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bestfriend problems

PostPosted: Wed Aug 27, 2003 8:15 pm
by opi

My bestfriend, 19, seems to be always looking for a father figure in her sexual relationships, but she says this is mainly because she wants security.

Relently she met a man who is 42 who already has a girlfriend of 4 years. She's fallen in love with him and they have done some intimate things together and now she doesn't know what to do.

Please could you give me some advice on how to help her with her situation.

PostPosted: Wed Aug 27, 2003 11:39 pm
by winnie3n
Hi there

Difficult this one.

Is there a reason why she is looking for a father figure? If there is, then maybe you need to talk to her about it.

With regard her seeing the 42 year old who already has a girlfriend. Talk to her about it. You need to discuss whether the relationship has a future with her and get her to look honestly at how she thinks this guy feels for her.

If he already has a girlfriend, then the chances are that she doesnot know what is going on and this could get into a sticky situation for all concerned (I should know).

You can only talk and give her advice, and that depends on what she says to you.

Hope everything resolves itself.


PostPosted: Thu Aug 28, 2003 12:03 am
by sovs
Age gaps dont bother me, its the fact she wants a father figure thats concerning.
I think you can only really be there for her and support her.
If you try telling her shes making a mistake it will just cause arguments just be there and try to be understanding.

Your a good friend to be concerned.

Sovs :wink:

PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2003 2:04 pm
by ktmcg
i think the problem with this situation isn't the age gap, it's the fact that he already has a girlfriend of four years.
it looks as though because he already has a long term relationship she could get hurt.
and if this isn't what she wants then she should get out now.