frustrating situation

Maybe you have fallen out with your mate, or perhaps you are about to betray them - whatever it is, talk about it here.
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frustrating situation

Postby _Pixie89_ » Wed Feb 16, 2005 6:17 pm

iv had this best m8 for 14 yrs now and now she's saying to all my friends not even to me that she cant trust me with anything any more. this has come out of the blue to me. im getting really depressed because i've got so much work to do and so much stress lately its unbelievable. she's having a go at me saying its all my fault when i didnt even know anything was wrong between us, she's saying im leaving her out of everything when SHE'S been leaving ME out of everything. i dont think that it's fair im gettin the blame for everything that goes wrong in our friendship because it's not all my fault.
i dont know what to do about it i really cant handle this for much longer, iv even started my old habits of making myself throw up and starving myself lately cause i cant handle this.
please help me
sarah
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Postby lilessexgal » Wed Feb 16, 2005 6:26 pm

firstly i would say dont blame yourself because by what youve said you have done nothing wrong! dont punish yourself byt making yourself throw up and starving yourself that is not a good way with dealing with it and will get you no where! probably have but have you tried telling her exactly how you feel stating that you feel left out and if she thinks the same but the other way round if you get what i mean then couldnt you come to an agreement to be more good friends and go out with each other more often!? sorry dont think that makes much sense!
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Postby SugarRainbows » Wed Feb 16, 2005 6:33 pm

Yea lilessexgirl is right, you shouldnt punish yourself for this when its not your fault, especially when you dont know why shes being this way.
You should speak to her about how you feel, maybe there is something else going on with her which is making her feel this way and she just needs someone to be close too. Maybe you could organise to see each other once a week on a regular basis or something and agree that certain days are for work only. You should let her know shes still your friend and she can ring you anytime she likes, but she should make an effort into your friendship too otherwise its not fair on you. :)
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Postby Laurajane » Wed Feb 16, 2005 11:24 pm

making yourself throw up is something you can control right? You can't control whats happening with your best mate because you haven't done anything wrong, and your work is piling up. they are right though- your punishing yourself when its not your fault- is there anyone you can talk to, perhaps? Because if work is piling up maybe something could be done to relieve a bit of the stress?

How about you try telling your friend exactly what this rift is doing to you- i'm sure she wouldnt be so hestitant to blame you for it?
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Postby just_me » Thu Feb 17, 2005 1:19 am

tell your mate how you feel, if she knows how bad she is making you feel then maybe she will change her behaviour towards you
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Postby _Pixie89_ » Thu Feb 24, 2005 7:51 pm

everything's ok now :) we've sorted everything out and now we're better friends than we were before! thanx for helping me :)
saz x
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