Whats going on with her?

Maybe you have fallen out with your mate, or perhaps you are about to betray them - whatever it is, talk about it here.
Forum rules

Whats going on with her?

Postby xfayelouisex » Tue Oct 02, 2007 9:26 pm

My best friend is acting really weird and im worryed about her, i've been friends with her for such a long time and i've always been able to rely on her and shes always been able to do the same, on friday she(lise) was talking about moving out with me, my bf, and another mate of ours(loz) and she was showing me places and prices etc(we've been discussing this for a while now) anyway yesterday loz said her dad was moving out and did we want to move in with her and rent the place from her dad, lise refused, i thought nothing of it as i know she doesn't like loz's house, then i text her to see why she said no and she said she hates loz's house and it was to far away from the supermarket where she works, then she text me and said shecan't meet up with us anymore as she needs to save to move out into a one bed place in the area nearest her work(we all meet up twice a month) so i said to her what at all and she replied no because i need to save and i can't make it to your 21st birthday(which is on a saturday) as sunday overtime at work is too important, i was really taken aback by how cold hearted she was i don't know whats prompted this but i know her well and she would never comprimise her friendship, but ever since shes been sleeping with her boss at work, she wants to be there all the time because she wants to spend as much time with him as possible this is just a sexual based reletionship as he wants nothing more he told her this but she thinks she can change his mind, also on top of her obsessing about work all the time she's not eating properly as she thinks shes fat, she's dropped from a size 14 to a 8 in a matter of months i know the weight loss is due to the fact that earlier this year the love of her life left to another contry and said he wanted nothing more to do with her, and its hurt her so badly, we've all been there for her and she seemed to be getting better, then she started this thing with her boss, and she keeps working to much she is always at work she doesn't have time to herself, and she doesn't seem to have time for her mates anymore, which is quite hurtful, i know that work is important but im sure shes not thinking straight at the moment, she doesn't want to take a sunday off for work for my 21st even though sundays are optional for her, can't she spare one sunday? i have no job, and have so much debt, but i managed to scrape together to go out with her on her birthday, and get her a gift, i feel this may be trivial but i don't know whats happened since friday when we met up with her she was all up for the night out for my b day she showed me her outfit, and she was talking about moving out with us and looking forward to it, whats changed in 2 days? i'm unsure where to go from here.
mus:- i don't know much but i know i love you and that maybe all i need to know.
One of the Crowd
One of the Crowd
Posts: 61
Joined: Wed Mar 08, 2006 10:56 pm

Postby misskrystal » Tue Oct 02, 2007 11:43 pm

With the change in her behaviour being so sudden, I think there's probably something going on in her life which she doesn't feel ready to tell you about. It may be a sick relative, parents divorce, she could be pregnant..... The best thing you can do is to be there for her if she needs you and, if it turns out something has happened, just write off her behaviour as a rough patch in both her life and your friendship.

Give it a few weeks, if she hasn't got in touch or she continues to treat you badly, then you may have to let the friendship go, because this behaviour on a permanent basis is going to hurt you in the long run.
User avatar
Familiar Face
Familiar Face
Posts: 365
Joined: Fri Aug 12, 2005 7:24 pm
Location: Leeds UK

Postby Bel Bel » Wed Oct 03, 2007 4:10 pm

I think she is wrapped up in this relationship so much with the boss and your instincts about that are spot on. All you can do is tell her how let down you feel that she is not coming out as you only get one 21st birthday, if it were an ordinary birthday you might understand.
At some point this relationship with the boss is bond to end and I bet she will need you for a shoulder to cry on then
All you can do as a good friend is tell her you'll be there when she needs you but make this her only chance she can't keep doing this to you through life
Either that or cut her off but as you said she has bad self esteem issues and I don't think she is doing this deliberately to be mean to you and i don't think she will realise how badly she has treated you until she is out of the situation and can think clearly
The boss may have even suggested her getting a place near to work so they can pop there at lunch times for a quicky, she can't do that if she is sharing a place further away
Life is for living so live it to the fullest

Cheap Pandora Charms UK

User avatar
Bel Bel
Fully Fledged Flatmate
Fully Fledged Flatmate
Posts: 6758
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 1:58 pm
Location: Hertfordshire
Gender: Female

Return to Friends

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests