Not friends but enemies

Maybe you have fallen out with your mate, or perhaps you are about to betray them - whatever it is, talk about it here.
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Not friends but enemies

Postby daveshow » Tue Jan 27, 2004 3:58 pm

not really about friends but enemys there is this guy in skool who thinks he is a hard man and is spreadin rumors about me an my m8s i have got him back tho and i aint scared of him but i am worried about wot this ahs done to the realationship between me and my best m8 coz he is very popular and every1 lyks him i am not unpopular or anythign just not as popular as him tho but every time i tlak to him in skool he looks sad and as if he doesnt want to talk 2 me tho outside skool hes talky n that can any1 tell me y he may be doing this coz the rumors never really affected him only me and my other m8
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Postby worstfriend » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:16 pm

Can i take a wild guess and ask if this enemy has been spreading rumours which throw your sexuality into question?

If so then your best mate is probably a bit paranoid about being associated with the rumours, even if they didn't affect him directly.

I think you should try and talk to your best mate, out of school, when he's relaxed. Tell him you're hurt by the way he is blanking you at school. You have every right to expect to be treated well by your mates.

I could be wrong about the topic of the rumours, but i seem to remember homosexuality being the major topic of rumours both true and false when i was at school. In a few years everyone will begin to grow up and realise that everyone has a right to be happy, whatever their sexual preference is. The bravest thing i ever saw at school was one of my mates walking into the senior common room and telling everyone there she was gay. The rumours had been killing her so she went and killed the rumours. It was very inspiring.

The bottom line is that your mates should stick by you, no matter what, and should know to talk to you rather than belive nasty childish rumours.
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Postby daveshow » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:28 pm

youre rite they said we bum each other and stuff lyk we play cowboys and indians up the hills just coz we went for a walk up them 1 day i asked him if he was embaressed by me and he said no i dunno wot it is he doesnt exactly blank me but i usally make conversation with him if anything in skool and he never looks happy when i am there
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Postby worstfriend » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:36 pm

If he's really popular, he probably seems really confident to everyone, but possibly inside he's only too aware that he could stop being popular anytime, and that worries him. From what you say it sounds like he's torn between liking you and wanting to speak to you, and doing what the others who respect him (but don't know him as well) want. In my experience the people who are genuinely popular were never that popular at school, because at school it's about doing what everyone thinks you should do.

I think you should try again to talk to him about it, out of school, maybe on a weekend. If he really won't talk you might just have to accept it, but don't assume he's shallow because he is acting like this. Maybe he's worried about his own sexuality, or frightened that an even worse rumour is about to be doled out about him.

Part of growing up is learning to stick by your beliefs and defend your mates, even when they are getting stick from other people. I don't know how old you all are, but i remember 14 and 15 being particularly insecure years.

If it's any comfort to you, i'm sure this will be forgotten by next Monday, until then, stick to your guns and keep trying to talk to your best mate.

Hope this helps

WF
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Postby Fidel » Tue Jan 27, 2004 4:39 pm

I agree. In the long run it's going to be him that appears stupid. Just ignore it and no-one will think anything of it
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Postby daveshow » Tue Jan 27, 2004 6:41 pm

kk thanks 4 repling c about teh rumors although they were said about us all its really only me that they have affected so he shouldnt be worried i think he is worried that if he talks 2 me ppl will start to not lyk him do u think that could be the prob?
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Postby luvva » Tue Jan 27, 2004 7:09 pm

Yeh I suppose that could be the problem, could you talk to this friend maybe and ask him why he is acting different.
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Postby cheese100 » Tue Jan 27, 2004 8:31 pm

hi
If this guy is thinking of his own popularity over his friend I do not think you should be friends just explain how you feel about it and try to sort things out between you.Relationship friend included need two ppl to make it work so if he inst making the effort than maybe its not worth keeping.cheese xx
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Postby daveshow » Tue Jan 27, 2004 9:15 pm

i suppose ure rite but ano it sounds reely gay (which i am not)but i really care about him
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Postby smile » Wed Jan 28, 2004 9:12 am

To say you care for someone does not sound like you're gay. It might do you both some good to talk about things openly and find out how he feels about your friendship.
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Postby saz » Wed Jan 28, 2004 10:03 am

I really hate these rumour problems haven't people got better things to worry about hey? This is the way you should be thinking, that you have better things to worry about than their imature rumours, and any true friends will also do the same.

I went to an all girls school and if you were really close to another girl, the rumours would start about you having a relationship or something. It was so irritating and it makes you feel like you cant be nice to your mates or anything.

The one problem with being friends with someone popular is that you get lots of jealous people. They might want to be good mates with this guy and dont like it that you are! When you are the popular person it is hard to stand up to people you worry that they will just think it is true. You and your friend should just carry on being mates and try not to let them bother you. In time there will be something else to worry and talk about.

Good luck i hope things work out for you.
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Postby daveshow » Wed Jan 28, 2004 4:47 pm

i agree with you all but its this guy he keeps acting likes hes cool all the time i mean he hit me on the head with a snowball 2day i wouldnt mind but he done it out of spite and he keeps useing the same stupid slaggings which are rubbish and i kick his ass with return slaggins i just really want to hit him but hes bigger than me i was dam close to picking up a table 2day and breaking his skull in tehre was somthing stoping me though and i dont know what i dont even know how any of u can reply yo this as it dont make sense i am just getting so anrgy and need to tell people
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Postby Fidel » Wed Jan 28, 2004 6:52 pm

well good for you. Humour is a gret defence
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Postby cheese100 » Wed Jan 28, 2004 8:35 pm

its not gay at all you've known him for a long time and should care.hope you can sort things out.cheese xx
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