my ex is harassing me

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my ex is harassing me

Postby Britgirl » Tue Jan 06, 2004 8:51 pm

my ex has been aksing me if we ever have a chnce of bin together agian when he knows i am in a very long term relationship. He keeps calling me up and saying he misses me even though we broke up over a year ago. ihave told him that i dont see him like that no more and i dont want to be anything more but friends but he wont take a hint. how do i get him to leave me alone. he texts me all the time and gets angry when i dont text back. hes beginning to frighten me because he can be quite threatening when hes angry. help me
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Postby cheese100 » Tue Jan 06, 2004 9:01 pm

try saying that he can see you just with your boyfriend too,hes part of your life now and your ex cant do anything about it.if he turns nasty your boy will be there to protect you.This may seem cruel but his got to relise your not together and your happy so he can move on.cheese xx
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Postby saz » Wed Jan 07, 2004 7:47 am

Maybe a quiet word from your boyfriend to leave you alone would help. Tell your boyfriend about it but dont get him to do anything silly, just ask him to leave you alone. My boyfriend had to do this with my ex because he wouldn't stop calling. He just said it was upsetting me, that we were together and that wasn't going to change - we never heard from him again.

Dont reply to his messages because this is what he wants. If he phones dont answer and dont feel bad for doing this you have told him the score, it is his problem that he doesn't want to listen. Thing is you are getting dragged into his game and making you feel bad is working but the more you keep talking to him, the more hope he has of talking you round. Be firm with him and if things get nasty dont hestitate to call the police, his parents or tell your friends.

He will get bored if you dont reply, meet another girl or give up when he realises you aren't interested.
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Postby Enigma » Wed Jan 07, 2004 2:59 pm

I have experience of this situation through it happening to a friend. I recommend you get a new telephone number and give that number to people you trust not to give it to your ex. If you are being called at work let any reception staff know about the situation, so that they can terminate calls before they get to you.

My friend had found her ex calling her direct line at work about twenty times a day. If you can see the number you are receiving a call from then answer and immediately hangup or if at all possible then reject the call. If you are being called on a landline home number, you could contact BT about extra resources on your phone line.

Where can I find advice for dealing with malicious calls?

Choose to refuse service

From Choose to refuse:

Choose To Refuse is a quarterly rental service which enables a customer to bar the telephone number of the last incoming call, following termination of the call. Up to ten telephone numbers can be stored in a personal data store which can be accessed using a PIN (Personal Identification Number), to enable the customer to review, add to, and edit the information held.

The service allows customers more control over their incoming calls and may be useful for recipients of malicious or nuisance calls.

For more information call us on Freefone 0800 169 2707.
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Postby jasperlens » Sat Jan 10, 2004 12:16 am

It may seem a little harsh but if you feel threatened by your ex`s behaviour you should report it to the police so at least they have a record of it. there are also court orders.
Maybe he wants your new b/friend to do something so he can get at you that way.
This sort of thing can become serious in time if left.
He may be jealous....who knows. This type of situation with the phone calls happened to me a while ago. I didn`t change my number as I wasn`t `giving in`.
Hope things work out for you.
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