Another black sheep . . . . . . or should that be pink ?

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Another black sheep . . . . . . or should that be pink ?

Postby pink princess76 » Sun Jan 06, 2008 2:07 pm

In October 2007 myself, my partner, my sister and brother in law all went on holiday together. During the holiday my sister was a nightmare, refusing to do anything or go anywhere, and sat there for the whole two weeks with a sour face. Although nothing was said it was obvious that they were annoyed with us, but why we are unsure. We think it was possibly because they were not having a good time, but if you refuse to join in the fun, then that will happen!!
When we arrived back in the uk they left without saying bye. My sister has obviously been making up stories to tell my parents as they are barely civil when my partner and I see them now. The latest thing being that my sister insists she has sent text messages to me asking to meet, if she can come over etc. One lost text message I can understand but six? When I text my sister ignores them, except if there is something in it that will benefit her. Boxing day we were all 'invited' round to my sister's house even though it was blatently obvious that we were not welcome, and during the whole day my sister said barely one word to us.
I don't understand why she is doing this? If she wants my parents total attention then she is welcome to it ( there is another story there!!I will post this later) but I just wish they would be honest and if there was something we did to offend them they would have the guts to let us know.
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Postby HappyGoLucky » Sun Jan 06, 2008 3:18 pm

Hi pink princess76. Welcome to PP. :)

She sounds like she's very selfish, from what I read here. It's not your fault if she didn't join in! Maybe you could try talking to your sister in private? I'm not sure if asking her will work but maybe you could give it a try?
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Postby pink princess76 » Sun Jan 06, 2008 3:27 pm

Thank you for replying so quickly.
My sister has always been selfish, and always allowed to get away with it which is what makes her worse. I think I will try and talk to her sometime but need to let the dust settle first I am still very angry but hurt also.
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Postby HappyGoLucky » Sun Jan 06, 2008 3:43 pm

I would feel angry and hurt too if I was in your position! Let us know what happens.

Good Luck.
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Postby snail » Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:09 pm

HappyGoLucky's right I think - it's usually easiest to get these things out in the open. If you think either your sister or your parents are unhappy about something, just say to them when you next speak privately "You seem annoyed with me, have I done anything to offend you?"

This forces them to either speak their mind, or, if they say you've done nothing wrong, to stop behaving as though you have. Just bite the bullet and say it.
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Re: Another black sheep . . . . . . or should that be pink ?

Postby retrochav » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:04 pm

You mention the word "pink" and i am unsure whether this is a metaphor for you being gay, or if it is a part of your username?

Anyhow, i would go to the nub of the problem and ask your sister what is going wrong between you. If she says "nothing" tell her how you feel, and advise her that you want to know if you have offended her. Be prepared to listen and not judge - what you think is stupid could be really hurting her.

If all else fails, ask your parrents. Being the more mature one of the two could pay dividends.
whatever your problem someone else has been there and bears the scars.
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Another black sheep . . . . . . or should that be pink ?

Postby pink princess76 » Mon Jan 07, 2008 11:22 am

The pink thing does come from my username but it also does relate to the gay thing.
I tried to call my sister last night and text her also but she has ignored them all!! So much for talking to her.

Will keep ypu posted re situation though.
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Postby HappyGoLucky » Mon Jan 07, 2008 11:59 am

Can you meet up with her at some place and talk to her face to face then?
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Another black sheep . . . . . . or should that be pink ?

Postby pink princess76 » Mon Jan 07, 2008 1:06 pm

it's trying to get hold of her in the first place that is the problem. She has caller id so will not ansa if it a number she doesn't know or my number and won't reply to my texts!! I live about 30 miles away so can't just pop round on the off chance she is there. I am going to keep trying but right now it seems like I am doing all the work!!
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Postby Bel Bel » Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:54 pm

If you still have trouble getting through you could write her a short note
asking her to call you as your having trouble getting through to her
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Postby millwallbird » Fri Jan 18, 2008 11:07 pm

hi ya hunni i think u should just leave things for a while and give things a chance to settle as it is obviously doin no good to keep phonin her and textin her and u sound like u r becomin more and more frustrated so let things go 4 a while x give her a chance 2 miss u a bit and she may come round..... u can not change people or their behaviour but u can change yr reactions to it xxxx gd luck hunni xxx
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Postby HappyGoLucky » Sat Jan 19, 2008 3:44 am

How annoying! Is she living with someone else you know? You could call that other person and ask the person to pass the phone to your sister. That way you could talk to her! Or, call her house phone and see if she answers that.
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Postby pink princess76 » Sat Jan 19, 2008 2:36 pm

She lives with my brother in law. Again he does not answer when he sees my number!! I have tried again to make contact since my last post but no joy. Think I will leave it a while.

Millwallbird - I liked that bit where you say you can't change people but you can change your reactions to them - a great bit of advice !!
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Postby millwallbird » Tue Jan 22, 2008 9:54 pm

Thanx hunni its so very true x
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