I really like this girl who has a bf, now she says she's bi

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I really like this girl who has a bf, now she says she's bi

Postby The Annonymous Potato » Fri Dec 11, 2009 5:39 pm

Basically theres a girl in one of my college classes, who I really like She'd be like the perfect girlfriend. problem was I'm a girl, and I found out she had a boyfriend. Straight? My Gaydar thought otherwise, but having been hurt one too many times by hoping girls with Boyfriends were bi, I ignored my gaydar as usual.

It really suprised me she had a boyfriend, because everything about her, her clothes, her hair, her voice, the way she walks, sits, everything said bi. I know, i know...it's just that usually if a girl has a boyfriend she's straight. So I put it to the back of my mind.

However, it didn't add up. The way she was around me, (i sit next to her) it seemed like she was intimidated by me, she didn't say anything to me for weeks. she seemed to be always on edge, and really self conscious around me. She was shy anyway, but after a bit she could talk to other straight people in the class, but not me,it was like I was diseased.

It felt a bit like she hated me, for no apparent reason. Or more accurately she didn't want to like me. I guess it's partly down to me too, I'm also pretty shy sometimes.

Finally, she realised she couldn't exactly go the whole year not speaking to me, but she was reallly nervous, and it seemed really forced.

But wierdly enough, recently she's a lot more comfortable around me, not totally, but niether am i to be honest, we get on a lot better, talk more naturaly etc.

And then tonight, our class went out for a meal, and she nonchalantly said that she was bisexual to our table.

do you think that explains why she was a bit off with me before? Why did she change? I'm not going to come between her and her boyfriend, but Should I tell her I'm bi? like casually.
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Re: I really like this girl who has a bf, now she says she's bi

Postby snail » Sat Dec 12, 2009 1:17 pm

It's impossible to say why she didn't get on with you at first - it could be down to sexual reasons, but it could just as easily be down to social or personal reasons. I don't see any harm letting her know you're bi. After all it's the truth, it's not like you're deceiving anyone, but her knowing it obviously doesn't automatically mean she'll leave her boyfriend for you, it just paves the way for something to happen if she wanted it to. Are you sure she doesn't already know, anyway?

I'm not sure I'd place too much faith in her declaration of bi-sexuality as meaning she would go out with a woman. It's been my experience that some girls, who are to all intents and purposes straight, like to boast that they have leanings towards women too, and sometimes even mention relationships they have had with women. However, these relationships are always way back in the past, so can't be validated, and in they never seem to actually date women in the present. I think some girls just do this to make themselves seem more sexy and unconventional, and for the shock value.
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