on some information for you all.

I am 18, female and have had a few relationships with guys. However, over the last few months (on and off) i have started to find girls attractive - not just their looks, but personality too. I have kissed a couple of girls before, what what girl doesn't when they are young and drinking?!

The thing is, i thought i had these feelings due to me being single and recently breaking up with my ex bf, however, even when i was with him, i found girls attractive.

It would be easy enough if i was just attracted to girls, however, i also find many guys very good looking etc.

My problem is, for which i am looking for answers if that is possible, is whether it is just a phase? am i bi? how do i go about flirting with women when i am known as a 'straight' girl?

Answers would be most appreciated, thanks

x
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Postby Hurting angel » Tue Dec 05, 2006 5:30 pm

i was just speaking to my girly friends about this exact thing the other day. Apparently every single one of them had gone through this phase of finding girls attractive and kissing them and so on to experiment. However only time can tell if u are actually bi sexual or not and only you can really know for sure. amybe u should give it time and just see what happens and experiment at ur own pace. soon you will know trust me everyone i know have now found out after their time of confusion...including me lol. to flirt i would start speaking to new girls that you find attractive and be as you would when flirting with anyone else.goodluck.xxx
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Postby dollydiamond » Tue Dec 05, 2006 6:28 pm

i dont know whether this will help but if you are known as "straight" by all ypur friends maybe you should try flirting and experimenting with completely new ppl!!
:D GOOD LUCK!! :D
iloveyou.. xx
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Postby dappychick88 » Tue Dec 05, 2006 7:46 pm

that's true - i'm at uni in brighton, so i suppose that won't be too difficult. there are plenty of places to go, and i know that, but actually plucking up the courage to go is tricky, especially as many people i know and live with are 'funny' towards gay people. i don't mean that in the sense that they are completely homophobic, but as i'm seen as 'straight' they may see me in a different light and not approve as to to speak.
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Postby retrochav » Thu Dec 07, 2006 5:53 pm

Why not start with a gay/lesbian/bisexual support group or helpline. This way you can explore your feelings in a non judgemental space.

There are many gay/straight mixed bars in Brighton, and you can tell friends that you have a gay guy who you go with for support if anyone saw you. As a gay man i often meet girls in your shoes and i provide the perfect alibi!

You might be bisexual, you might be gay, you might even decide that the fantasy is fun but the sex isnt. Theres no rush to label yourself until you find what feels right.

As long as you dont decieve a partner, theres no harm in finding yourself before you open up to friends. After all what you do in bed is private, until you decide you want to make it another dimension to your life.

100% Gay and lesbian people have to come out if we want to live our lives freely. If we cant we have to keep explaining why we arent dating, marrying, or starting families.

Being Bisexual or Bi Curious, if your truely feel comfortable that way does at least give you the cover of being partially hetrosexual. Since your sexual partner is the only person who strictly NEEDS to know, you can safely explore yourself in ways gay people often cant.
whatever your problem someone else has been there and bears the scars.
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Postby Moose » Fri Dec 08, 2006 12:30 am

Hey, you're not on your own. Have a look at some of these similar PP topics:

I'm confused about my sexuality

Am I bisexual?

Just because you're known as a straight girl, it doesn't mean you have to be known as a straight girl - or a bi or gay girl - forever. What happened when you kissed these girls - was it all done as a laugh or something more serious and you just happened to be drunk? I'm bi/gay/depending on what day it is now and when I was 16/17/18 and all my friends were snogging each other for a laugh I couldn't do it, because I knew for me it was serious. What about the girls who you snogged - were they doing it for a laugh?
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Postby dappychick88 » Sun Dec 10, 2006 12:39 am

does anyone know of any sites where i can talk to lesbian/bi people? just so i can get a chance to speak to more people and lead on from there...

xxx
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Postby Moose » Sun Dec 10, 2006 10:55 am

This is the only one I know of.As you'll see, it's quite established and some people have got over 20,000 posts ( :o ) but there is a member introductions forum so you can just take it from there.
Last edited by Moose on Sun Dec 10, 2006 10:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby chat noir » Sun Dec 10, 2006 10:01 pm

Moose wrote:This is the only one I know of.As you'll see, it's quite established and some people have got over 20,000 posts ( :o ) but there is a member introductions forum so you can just take it from there.


I had 30,000 posts + on a forum I used to post on before it got closed down!

as for this problem..I used to think I was bi as I had never had a proper boyfriend and had been wondering about it for quite a while. I convinced myself I was bi for a while but then I got a proper boyfriend and all my crushes on girls just faded away, I still find girls attractive sometimes but I dont "fancy" them as before. I think maybe it was just because I hadnt tried it, it interested me. Still there's no rush, there's a huge gay scene in brighton from what I gather so you've plenty of time and oppotunity to experiment a little!
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Postby forever_in_love » Mon Dec 11, 2006 1:31 am

I wouldn't worry about this too much. I know easy to say huh? But when I was 16 I dated a girl for nearly a year so naturally thought I must at least be bi. Looking back i'm not so sure. I don't want to label myself and most people know know me think that was just a phase. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. I still find girls attractive but there was just something special about her. Gender somehow didn't come into it. Hope it works out for u. Just take things as they come and don't be too quick to label yourself. Good luck.xxx
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Postby lu310890 » Tue Jan 02, 2007 1:36 am

Dont worry yourself too much about it, i think most girls think about this sometime around your age. Lots of girls i know have experimented with other girls, I would do what you wanna do and what you like x
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