grass is greener

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grass is greener

Postby Raven » Wed Mar 02, 2005 9:47 pm

for some reason, i always seem to be ungrateful for what i have. i have 4 close friends - a few years ago i had nobody because my pals ditched me to become slappers and smoke and drink. but i was so happy when i finally got these friends, and had lots of laughs and stuff... but now i end up despising them over the pettiest things, like if they make a small comment i take it the wrong way.

i look at these people at my 6th form, and feel really envious. they always seem to be having a laugh, and seem to be quite carefree. i don't have many friends that are boys and i am envious of that too as there are tonnes of boys in their group. sometimes i wonder why theyre friends with the girls in their group because they seem to be personalityless(different point but anyway)...and i wish i could be mates with them. they're all popular and have loads of mates, and i just end up feeling like a geek with my friends.... becoming friends with them is out of the question really, my friends dont like them for a start, and also i have no real reason to strike up a conversation other than "yeah, im well jealous of you lot. can we be mates?"

i don't know why i always think the grass is greener on the other side
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Postby saz » Wed Mar 02, 2005 10:28 pm

Hiya. Well i dont have an answer to your question, maybe some suggestions. Perhaps this is just part of your youth, the culture of school and the main fact that you dont feel you have gelled with anyone in particular. If you were close to people genuinely then you wouldn't feel this need.

School is a difficult place because you end up in groups of people and you dont really know why. I had some lovely friends at school who left before 6th form and i ended up being in the most popular group, which from the outside was really good. But they were really shallow, obsessed with clothes, hair etc, and then paired off with boyfriends leaving us all in the dust. I wished i had formed closer friendships with the genuine people but i had chosen popularity first.

I think you just need to be with people who you actually like regardless of their status and get to know them. Give back what you take in friendship too, and hopefully for the rest of the term you will feel better, but remember that after school you dont have to see them ever again if you dont want to.

Basically with regards you wondering about why they are all friends then it could be that they too are all pushed together and have just found a friendship that works for them.
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cos i'm in love with the inner being
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Postby Lorelei » Fri Mar 04, 2005 9:58 pm

saz wrote:remember that after school you dont have to see them ever again if you dont want to.

When you finish school, you will probably be moving on to a career, or university, and you will have the opportunity to meet lots of new people. It seems like you're envious of people that you were initially eager to avoid. In the future, maybe you should try not to put yourself in a particular group, or cut all ties with friends because you don't want to to what they're doing. It's important to have all different types of people in your life, and it doesn't mean you have to go along with everything they do. Try to accept and embrace all of the friends you meet, throughout life. Then, if you want a quiet chat, you'll have someone to chat with, and if you want to go out, have fun, and meet boys, you'll have someone to do those things with. Perhaps the four friends that you do have would be open to trying some new, more sociable activities, if you suggested it?

Lorelei xxx
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Postby JennaXXX » Tue Mar 15, 2005 4:02 pm

I didn't really feel like I fitted in at school but when I joined Uni it was a different story.
Just because you feel you dont gel with anyone much now doesn't mean that it will always be that way.
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