MOVING ABROAD/CHILD/MOTHER

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MOVING ABROAD/CHILD/MOTHER

Postby worrylots » Fri Aug 17, 2007 5:07 pm

Hi,
Myself & my daughter are wanting to move to US. I have so many guilty feelings about this I dont quite know where to begin. Anyway Im going to try to keep it simple.
We are moving away for the right reasons, to get remarried, have a stable loving home,life and fantasic life & opportunities for my daughter. But Im an only child and Im leaving my Mum. She is 81 and will find it hard to look after herself. She thinks I should go and she see this as a brilliant opportunity for us and thinks that we should take it , I have asked her to come too but she does not want to. She has no other close relatives and there is only me.She is disabled also So, what should I do? Should I go or should I stay until.... well you know. I cant bear to be away from my partner for any longer( this has been going on for 2 yrs) and he cannot come here. She has said just find me a little house and come and vist me when you can.... it make me feel so sick to leave her.
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Postby morris mouse » Fri Aug 17, 2007 7:26 pm

worrylots wrote: I cant bear to be away from my partner for any longer( this has been going on for 2 yrs) and he cannot come here.


Well,after reading your problem,I can understand why you're moving
to the US. :)

As you say,you're moving away for the right reasons, to get remarried, have a stable loving home life and fantasic life & opportunities for your daughter.

And,yet,the move you make,is tinged with sadness,re:your mother :(
I can understand this,and,it's very considerate for you to do,also.

However.........

From what I can see,your mum doesn't want you to be sad about this
[indeed,she has given you her blessing :D ]

So,go ahead,& make the move........
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Postby cliff » Sat Aug 25, 2007 2:18 pm

Hi worrylots,
What i tend to do is always put myself in the situation. Imagine if it was you that was 81 and your daughter wanted to move away what would you do and say ?

I know it's hard but if it was my daughter i would tell her to go for it and would not like her to stay for me, as unkind as this may sound I would have had a high percentage of my life yet my daughter would be just venturing on hers and would want her to follow her heart.

What ever you decide i wish you al lthe best !
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Postby worrylots » Mon Aug 27, 2007 6:58 pm

Thanks for that, it makes me feel much less guiltyxx
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Postby Bel Bel » Mon Sep 03, 2007 10:27 am

Go but make sure you ring her all the time, write to her and send her pictures of how you are getting on.
Also get your daughter to send her drawings,postcards and letters.
Just imagine how good it will feel when the post arrives and she has all these special things arriving.
Make planned dates to come back so she knows when to expect you and has that to look forward to.
I think you are more likely to have more guilt ...when you know.
But I agree with the others your mum wants this for you and as long as you keep in touch loads she won't feel this gaping hole in her life
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