How do i tell her

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How do i tell her

Postby ckeeko » Wed Jan 26, 2005 4:06 pm


My friend recently lost a baby and it had died at six weeks but didnt know until later on in the pregnancy and she is devistated and has asked me not to mention my sister inlaws pregnancy, so i respected her wishes and havent mentioned anything at all.

We went out last week and had a great night having a laugh and a joke, but the next day i found out that i am pregnant aswell.

i am around 6 or 9 weeks pregnant and apart from worrying and keeping my fingers crossed for my baby and hoping everything goes ok in the next few months i am worrying about my fragile friend, how on earth do i tell her that i am pregnant so soon after she lost her baby, do i wait till ive had my scan so i know everything is ok with the baby or do i tell her now before shes hears of someone eles in the family?

C x x x
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Postby lilessexgal » Wed Jan 26, 2005 5:46 pm

well i think it is best to come from you because if she over hears it from someone else you she might get upset that she didnt hear from you and that you kept a secret from her! its up to you when you tell ehr but i think sooner rather then later or else as you say she might hear from someone else! dont worry hopefully she will understand!
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Postby Rock_Queen » Wed Jan 26, 2005 6:10 pm

HI, well she may be upset about this but she has to move on. She can't escape pregnancy and babies. This is going to be hard for her, she may not want to hear it but this is very important to you, and you are her friend. In any other circumstance she would want to hear about it.

I suggest wait until your scan, when the baby is healthy and everything is ok then you should just give her a call (as this may be a bit easier for her and you) in time she will come to terms with it. In a way this might be a way for her to move on. Hope this helps :)
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Postby elmo24 » Sat Jan 29, 2005 4:04 pm

Well congrats matey! Hope you're feeling well. I think that obviously you don't have to talk about it 24/7 but telling her is definitely not a bad idea - as Rock_Queen rightly points out, she's gonna come across pregnant women and babies, and at the moment she'll probably feel like they're everywhere.

I don't think it'll make much difference whether you tell her now or when you've had your scan but if you wanna wait til after, fair enough.
she might feel sad now but what has happened to her is not uncommon in first time pregnancies - reassure her that her next try will more than likely be absolutely fine. tread carefully but do involve her - she's still your friend :)
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Postby JennaXXX » Tue Feb 01, 2005 1:32 pm

I can understand why you are worried about telling her and I think its really sweet that you care so much about her feelings.
Tell her whenever you feel ready. Definitely tell her yourself she will not appreciate being told by someone else.
You cant hide this from her and although she may feel sad at first I am sure that she will be happy for you.
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