Feel So Scared

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Feel So Scared

Postby cheap_uk_calls » Mon Apr 14, 2003 2:10 am


I am getting married in a July, and am deeply in love with my wife to be. We have been together for over 5 years, and she gets more beautiful every day. I am so lucky to have her.

My problem is this......
I have never been, or even contemplated being unfaithful to her at all. I have had plenty of chances because I am a Sales Manager and stay away very often. There is always someone available in every cheap hotel believe me! I have always enjoyed female company on a purely platonic (although flirtacious) level, and my wife is fine with this.

Anyway, I was on a course in November 2002 and I fell in *something* with another delegate. We got on extremely well all week, and there was definitely something there. We got drunk together, had a laugh together etc, but we were both in serious strong relationships and this was understood. We even spent the Thursday night in the same room and talked until 6 in the morning before falling asleep. (What a shock when I woke up!)

So, nothing happened but I haven't stopped thinking about her since. She left the company very soon afterwards, and we've spole on the phone a couple of times, but that's all. Anyway, my boss told me on Friday at our National Conference that this girl had left the company because she was happily married and I had been the first person that had ever made her feel the way she did.!!!

This now makes me feel worse. I am responsible for her throwing her career away AND she feels the same way about me as I do for her. Help!

I find myself in the strange situation where I feel like I'm back at school. I love two women!?!?!?

I know how this should end! Getting married in July to my gorgeous wife - but there is a yearning inside telling me to contact the other one! What do I do?
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Postby tammybligh » Mon Apr 14, 2003 11:09 am

I don't think there's an easy solution to this I'm afraid. All I can say is follow your heart. If you truely feel that you are meant to be with this other woman then you should contact her. Do you know if she's prepared to leave her husband for you?? If she isn't, then I'd put it to the back of your mind. But you've also got to ask yourself if it's all worth losing the woman you wanted to marry for... she must be pretty special to you... is she definately the one you want to spend the rest of your life with??

Sadly you're the only person who knows that. Have you got somebody who you could talk to about this, maybe a neutral friend.... sometimes it's better to talk it through with someone who knows you a little better.

I hope you make the right decision...
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Postby Bubble » Mon Apr 14, 2003 12:08 pm

I think you should stay with your wife-to-be and not bother dreging up the past.
Obviously this other woman didn't want anything to happen between you two otherwise she wouldn't have left and no longer be in contact with you. You may feel like you are stuck in a what if situation but i think it's for the best. If something had happened you may be thinking, what if i hadn't contacted her and was still with my wife!?
Just some food for thought.
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Postby Angelic » Tue Apr 15, 2003 2:21 pm

I'm with Donna on this one. There's no point ruining what you have with your wife to be as there is a pretty good chance you will regret it.

Leave the past in the past, thats where it belongs. Look to the future with your current partner.

A case of maybe the grass seems greener.....? forget about it and realise what you already have! Good Luck :D
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