Advice needed- things to consider when breaking up

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Advice needed- things to consider when breaking up

Postby dirty little secret » Sat Feb 07, 2015 6:03 pm

Hi Everyone,

I am planning to break up from my partner of 6 years. My decision is final and I know its going to be difficult for the both of us. But I need to sort out my own issue and he deserves someone who he can love and who will love him back. I love him as a person and he is one of the nicest person I've ever met and my life, and I don't want to hurt him by staying with him even though I do not feel anything for him romantically. Age gap didn't help either. There is nothing that will change my mind.

I wasn't born in this country, and some stuff I do not have any clue on how to handle. Which is one of the reason why it took me years before I made up my mind to split up with him. I am also dependent on him, so I will find it difficult to be on my own. I will probably feel lost at the age of 27! But I have to start somewhere. I just have some few question that I hope you can help me with...

1. Both of our names are on the rental agreement. If we split up, I cant afford to pay the whole rent, so I decided I will leave. Can I remove my name from the rental agreement, if I can, how? My name is also on the council tax with him.

2. I am planning to rent a bedroom near my workplace. What things I should consider or think about when renting a room? Like my rights etc.. How to choose a right place and landlords. What will they be asking from me etc...

3. How do I move? I can't drive, I dont have a lot of stuff. But enough to fit in a van. I think I am being thick here. Answer is obvious.lol

4. Any advice on how to break up peacefully or how can I make break up easy for both of us?

Guys, any advice, anything you say here will be much appreciated!

Thank you in advance!
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Re: Advice needed- things to consider when breaking up

Postby snail » Sun Feb 08, 2015 9:22 pm

I can help you with one or two of those.

Number 1, you will be responsible for the rent (on your own or together) until the next time your tenancy comes up for renewal. At that time, just don't agree to renew. When is it? You should plan to leave then, but your boyfriend needs some notice, as unless he can pay all the rent by himself he will also have to move out and find somewhere. Contact the council and tell them you are moving, and ask to have your name taken off the council tax register at that address. They will want you to re-register when you know your new address.

Number 3, hire a removal company or, if you really don't have much stuff, a 'man with a van' - someone who will carry things and transport them, usually with you helping. Try and get a recommendation from someone so you know the company can be trusted.
These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.

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Re: Advice needed- things to consider when breaking up

Postby dirty little secret » Sun Feb 08, 2015 9:47 pm

Thank you Snail, Unfortunately, our contract will end on Nov 2016. I don't think I could wait that long. I am seriously in danger of depression and on the verge of breaking down. I am not normally the teary/emotional type of person as i grew up taught to just "suck it up" every problems or challenges that comes to my life. But this time its getting me really stress and depress. i can not wait to be on my own to break free and start a new life and sort myself out. i am literally itching to get out of this situation Im in but i do not want to make a harsh move that I will regret.
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Re: Advice needed- things to consider when breaking up

Postby rufio89 » Mon Feb 09, 2015 10:11 am

That sounds like a very long lease, I've never heard of one being more than 6 months.

1. Basically, if you're signed into the lease then you're liable for the rent. Your options with regards to that are:

- If it's a property that's viable to share with a housemate, then find someone to move in with you or he can find someone to move in with him and cover the other half of the rent
- If he wants to stay there by himself it should be easy enough to take your name off the lease
- Speak to your landlord and ask him/her if he would be willing to terminate the lease early. Bear in mind that he/she is under no legal obligation to do so.

It's a difficult situation but unfortunately the law is not on your side with regards to the lease.

1b. Removing your name from the council tax should be as easy as making a quick phone call

2. What questions do you have about your rights? There's a number of websites you can go on (easyroomate, spareroom) where you can look for a room in a shared house. Everything should be written in your contract so you just need to remember that you're bound by the terms of the contract, whatever they are. They'll normally be with regards to deposits, upkeep and tenancy length.

3. You can rent a "man with a van" easily enough - it's usually around £50 for an hour, so if you're not moving far and you're very organised, you should be able to get the van loaded and unpacked again in 2 hours or so.

4. This I can't help with I'm afraid, but good luck :(
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