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Concerned for my best friend.

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2003 3:08 pm
by X_Smiler_X
My best friend has just got a new boyfriend, which I think she deserves, as she's gone through a rough time recently. But what she doesn't deserve is what he's doing to her.
I know that he has got a drink problem, he just can't handle it. Theres, maybe, one day a week when he's actually sober - the other 6 days, he's out getting drunk with his mates. My best friend goes along with him, but she doesn't drink much.
Anyway, bearing in mind he's a lovely person when he's not been drinking he turns into a total different person when he's drunk.
I couldn't believe it the other night, he'd been drinking since 4 that afternoon, and by the time we left the pub, it was about midnight, he was a mess.
He was falling into furniture, dropping glasses, swearing at passers by - he even went for a wee in the bush outside the pub, when there was a toilet indoors, then fell asleep in a bush!
But, thats entirely his descision, if he wants to make a prat out of himself he can, what I'm worried about is my friend.
When he was drunk on friday night, he shouted at her, telling her to f**k off, and that she was a b*tch, and not to contact her again. She was so upset by this but...the next morning, he called her asking to meet her...he couldn't remember nothing, not telling her to f**k off,nothing.
He's like this 6 days a week towards her, I dont know what to do.. please help.

look ...........

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2003 5:48 pm
by Dave_1976
Your best mate is better off without this bloke by the sounds of things, so get your best mate just to f... this bloke off, and then get her to find a bloke that is decent and genuine, there are plenty of blokes out there that will treat girls right.

Sam Mcmahon
Welwyn , Hertfordshire

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2003 7:21 pm
by starrie
He sounds like he has a problem and your friend should get out just now early before it gets too much.
You just need to continue being there for her as a friend and maybe get her out when he gets that way to stop possibly anything bad from happening.
Take care
S x

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:35 pm
by X_Smiler_X
I'm always there for her, but thats besides the point. She knows full well he has a drink problem, but I think she is scared to finish with him.
Me and her went out this evening, when he called her mobile asking to meet her, she agreed and asked me to let her have a chat with him. She told him that she feels he turns into a totally different person when he's drinking, and basically he treats her nastily and says horrible things. He was really apologetic, and says he doesn't mean anything he says when he's drunk.
I just dont understand why she's being so soft with him. I mean, if I was in her shoes, he'd be long gone. Who'd want to be with someone who is getting drunk every night, throwing abuse at them, then getting up in the morning not remembering what he said?
I'm really worried about her, i'm scared he could turn to her next and hit her or something.
She likes him ever so much, but to be honest I dont think he's all that interested. He only seems to be interested in her when he's drunk...when he's sober, he hardly touches her.

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2003 11:02 pm
by sovs
And what if one night he turns around and hits her, will she forgive him because he was drunk?
Mental abuse is just as bad as physical and no one deserves it.
People like him never change. Your friend is vunerable if shes had a bad time lately and probably thinks hes the best she can get.
Take her out, and agree before hand not to meet up with him, say you want a girls day out. Go out and show her the fun she can have without him.
I dont know where you live but Thorpe park or Alton towers is a good day out, and theres always buses this time of year :wink:

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2003 11:15 pm
by X_Smiler_X
Exactly, if she lets him off for calling her all the names under the sun, is she going to let him off for hitting her?? Quite a likely chance if you ask me! At the end of the day theres not alot I can do, it's her choice.
I think I just might do that, fancy Altin Towers actually. Cheers for the advice! xxxxx

PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2003 10:24 am
by misatok11
Just to let you know we don't reccomend chatting off the forums as it is unsupervised and others can't help.

PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2003 11:01 am
by X_Smiler_X
What do you mean?

PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2003 12:34 pm
by misatok11
The whole point of the web page is a place to help people out with their problems and try to find a solution. Chatting on other messengers the moderators can't help out with anything that has been said.

PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2003 12:39 pm
by X_Smiler_X
Oh yes, got ya!