I need help with my appearance

[too many problems]

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[umistgirl]

Aww sweetie,

At 7.5 stone you will most DEFINITELY not have big thighs!! It's almost impossible. You sound very pretty from the sounds of it. You might think that looking young is a disadvantage but honestly, you will be thankful of it when you are older. Not just because of the whole 'you'll have less wrinkles' cliche, but looking older often projects you into a world that's not meant to be entered into yet.

I looked older when I was in my teenage years and as a result got older boyfriends (who were no good for me), I was able to go into pubs - so i did (that didn't do me any favours either). There are a lot of things about that era that I now regret. I just wished I'd lived as a kid and had been allowed an appearance to match.

You sound very petite and feminie and a lot of women would love to be like that (me for one!). It sounds like you have nothing to worry about. If you want to change the way you dress, perhaps just add in some different colours, you say you always wear purple and black? try adding in some lighter colours- perhaps some blues or pinks? if you're not brave enough yet just add accesories. I had to wean myself of dressing in black all of the time a la Davina McCall, but now I love wearing bright colours- it just takes some getting used to.

Chill out- you sound fine

p.s. if you post a pic in the pic thread we'll all be able to tell you how pretty you really are!

[smile]

Hey there,

It's sooo easy to list all of the things we don't like about ourselves, in fact I think every single person on this forum could produce a huge list of their own! But what is important to do is to also list the things that you like about yourself. It sounds like you're lacking in confidence a bit, if you start to feel more confident this will most likely change the way you feel about yourself which will in turn change the way you dress, your attitude etc.

Umistgirl has made some really valid points above and I agree about buying clothes in colours that you wouldn't normally buy. As for make up, if you don't often wear make up but want to then maybe you could start off simply with wearing a bit of black eyeliner and some mascara? Often subtle make up has the most effect.

To me you sound like a very normal person!! As I said everyone has features they don't like about their appearance so don't worry too much.

[too many problems]

Thanks for the advice
I already wear dark grey eyeshadow for normal things like going shopping, and eyeliner and mascara for more special occasions.

Me:

http://img356.imageshack.us/img356/851/ ... 3pc.th.jpg

http://img356.imageshack.us/img356/1927 ... 2vv.th.jpg

http://img224.imageshack.us/img224/7950 ... 3pi.th.jpg

I hope you can see them. Sorry they are so blurry and small. My hair is shorter than that now, about shoulder length.

Images turned to links by LME
Pics need to be linked, rather than embedded

[LICKLELEA]

First things first you do not look about 12!! you look a lot older than I did at your age. I've always had a bit of a baby face and struggled getting in to pubs and clubs (although I tried very hard!!). Now I miss being asked for ID! - it's all about your attitude towards yourself and also your confidence.

Don't be so down on yourself you are very pretty and I can't believe you said you have big thighs!! - at 7.5 stone you can't have (have my little baby bump and you'll know how it feels!!! )

Just be yourself and dress how you want to dress, experiment with colours try something on you would never wear, I bet you'll be suprised. You've got the looks, now get the confidence and strut your stuff, the boys won't know what hit them!

[LME79]

I agree with what people have said above. You are a very pretty girl, you have a very natural look which a lot of people would love to have!

Also, please don't be down about not having held hands with a boy yet. I was 16 when I had my first kiss and, looking back, the timing was just right and I'm not a weirdo now (I'm 25 now).

Good luck with it all hon, PM if you need to xxx

[Danni87]

you are beautiful and you certainly dont look 12! when i looked at those photos i thought you were about 16. You are very pretty and feminine, your so lucky to look the way you do. Youll certainly break a few hearts soon!

[Bexical]

Yep agreed you are certainly pretty and ypur still young, you are changing all the time. As for a boyfriend your only 14 i believe... hteres plenty of time for that, it doesnt mean your not attractive.. i was 17 when i got my first PROPER boyfriend.. i had boyfriends but they werent very nice to me. The thing boys like is when you are yourself i can imagine that if you changed the way you dressed and looked you wouldnt be yourself... boys actually like it when we dont pretend to be someone we are not. You just need more confidence in yourself.!

[too many problems]

Ok, I have started to buy a few more colorful clothes, mostly in purples and reds. (I've been getting most of them second hand or off Ebay because I can't afford many new things) But I have NO IDEA what to get. I don't know what suits me or what's in style, or what to wear to any particular occasion. I know I should just buy things I like but I'm completely clueless. I'm home educated and most of my friends wear strange gothic/hippy clothes so I really don't know what people my age wear! Can anyone give me any advice, or a link to a website? Thanks.

[aimee47]

sorry i can't really offer any practical help.

just wear what you feel comfortable in thats what i do.

[SuperKawaii]

i think you look really lovely in those photos

im really sorry you feel that way, if it would make you feel better i didnt have a boyfriend until i was fourteen, who i have been going out with for a year. i also didnt kiss a boy til then. i much prefered waiting for the right guy to come along than going around and trying loads of guys

well what i can say to you is, from what i can see from the photos all you need is a bit of a confidence boost.
i would suggest getting a new haircut (you dont need one, but it generally makes people feel a lot better about their appearance) or try new ways of styling your hair. as for make up, less is more, often girls who try to make themselves look older using makeup make themselves look terrible by putting on too much foundation/eyeshadow etc. i dont think you should use more make up than your already using.
now clothes, most people have some colours they just feel better wearing, and its ok feeling your not able to wear a miniskirt (i dont think im able to either) but you could maybe try different styles of tops and trousers in those colours, experimenting with lower (but not too low) necklines and tighter/baggier trousers.

hope i helped, but im just trying to help you see that what you already have is just beautiful!
xoxo

oops, just read your other post there about the fashion trends, you could buy a few teen magazines and read up on them! cosmo girl is pretty good

[yessica]

I think you look really pretty!! You certainly don't look 11 or 12! I hadn't had my first boyfriend until I was 16 'cause I wasn't very secure with the way I looked either. I didn't develop properly until I was 15 going on 16 though. I got a figure and started to feel sexy. This will come in time. There are more people than you realise who haven't had boyfriends at this age. Enjoy the freedom of being single while you've got it!

[silver tree]

Hi guys, please note that this topic was started well over a year ago. The problem is likely to have been resolved by now.

[yessica]

Oh ok. I never look at the dates.. maybe I should sorry

[hana.15]

Im sure you are not as bad as you think you are. Everyone can name a lot about them selves that they dont like. If you dont feel comfotable wearing scirts then dont wear them. Try wearing a knew colour, maybe to start off with something similar to purple, like a dark red, and gradually change your colours.

Boys are not important in your life at the momment, they may seem like they are but honestly, they arnt. Try not to go to heavy on the make-up to start off with. Maybe a bit of concellor, (your own skin colour) and some mascara will do it. Wear things you feel comfortable in.

My top outfits are:
boot leg jeans, brown floaty top and brown dolly shoes. With straighted or curly hair
Black jeans, pink sport top, white/black trainers, hair tied back and little make-up
brown combat trousers, white long top, white trainers and straight hair. some make-up

Try theses out,
If you want any more outfits or styles write on here again. x

Hannah x