Work people problems :(

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Work people problems :(

Postby stressball » Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:44 pm

Hi All, I got a problem and not quite sure how to resolve it!!

Basically I'm 21, and have just started my 2nd full time job (the first one lasted for 3 years and I left because of the overworked/underpaid theory!!). I started in November last year and everything seemed great, hours were shorter, more pay etc.

In my dept there is a girl I chat to about the same age, we get on really well, then there is an older woman who bitches about EVERYONE, and it makes me feel uncomfortable, but thats a diff story, 2 x 30 yr old blokes and one older guy. Up to now I havent had that much trouble, occasionally listening to them witching about each other, which i've managed to stay out of up until now!!

What's happened is that because I'm new, both of the 30 yr old guys have been teaching me parts of their jobs to make their lives easier (which is why I was hired in the first place). Recently theyve been giving me funny looks and whispering (just like girls do!!) - bearing in mind the girl i sit with is exactly the same age, started same time as me, etc they absoltely love her to pieces, but with me its very different.

It takes me a while to learn new things and I was always told to "ask if you dont understand anything" - well I have done this and received a huff and rolling eyes, which then makes me feel bad, so in the end i try and not ask as much as poss!!

Then today, I was out of the room, but the girl i work with said these guys were witching about me, saying "im not being horrible, but the system was fine before she got here" and go quiet whenever i enter the room. Basically whats happened is since Ive been doing the work one of the guys decided to change it, and because I've taken that part of the job over I dont think the other guy likes it!!

What do i do?? Shall i confront them and say stop bitchng about me, say it to my face, etc and cause friction (which I hate confrontation!!!) or say nothing and look stupid?? I'm really upset about this because I thought they liked me :(

Sorry to waffle!!!!!! :( xx
Last edited by stressball on Wed May 12, 2010 9:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Raven » Tue Apr 22, 2008 11:58 pm

Hey, I'm sorry to hear your colleagues are behaving in a very childish manner. They should be going out of their way to help you as you are new and need to be shown the ropes. If they have a problem with your work they should at least have the decency to talk to you upfront and offer constructive advice.

It must be terribly awkward for you. If I were you I would approach them in a calm manner asking how you could improve upon your work. Remember they are acting unfairly, and by keeping your cool and not getting defensive you can be proud of not stooping to their level.

If this isn't possible, is there somebody higher up you can speak to?

Good luck x
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Postby miaow » Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:00 pm

Oh dear, how horrid. i think men can just be as bad as women!! I would have a quiet word with them both separately - in a nice controlled manner. Tell them your trying your best and you are hurt by what they have said. you have to all work together so is in best interest of everyone to get on. Make them feel guilty for being such pigs to you!

xxx
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Postby stressball » Fri Apr 25, 2008 7:59 pm

Hey Miaow & Raven,

Thank you two for replying, I did take both of your advice and spoke to one of the perpetraitors the next morning, I asked if he was unhappy with my work, he said no (It was mostly the other guy doing the witching!!) and that the other guy was frustrated as it was his project and was taking out on the nearest person (which was me as I was doing some of the work to help him out!)

He basically said he was sounding off but wasn't aimed at me directly. He was annoyed with me asking so many questions but he is the type of perso who will snap at people at the silliest thing, which I already knew!

He did say he thought I didn't need to bring it up with the other guy as It would cause un necessary friction, I havent, and It's been okay the rest of this week, although in the back of my mind I don't trust him obviously!

I hope this was the right thing to do?? The guy i spoke to seemed quite worried that it had affected me the way it had and even had words with the colleague who told me their conversation, asking if I was always that sensitive!!

Anyway thank you both for your replies, I hope I've done the right thing, fingers crossed!! :) x
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