Well..I Seem to just keep having issues which I really need help on at the minute but anyway,
This year has been good and bad in places, met this lad in february really lovely and sweet, we hit it off really well I'd met him through two of my friends and as he was local I thought i'd meet him, I'm fully gay and came out with it but at this time none of my family knew so I thought yeah it's time to come out and say i'm gay so I told my mum and she met Gareth (the lad I was with at the time) and she liked him.
The relationship went on till we ran into issues, mainly because of alcohol, I'd think he wasn't exactly treating me right but maybe he was I really don't know as I was highly intoxicated anyway the relationship ended very badly, Another party at his and I went and spoke to his brothers girlfriend and admitted that me and Gareth had been having a relationship, she then convinced me that it would be the best thing to do if I come out and tell his mum as now as he'd apparently according to what I'd been told at this time, gone off with someone else a day after he'd split up with me.
Anyway his brothers girlfriend got his mum and I bottled out I couldn't say it I knew it would cause problems so before I could take her back and say no I don't think I should do this it was too late she told his mum and his mum now knows. The problem is he hates me now, I still love him as I always said I loved him but we don't talk that contact connection has been well and truly detached.
Just reccently one of his friends also mine after I told her there was many issues going on at home she told Gareth and he appeared to be concerned about me which has thrown me completly because I know that he's with someone else and I know he loved me and I know that I still love him and can't get over him I've just spent the last 3 months just putting a brave face on it and acting like he's not there when it's so difficult because he's at the same college as me!
I'm really not sure what to think now..has he got feelings..does he still care like I do with him and does he forgive me for something I didn't really do?
Please help me.
Sam