Lesbian and Babies?

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Should Lesbian have babies?

yes when the time is right?
20
91%
no, its wrong?
2
9%
 
Total votes : 22

Lesbian and Babies?

Postby x.hunny.x » Thu Aug 03, 2006 2:01 am

I am in a lesbian relationship and have been for over 16 months now. We've been engaged since xmas day 2005 hehe. My fiancee has two children who I love like my own. One day we would like to add to the family. Obviously there are sperm banks, doing the deed with a man :roll: etc I was just wondering on peoples opinions etc and if anyone know how you go about sperm banks etc??
Hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck & take care.
xXxxXx
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Postby psycho*jadey » Thu Aug 03, 2006 10:15 am

i think it's a great idea. you're obviously in a great relationship and there are already children involved so why the hell not?! me and my girlfriend have talked about kids sometimes. we're a bit young though :P but i'd say go for it
if i can see it then i can do it. if i believe it theres nothing 2 it.
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Postby x.hunny.x » Thu Aug 03, 2006 2:46 pm

Hiya Hun, cheers for the reply. Are you female too then? How old r u? We're not ready yet to have more but when the time is right we'd like to have one/some of our own hehe. I know some people dont agree with children being brought up in same sex relationships but at the end of the day its better for a child to be brought up in a loving caring same sex relationship than a vulnerable, violent/uncaring etc background. There are alot more same sex relationships now a days than there were a few years ago and I think people are now becoming alot more accepting. I just hope that it carries on getting better. x
Hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck & take care.
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Postby gatekeeper » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:12 pm

I'm not lesbian but if you think you're in a great relationship and are ready for kids then go ahead. Maybe ask both families, if they feel that you should go for it then just do it!. After all, you don't really need to care about what strangers(people who you don't know well but insist on interfering) think but what your families think.

Maybe don't do the deed with a man, try out the sperm banks. I feel doing it with a man is like cheating. I mean, if a man has fertility problems, they use artificial insemination not make the wife do it with another guy right?
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Postby Rogue » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:40 pm

There's no problem with it. If a loving couple want children then that's just super.
Definitely go with a sperm bank though. The other problem with letting a man father a child is that he would be the father and might want to be a part of the child's life, and would have a right to it. You don't want someone else involved in your family like that. Sperm bank donors have given up the sperm freely and won't ever be involved with your life.
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Postby x.hunny.x » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:47 pm

We have already asked both families. My partners parents say they would accept it as their grandchild and my mum cant wait for me to have one of my own. All the rest of my family and my fiancee's family are behind us all the way. If I did the deed with a man, it wouldnt just be me alone with him. It would involve my partner too. We have discussed it several times and we have found a willing male. Nothing is definate as not ready yet but just exploring all possibilities.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck & take care.
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Postby x.hunny.x » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:49 pm

The willing male has said that he'll do it with one condition, that we promise that the baby is ours (mine and my fiancee's) and that theres no threat of CSA involment with regards to maintanance. I do agree though that there is always a possibility of him saying that its his (even though he has made a promise etc) but then sperm banks are expensive, arent they?
Hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck & take care.
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Postby gatekeeper » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:51 pm

Just glad that you have the support of both families. I wouldn't recomend doing it with a man, like someone has mentioned, he might want to be a part of his child's life. He might not want to be a part of it at the time of conception but as we become older, we might change our minds right?
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Postby Rogue » Thu Aug 03, 2006 7:00 pm

I don't know if this is true, but you could research it and see if it works. I've heard that you can get a "donation" from a willing man and insert it with something like a turkey baster. Sounds weird, but a bit less awkward that having sex with a man you're not attracted to. If that really works, of course.
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Postby all_apologies » Thu Aug 03, 2006 8:04 pm

Yeah, there's no reason why you and your partner can't do the insemination on your own with your donor's sperm.

I'd recommend getting some legal advice though, to discuss adoption rights etc. This would prevent the possibility of the donor changing his mind about his rights to the unborn child, and would probably give you some peace of mind to have legal documentation.
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Postby psycho*jadey » Thu Aug 03, 2006 8:52 pm

x.hunny.x wrote:Hiya Hun, cheers for the reply. Are you female too then? How old r u? We're not ready yet to have more but when the time is right we'd like to have one/some of our own hehe. I know some people dont agree with children being brought up in same sex relationships but at the end of the day its better for a child to be brought up in a loving caring same sex relationship than a vulnerable, violent/uncaring etc background. There are alot more same sex relationships now a days than there were a few years ago and I think people are now becoming alot more accepting. I just hope that it carries on getting better. x


hey. yeah im female and im 16. i agree with what you're saying. more same sex relationships are stable and perfect for bringing up kids. hetro relationships can often be bad and abusive and god knows why children are even brought into that kind of atmosphere. and nowadays most people don't care about sexuality so it's getting better :)
if i can see it then i can do it. if i believe it theres nothing 2 it.
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Postby x.hunny.x » Fri Aug 04, 2006 4:45 pm

I've tried findin sperm banks on the net but not had much success. I've heard of inseminating it yourself at home etc. And funnily enough a hell of alot of people have suggested turkey basters lol just need to find a sperm bank now.........any ideas?
Hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck & take care.
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Postby The Lady » Sun Aug 06, 2006 12:05 am

There's no such thing as 'sperm banks' really, in the sense that there isa place where you can go and get some sperm for you to use! My partner and I had to use a sperm donor. You will have to ask your GP, what you are asking for comes under fertility treatment. The treatment may or may not be funded in your area, if you have to pay it will be around £500 per cycle / go, average or 3 or 4 goes. Have a look at the donor conception network on the net, lots of information on there, I believe it includes same sex couples and their experience of using donor sperm. Have a good look at all the information you can, have a good think, talk it over together, and if you decide to go for it, best of luck to you. After all the heartache (and all the cash we had to spend!) our daughter is here now and I wouldn't change a thing!

XXX
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Postby x.hunny.x » Mon Aug 07, 2006 10:59 pm

Fingers crossed then that our area of NHS wil fund it, otherwise its not going to be happening in the near future as that sort of money doesnt grow on trees :( oh dear. Why isnt there another way to have a baby ther than using mens 'stuff' lol why cant women produce it too? xx
Hope to hear from you soon.
Good luck & take care.
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Postby The Lady » Mon Aug 07, 2006 11:20 pm

Ha ha! It would have saved me some money!
Although treatment is expensive, so is having a baby, how someone so small can need so much stuff I don't know, but babies cost way more than £500, so maybe not the right time for you.

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