She needs her own sense of identity!

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She needs her own sense of identity!

Postby PinkEgoBox » Thu Mar 16, 2006 1:03 pm

OK so this is probably going to sound way trivial :o but my sister who is younger always looks for my approval and only buys things she thinks I would wear/like.

This is kinda nice in a way, but im off to uni in sept (fingers crossed!!!) and she needs to get her own sense of identity otherwise she'll be lost without me! Also Id quite like her to be her own person and not like me, as im not so great!

How can I help her do this?

PinkEgoBox x x
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Postby singingsmiler » Thu Mar 16, 2006 1:56 pm

There is nothing wrong with your sister looking up to you. You should be flattered you are obviously a good role model for her.

I wouldn't worry too much about when you go to uni - she will have to learn about being her own person then. But just because she likes to dress like you does not mean she is not her own person.

She looks for your approval because she cares about you and what you think of her. Just make sure that you help her with her self confidence and self esteem and she will be fine.

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SS xx
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Postby Moose » Thu Mar 16, 2006 7:34 pm

Your sister probably will become her own person as she gets older, and you going away to uni may be the making of her!

From now until you go away, when you go shopping together for clothes, give her loads of compliments about the stuff she picks up (even if you don't think it's too great). That should boost her confidence a bit so that she can choose what she likes when you're not there.

You don't say how old she is, but if you can encourage her to go shopping with her friends a bit and share ideas about clothes with them, you may find she doesn't rely on her big sis so much.
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Postby Bexical » Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:48 pm

How old is she if i may ask? I used to do this alot with my older sister but as i grew up i developed my own sense of what i want and how i want to be and funnily enough even though i copied her many times i am a totally different person to her, as you leave just let her know a few things like your always there if she needs you as if she looks up to you so much then you leaving for uni will hit her like a tonne of bricks. This will also be good for you as you get to be independant and you can be your own person as well.
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Postby PinkEgoBox » Sun Mar 19, 2006 8:55 pm

Shes only 13,

Thats good advice ty :D

And ty for the hugs SS!!

xxx
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Postby N i k k i » Tue Mar 21, 2006 12:37 am

Next time she asks you what you think of something, turn the question around and say ' well what do you think about it' and then her real personality will come out and she should start to decide for herself.
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