Still Cant Move On

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Rob01
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Still Cant Move On

Post by Rob01 » Mon Oct 24, 2005 5:08 pm

I still love my ex dearly and I really struggle to move on. :(

I have posted about this before but since then, I have been on a few dates and even had sexual relationships but they dont work out as I end it, despite my date wanting to carry on. Indeed, one particular date is now one of my closest friends and at the weekend she told me she had fallen in love with me. But I want my ex back even though that isn't going to happen.

I think about her constantly. She is on my mind 24/7. We are still close friends and still text each other every day. I met her watching our football team and at the match on Saturday (she sits in the opposite stand to me) she texted me 10 times during the game.

I love her and I miss her. There is no chance of getting back with her so that isn't an option. I cant move on. I need to move on. My heart is broken and I ache for her all the time. She is the first and the last thing I think of every single day.

:cry:

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V23
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Post by V23 » Mon Oct 24, 2005 6:20 pm

Sorry I'm not familiar with this but how long has it been since you broke up and why can't you get back together?

I do think sometimes it's harder to remain friends with someone we love, especially if there hasn't been a 'break' between the relationship ending and being friends.
I'm really sorry you're feeling like this...

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Post by madabz » Mon Oct 24, 2005 10:50 pm

awww poor babe...im choked :cry: have u tried telling her how u feel? there has got to be something their if u still txt alot...if u find out there is no chance of u getting back together then i think the best thing (i no this from experiance) is to get her out your life completely. you need proper closure. At first its hard...but trust me ya heart does heal after a while...then u are able to meet new ppl and not constantly think of her...its ok to think of her from time to time but everyday is just torture...the only way to end the torture is to not see her any more....its harsh but truexx

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Post by Rob01 » Mon Oct 24, 2005 11:03 pm

I have tried telling her but she doesn't reciprocate it. She has found someone else. She has even changed her name on MSN to "I'm in Love".

I am typing this at my computer virtually crying.

:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

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V23
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Post by V23 » Mon Oct 24, 2005 11:19 pm

I am so sorry.
I also hate to say it but I do think you're going to need to cut contact, even if it's just for a short while or else you're torturing yourself. If she doesn't reciricate but does still text you 10times during a football game I'm sure she'd understand you saying you need some time apart. I know it will be hard to do but I cannot think of anyother way that will help you get over this

Vanessa

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Post by JennaXXX » Tue Oct 25, 2005 10:57 am

I agree the only way you can move on from her is if you stop the contact. I know this will be hard because you still love her and want to spend every moment that you can in her company but you are only hurting yourself.
The sooner you stop spending so much time with her the quicker you will heal.

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Post by danielle » Tue Oct 25, 2005 11:10 am

babe i know all about this and you kow what i think you cant let go if she is still there for you to holg on to, put abit of distance between you both until you feel strong enough to be able to deal with a friendship with her.
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Post by kitten » Tue Oct 25, 2005 11:20 am

I have to agree with the others. You need a bit of space. I know how hard that is. But it will be for the best in the long run.

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T
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Post by T » Tue Oct 25, 2005 3:07 pm

Rob, i know how you are feeling believe me. I am in the same situation with a guy i have been on/off with for four years.
people tell us to distance ourselves but can you imagine your life without them in it?
It really is so hard, cant live with them, cant live without them.
I dnt know what to advise you of for the best hun! It does tear you apart!

Pm if you need me

*T*
Dreams do come true if you want them hard enough!

Rob01
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Post by Rob01 » Tue Oct 25, 2005 3:10 pm

T wrote:people tell us to distance ourselves but can you imagine your life without them in it?


Thanks T. You have hit the nail on the head there I think. I simply cant imagine life without her.

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V23
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Post by V23 » Tue Oct 25, 2005 3:15 pm

I can understand, I really can but can you seriously see yourself moving on when she's still around? Can you bear to see her with hew bf and still be her friend?
It's not even saying cut contact completely if you can't. Try doing it for a week or two, it gets easier.

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T
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Post by T » Tue Oct 25, 2005 3:21 pm

V, u r right. It does get easier but i think its more of a fact that u live with it rather than it goes away maybe hun, we have probably all been there too.

We all react differntly in these situations so perhaps the only person to help Rob, is Rob?

Its so difficult to have to deal with it cuz at the bk of your mind you are always going to wonder if she is going to come bk to u or what happens when they split up.

How did yo meet her if u dnt mind me asking?
Dreams do come true if you want them hard enough!

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Post by seksiclaire » Tue Oct 25, 2005 8:27 pm

hiya rob. this situation sounds very familiar. I was with my ex for 1 year n a half and he finished it by txt because he "did not feel the same anymore n didnt c it working out" i was devastated. Every single day for about 3-4 months i cried my eyes 2 sleep. When i was with him he used to fone me on a night before he went to sleep, and for ages after we broke up he used to aswell but he still didnt reciprocate the feelings i had for him towards me. ppl told me to turn me fone off dont let him contact me but i cudnt help it i waited n waited for him to fone me, i even used to go to his house wen he asked and still have sex with him for about 2 months after we split. I kno how you feel but eventually i came to terms with it (he cheated on me 4 times in the relationship) and i realised how badly i had been treated in the relationship and i started to get confidence and self esteem back and made myself feel better by goin over in my head how much of a tw@ he is. I never thought id get over him but 6 months after we split i met my current bf(known him about 3 years) and 1 year later wer still together. you do get over it i kno its impossible to believe rite it truly is but its the only way ur gunna feel better, turn ya fone off, dont reply to txts and start goin out with friends to take ur mind off it. i bet in 1-2 months time ull be postin on here tellin us all how much uv moved on and maybe met sum one else. Good luck hun xxxx

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Post by loopylou » Sat Oct 29, 2005 1:17 pm

Im in a similar situation Rob, me and my ex split up about 5 months ago and we are still in contact all day by text and still talk every few days by phone we are close and i see him every so often (it was long distance relationship but he still makes effort to come see me). So trust me i know how hard it is because i still love him and i want him back and i feel exactly the same way that you do, apart from i know he has feelings for me but the sitatuation at the moment he doesnt feel able to have relationship.
And deep down i know the best way to deal with this is to cut the contact but i simply cant, i really cant imagine being without him, if you can find it in you to cut the contact then id suggest doing that, its just i know i cant.
What are your texts like to each other are they just like friends texts or is there more to them? if theres more too them it suggests she may be giving you wrong signals because she likes the attention you give her..i wonder what her current boyf thinks about her texting you.
I cant really give any other advice pet because i dont know how to get through my own situation but i just wanted to let you know that your not on your own and i really do know how hard it is
Dont forget to keep smiling :)

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Post by Rob01 » Sat Oct 29, 2005 1:32 pm

On Tuesday, I asked her to cease contact with me until I am over her. She agreed though she didn't agree with me. She said she cared for my feelings.

I haven't contacted her since though an hour ago I got a text from her that started "I know you dont want me to contact you, but I am so excited..." and she went on to talk about football!!! She lasted just 3 full days. Three!!! I haven't replied but it is so hard. :cry:

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