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I thought he would have called?

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 10:42 am
by danielle
hi you may think this is not really a problem but i think it is ... anyway me and my boyfriend did it on sunday night but then the next day i thought he would of called but he didnt in fact he still hasnt called me but i phoned him yesterday and said that if thats all he wanted he should of said but then he said that just cus he hasnt phoned me in two days doesnt mean anythink . but the thing is it is really getting me down i have never had a real relationship i mean where my "partner" hasnt cheated on me or used me so now im worried im going to scare him off ? ANY IDEAS ?

we have been together for 3 weeks and have known each other all my life (im 17 ) but i really really really like him i have always liked him but i dont want him to think just cus i like him alot it means he can treat me like s**t.

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 1:02 pm
by tammybligh
The first thing you have to do is try not to assume that all men are bad. I realise that you've had some bad experiences, but don't let them ruin your chances of being happy with this guy. I think your boyfriend's right - just because he didn't call you doesn't mean that he's using you, he may have just been a bit busy, or maybe thinking about the situation.

Maybe you should try not to contact him for a few days... see how long it takes for him to get in touch with you. I know that it's a really hard thing to do, especially if you're really missing them - but at least you'll find out if he's missing you back.

If you really feel that this guy isn't treating you the way you want to be treated, tell him. Sit him down and talk to him about what you want from the relationship, and about your insecurities. The fact that you've known him all your life should make doing this a lot easier, mainly because he probably knows you a lot better than past boyfriends.

I hope this helps... I'm sure it'll all work out for the best, these things generally do :)

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 3:22 pm
by danielle
thanks for the advice but he just broke up with me :cry: :cry:
and its all my fault it always is my fault

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 3:36 pm
by tammybligh
Of course it isn't your fault... these things happen. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be, and it sounded to me like you were having doubts anyway.
He's been fairly upfront with you and hasn't strung you along. At least now you've seen him a new light you'll be able to get over him and move on... I know it's not as easy as that, and if it's any consolation, I'm in exactly the same situation as you right now, so I know it's gonna be hard - but you will get through this.

Don't give up though, all this just means that there is somebody better meant for you out there :)

Don't wear a frown, because you never know who might be falling in love with your smile!! I know it's corny, but it's a fair point...

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:22 pm
by danielle
THANXS but he lives over the road from me im going to see him everyday and i go to his sisters on friday nite and so does he ever time i see him i just want to cry althought i have only been with him 3 weeks on friday i have loved him since i can remember i thought my dreams had come true when he asked me out now i feel like it couldnt get any worse for me. he said he wasnt ready for a relationship but HE ASKED ME OUT i dont get it?

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:36 pm
by kitten
I may be assuming but teenage boys never know what they want.

It seems that sleeping with him triggered this, perhaps he has decided he is not responsible enough to have an adult relationship with you. Perhaps he wants to go back to being friends.

Try talking to him if you feel things will be awkard and ask if you can try and be friends again instead and work from there.

Sorry I can't be any more help.

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:45 pm
by danielle
he does still want to be friends but i feel like a pr*ck cus i fell for him big time and had it thrown back in my face like always

PostPosted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:50 pm
by kitten
I know how you feel a boy that lived up my road, suddenly decided he fancied me. We went out for a bit, but I won't sleep with him so he dumped and spread nasty rumours

Worse still I walked to school with a group of friends each day and he was one of the group.

Try and grin and bear it, these things have a way of working themselves out. I gradually started to speak to this boy again, although I don't see him now as this was five-six years ago. But it worked out in the end.

You have a head start as he is still your friend :wink:

PostPosted: Fri Mar 28, 2003 10:39 am
by danielle
he has spread any rumours about me he just wants to be friends .i have liked him for years but i have given up now i cant deal with it anymore so i have excepted that i will never have him EVER!
plenty more fish in the sea is what my mom says.

thank you all for your advice :P :D

im playin it cool with the guys for abit 8)

PostPosted: Sat Mar 29, 2003 9:45 am
by sophie
sorry to hear about your boyfriend, i think it is his age you know on maturity they are a couple of years behind us women. I also think it has something to do with the fact that he has know you for a lot of years, he is embarassed, not to be with you but because it has never been anything between you before.

He is very young and may not be ready for a relationship yet, use it as an experience, there is nothing wrong with you everyone has been there.

move on and keep smiling dont let him see that it bothers you, cry in private but not in front of him, hold your head high even though you dont feel like it, things will get better promise. :D