y do i still like him

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y do i still like him

Postby hara » Wed Apr 09, 2003 3:12 pm

i really like this guy. we have been friend for years and i have liked him for so long. every time i think im over him i just ending up liking him again. we are both 17, live very close to each other and attened the same church, we are good mates and have the same group of friends. I dont know how to get over him. Hes got a girlfriend and i know nothing will happen but i keep convinceing myself he feels the same and i know he does not. Please help
This isnt just a stupied teenage thing. I really like him.
:-) smile
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Postby evilmage » Wed Apr 09, 2003 8:45 pm

Yeh I know how you feel. Im in the exact predicament at the moment, and it hurts like hell.
Well...with me, when I decide he doesnt fancy me, something he does or says contradicts it, and it sounds flirty, so then I fancy him again, until the next time I convince myself that he doesnt fancy me.
If he has a girlfriend, hes off limits as far as youre concerned. Think of it as a barrier between you fancying him.
Also, you say that you think its a real thing about him. It probably is. But think about it. Youve known him for years as you say, yet nothings happened. This cant be coincidense. Im not trying to be mean or anything, but its not like he cant ask out girls or anything (as he has a girlfriend) so it must be that he simply doesnt feel the same way.
Its gonna take a long time for you to be truly over him, and it would do some good if you didnt see him for a while. Maybe go on a summer break with only one friend, who you can tell about this and who can help you see other people?
Then when you return, though your feelings wont have completely gone, they will have muted alot. You can only tell if youve truly gotten over someone once you see them and feel nothing for them (in a fancying sense).
Dont make it too obvious that youro avoiding him, and dont try to get your friends to avoid him too. Im afraid time is the best healer, but try and think of his bad habits that you really dont like. Maybe he has smelly feet or something. lol.
It could also be that your misplacing your feelings for him, not distinguishing the fact that you can love him without being in lovewith him. This make sense? I hope you sort this out!!
xXx evilmage xXx
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Postby Llisa » Wed Apr 09, 2003 11:23 pm

HI hun,
this is going to sound mean and I don't blame you if you blast me for this, but what you think is REAL love (this isn't just a stupid teenage thing) might not necessarily be it. I've had two boyfriends and both times I was convinced that this was the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I used to tell people the same thing, that this wasn't just another teenage romance, that I really did love the guy. And you know what? I think that I did love them, but it was more of a mate sort of love. Being young (17 REALLY isn't THAT old) really throws a curve ball on a lot of things, and you're going to think that you know everything, when you really don't. It's hard right now to see it, but more then likely, you'll get over him. And if you don't, then who knows? you might just get to be his girlfriend, but for right now, when he has a girlfriend and all, just back off and be his friend, and let him know that you're there for him. It's the best thing you can do.
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Postby danielle » Thu Apr 10, 2003 9:54 am

well i know how u feel cus i have like a friend for 10 years he lives over the road and i see him all the time and i even went out with him for three weeks and now i like him even more but do u what the best thing to do is find little things that u dont like and every time u look at him think of them things u never know it might work for u its working for me at the moment.
good luck!
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thanks

Postby hara » Thu Apr 10, 2003 11:20 am

thanks guys i know your all right the thing is i think i just need someone to tell my heart what me head all ready knows.
Thanks
Hope it all goes well 4 u guys in the same situation
:-) smile
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