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Maybe you have fallen out with your mate, or perhaps you are about to betray them - whatever it is, talk about it here.
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Postby kitten » Wed Oct 24, 2007 10:40 am

I have registered on here and my school reunion is being organised through a group here so I have got back in touch with a lot of people I knew at school.

I had a very rough time there and am very wary of a lot of them to the extent my best friend has agreed if we are not enjoying the reunion we will head off elsewhere.

Now some people who have added me have not bothered replying to me and one friend who I talk to online seems to have deleted me from there.

Now I know sometimes computer errors cause miscommunication but these things make me feel bad and I wonder if its worth deleteing those that don't bother but then a lot of them I will be seeing again at the reunion.

Its silly that I'm still this insecure at my age or that my friends are still that immature at theirs!

Just needed to get it off my chest as yesterday when I saw one friend had disappeared off my list I got this really sinking feeling and having recovered from being depressed I wonder if this is not the best idea.
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Postby Bel Bel » Wed Oct 24, 2007 11:01 am

What is it you hope to gain from this reunion?
Is it just to catch up, in which case why do you care long term if these people are your friends
Are you going to show people how far you have come in life, jealous can show itself in a nasty way
You need to be sure your going for a reason that is likely to realistic in outcome
If it's worrying you that much do you want to go at all
What happens if your friend is having a great time and your not, you will feel guilty for dragging her away or she will not want to leave
Last edited by Bel Bel on Wed Oct 24, 2007 2:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Pwif » Wed Oct 24, 2007 1:39 pm

Kitten, you've got to decide whether you really want to go to your school reunion or not. If you're happy meeting up with school friends and chattering about old times and how people have turned out, great. If you prefer to put your school days behind you, because you think your life is much better now than then, and you don't want to rake up the past, don't go. There's no obligation on you to go whatsoever. The people you were at school with have probably changed considerably and you may not recognise them, and they may not recognise you (hence no response from certain people on facebook).

I was contacted about going to a school reunion for my year a couple of years ago. I wondered how everyone had turned out; what their family situation was like (kids, partners etc); also what sort of careers they'd taken up. I was almost tempted to go. Then I thought: I had a miserable time at school, and didn't have many friends there. The friends I had, I'm still in contact with. I wish the others well, but my life and personality is so different from when I was at school, I don't want to be reminded of those days and who I was then.

Do what you think is right for you. :P
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Postby kitten » Wed Oct 24, 2007 2:32 pm

Sorry don't think I was very clear in my first post.

I'm just going to the reunion to catch up with those that were nice to me and helped me when others were so nasty to me.

But what I was getting at is someone added me as a friend after we'd been talking for a while and has now suddenly deleted me off their friends list with no explanation. We'd talked about quite personal issues and I assumed we were fairly close.

The ones that have not replied have added me to acknowledge me but if I've asked what they've been up to some have not responded.

Think I just let things bother me too much when really I should let them wash over me - just wondered what people thought.

Your two responses are very helpful though. I wouldn't mind leaving on my own too much if needs be as its in my home town and my parents still live there. But I don't want the minority to interfere with catching up with the nicer people. Think I'm rambling now.
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Postby Moose » Wed Oct 24, 2007 8:17 pm

Hey Kitten,
I'm a Facebook addict too, and I think it's really important not to pay too much attention to the whole "friends" thing. People who I was never friends with at school have added me, and yeah, I have accepted them, even though if I saw them in the street I wouldn't bother to say hi (unless they did of course!). Have you checked whether this girl is even still on Facebook? When people remove their profiles, they disappear from your friends list. A couple of people on my list disappeared and it turned out they'd just removed their profiles.

They should call it your "people you know" list, not your "friends" list! Facebook is great for a laugh and great for keeping in touch with friends and throwing sheep and cows at people, but please don't let yourself be dragged down again by things that happen on this site. Also, remember that loads of companies are stopping people accessing Facebook now, so if the person on your list can't access the net at home or at work, she may have just removed herself.
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Postby kitten » Thu Oct 25, 2007 10:10 am

Ah thanks Moose think that sounds like a better way of putting it - people you know list.

He definately still has his profile as is on other friends list and still on my msn. Someone suggested perhaps his girlfriend didn't like me being on there as we had a fling years ago, we'd been friends first and after but to be honest back at school he wasn't the best of friends anyway.

I think I worry too much :lol:
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Postby SSSam!!!! » Tue Nov 06, 2007 12:58 pm

hello there, just wanted to say ur not the only one who feels this way!!! i am a nighmare if i add someone and they dont add me i feel really sad etc its hard not to take it personally!! i had a rough time at school too and weni look on facebook i c all the old faces that werent that nice when i knew them, i get down espesh wen i see my real friends on thier lists lol i'm not brave enuff to add them tho incase they say no so ure braver than me lol!!. mabye ur right about the girlfriend thing if shes insecure then she prob feels threatened by him havin u on his friend page, if u have history with him. as 4 ur reunion u shud go with ur head held get urself all done up and go enjoy urself! if ne 1 is rude or blanks u just blank em right back and talk to the people who are worthy of ur time n effort!! hope this helps!! :D
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Postby kitten » Tue Nov 06, 2007 2:23 pm

Thanks SSSam and welcome to PP.

I must admit there are some people I haven't bothered with as if I wasn't friendly with them at school I don't see the point.

There's not much history with me and the friend we were friends first and went out briefly for a few weeks then were back to friends. I was bothered at the time but to be honest now it's not bothering me so much.
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Postby whoopsie » Tue Nov 13, 2007 6:21 pm

I was actually setting up a reunion through facebook because loads of old school friends were adding me. I asked people to mail me to tell me when they weren't free. But when i arranged a time and place ppl were replying with maybes and I saw posts between a few of them saying 'I thought she was gonna work around when ppl were free'. I have given up now. I dont even think i would go. It was a novelty at first but now I still dont speak to any of them on there. And I dont even care!
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Postby Vickola » Tue Nov 27, 2007 8:29 pm

I think Facebook is the biggest paranoia- inducer ever! Do you have enough friends? Do the friends you have message you enough? Are they ignoring you? Do they think you're stupid because you've asked them to add a silly application? I have lost count of the number of friends (like proper, real life ones) who've got so paranoid from Facebook that they've deleted their accounts altogether! I say, if you stop enjoying it then stop using it, 'cos otherwise what's the point?

I have to say that if MY boyfriend got back in touch with a girl he went out with at school and they started getting really pally, I would probably object too, even if that seems a bit unreasonable. But then I am a rabidly jealous madwoman! :oops:
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