please help!

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please help!

Postby samsim » Tue Oct 23, 2007 11:48 pm

Firstly i apologise for the lenght!!!

ok, so in july i got married, my two closest friends from school had a part in my wedding, one was bridesmaid the other did a reading, it was a beautiful day. my new wife ( im a woman too!)lol (just thought i better clear that up) got on with my friends great as they her.
The problem is on my hen night i introduced them to my aunt, this was about what 15/16 weeks ago, my two friends and her got on really really well, it was great at first, we would see each other, but then they started seeing her without me and i felt as though i was being pushed out, to cut a very long story short, me and my aunt fell out (over something COMPLETELY different - family issues) so now its really really difficult because there friends with her, so today we all met in town, i was really looking forward to having a nice day shopping, girly with my mates as you do, (i work hard and am studying so dont get a lot of time, however when its school holidays i try to see them as much as i can) anyone we had lunch then went to one shop, and they turned around and said oh by the way we gotta go were meeting your aunt, and left me! they left me not knowing what the heck, i was so shocked, how can you treat someone you have been friends with for 11 years like that i just dont get it. i walked home crying, i have spend the whole day crying, i text my friends and they just dont get why im upset, they say that they had already planned to meet her but didnt know how to tell me, i tried saying if they had told me i would have understood i wouldnt have met them or would have but known, instead they left it till last minute. anyways i was talking to my aunt (not the one i fel out with) who went to see a physcic, (my friends mom) who started saying that ever since i got married i have alienated myself, thats so not true! im the first person to get in touch, if i didnt ring them i wouldnt see them, there alienating me!
i just feel that after 11 years, maybe one of them could have stayed with me whilst the other one went to meet my aunt, or they could have told me, im so upset i cant stop crying.
My question is............. should i just give it up?! i have other friends, just none ive known since i was a kid.. but are they really friends to just leave me there to go see my aunt.......... i just dont know, please help!
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Postby pink stripes » Wed Oct 24, 2007 12:05 am

hey :)

Ok well personally I think your friends are being a bit out of order here. My reason being that they shouldn't be alienating you - especially to spend time with your aunt - by all means they shouldn't feel as if they can't - ovbiously they are entitled to spend time with who they chose to do so but to alienate you in the process isn't very nice of them tbh.

As you say you do have other friends - but these are the ones you have known from a very early age - you've grown up with them.

So, I wouldn't give up just yet. I would invite them round for dinner - plan an evening or afternoon with just them and discuss how you feel about everything. They should understand and support you.

If things don't work out and they continue to alienate you then maybe they don't value you as much as they should.

take care --x
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Postby samsim » Wed Oct 24, 2007 12:10 am

ive tried talking to them, they just dont get it, ive spoke to them about how i feel about my aunt, they dont get that either they just say im being stupid, they dont listen, one is very care free and the other...... well she jsut..... i just didnt expect it from her.x
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Postby pink stripes » Wed Oct 24, 2007 12:14 am

ok well then (this may sound harsh so I really apologise if it deos) but maybe you are better off without friends like that

--x
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Postby Bel Bel » Wed Oct 24, 2007 11:05 am

I would cool it for a while
Ther ewas no need for them to kleave it til the last minute and leave you in the shops.
They should have been upfront in the fist place
I would start spending time with other friends and see if they bother to get in contact with you
Forget the physcic, she is a friend so could have known what was going on and read into it, not saying she is a fraud but could have misread things if she was already influenced by opinions and gossip
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