should i?

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should i?

Postby cecilia » Tue May 20, 2008 10:55 pm

i fancy my best friend. the thing is she doesn't know and i don't want to jeopordise our friendship. i can't get over her and usually in this type of situation i tell the person i like them and then if they don't like me i find it easy to move on.

i thought about writing her a letter but i don't want everything to be weird. we're really girly together and aren't shy about changing in front of each other or sleeping in the same bed. if i tell her i know all of this will change.

Any suggestions?
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Re: should i?

Postby suka » Wed May 21, 2008 6:20 am

cecilia wrote:i fancy my best friend. the thing is she doesn't know and i don't want to jeopordise our friendship. i can't get over her and usually in this type of situation i tell the person i like them and then if they don't like me i find it easy to move on.

i thought about writing her a letter but i don't want everything to be weird. we're really girly together and aren't shy about changing in front of each other or sleeping in the same bed. if i tell her i know all of this will change.

Any suggestions?


As all things you said, may be her also has the same feeling and you arent shy in front of each other, why dont you tell her about your feeling? If you dont tell her in time, you'll be regret afterward...

:D
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Postby Bel Bel » Wed May 21, 2008 11:49 am

I take it you are both girls?

Have you thought about asking her what she thinks about lesbians and lesbian relationships? Just the answer to this question may give you a clue to whether you can be mor than friends

The problem is when we are really close to someone we can often confuse love when really we are just great mates and get on so well
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Postby morris mouse » Wed May 21, 2008 2:58 pm

Bel Bel wrote: The problem is when we are really close to someone we can often confuse love when really we are just great mates and get on so well


Hello,"cecilia"

The best idea for you,with this,is to be very open about it.

Yes,it may mean that you lose a good friend,but if you don't ask
you'll keep on wondering!!!!!!!!!! 8) (SO confusing)

..........If you want to find out,go for it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Postby lilessexgal » Wed May 21, 2008 3:57 pm

if you dont talk to her about this it will drive you insane! also might leave you with regrets saying what if? etc
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Postby cecilia » Wed May 21, 2008 10:09 pm

thanks bel bel, i'll ask her. that's a really good idea.
yeah i really want to tell her. but i don't think i could face doing it face to face.
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Postby lilessexgal » Thu May 22, 2008 3:22 pm

there are other ways of telling someone something.

Phone call
Text message
Letter
Email
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Postby Bel Bel » Fri May 23, 2008 9:31 am

Just remember if you write it down and it all goes wrong she has that piece of paper to show other people
Only write down what you wouldn't mind others knowing
A phone call is safer and you can guage the tone of any reaction
Although face to ace would give much better clues to her response, I know it is scary but if she is shocked she could hang up the phone and leave you wiondering where your freindship stands and you both may be scared to make a move to make up
Face to face you can say if this isn't what you wnat I understand but can we still be friends
Bewar that she may feel less comfortable about getting into bed and stuff if you confess and she doesn't feel the same
Basically once the cat is out of the bag you can't put it back and you will have to deal with whatever fall out that brings
Of course she could feel the same and then you will have a whole other set of issues to deal with like if you are going to tell people
Sorry this all sounds so negative but just trying to warn you of the pitfalls so you can try and prepare yoruself
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Postby Moose » Fri May 23, 2008 10:42 am

I agree with Bel Bel, but if you do decide to take the plunge, you should go very slowly. I've been in your position a couple of times, and it can work out for the best, but as others have said, it could go very wrong, particularly if she takes offence.

Find out how she feels about that sort of thing first. Maybe say you think some famous girl is attractive, and ask her what she thinks. It depends what kind of conversations you have with your friend - you'll know how best to bring it up!

Good luck, and let us know.
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Well...

Postby Emslyx » Mon Jul 07, 2008 5:33 pm

Well, it seems that with the whole 'not being shy' thing, she may possibly feel the same. Don't hold me to this though as it may just be that she's comfortable around you. Maybe you should tell her, or ask what she thinks about lesbians and lesbian relationships, like was suggested before.
Good luck x
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Re: Well...

Postby retrochav » Tue Jul 08, 2008 9:21 pm

I feel this is a case of discretion being the better part of valour - in plain english, tread carefully.

Firstly, take a cold hard look at her. Can you be sure she shares your sexuality? She may well be curious, but could decide its not for her and where does that leave your friendship...or possibly be horrified at the thought.

I think that the other posts suggesting that you find out how she feels about women and sexuality would give you a good idea without committing to anything. If she appears keen, suggest that you are also open minded and see where it goes. Good luck
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