Baby Jealousy

Maybe you have fallen out with your mate, or perhaps you are about to betray them - whatever it is, talk about it here.
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Baby Jealousy

Postby Vesper90 » Fri Feb 27, 2009 9:04 pm

This is going sound terrible. For the past couple of months Ive had a great deal of trouble with my period and the morning after pill. My period was late twice after I took the MAP last Dec so I went to the doctors to get checked out. I felt different, bit of nausea and tiredness but nothing serious so I had a very sneaky feeling but thankfully/sadly it was negative. I was excited at the time, but also terrified so I dont know how I should of felt about it.

And today, I was at work and one of my friends/fellow studentmates came over and whispered in my ear, "Im pregnant" and gave me a cheeky smile and walked off. Of course, I was delighted for her. Shes 21 and happily married and has wanted to become pregnant for a while but it means now she has to drop her course and leave for a year which isnt brilliant tbh. At the same time though, I feel so jealous of her. I know, its awful but the problem is I dont understand why I feel jealous. Im only 19 and not ready for marriage/baby/family but a part of me really wanted to be pregnant last week and now she is and shes married to the love of her life. I know I have all the time in the world but I guess Im trying to rush things. She just seems so happy now, and has every right to be and she'll be even happier when the little one comes along. I just dont understand why Im so jealous. I hope people understand where Im coming from. Has anyone been in the same situation? Why I am I being like this?
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Re: Baby Jealousy

Postby rufio89 » Mon Mar 02, 2009 9:47 am

It's natural to get broody sometimes, I know I do!

But just try to think about it logically.

You're young, surely theres things you want to do with your life? I mean your a student, so presumably you're studying towards something, and with a baby that would have to go on hold for YEARS. you wouldnt be able to go out, you'd be constantly broke, you'd be sleep-deprived, and then you'll have a child who will need at least 5 years of pretty much constant care. It's easy to think about how nice it would be to have a baby but when you feel like that, just try to think about the logistics of the situation. It would 100% change your life, and you've got PLENTY of time for that down the road, when you're older, with a steady job and steady relationship.

All the people I know who are young Mums love their kids very much, but most of them, if they could go back, would wait another 5-10 years before having kids.
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Re: Baby Jealousy

Postby dipsydoodlenoodle » Mon Mar 02, 2009 10:07 am

I agree with Ruth; I'd also like to add that you see your friend in her "perfect" life and then you wish you were her or in similar situations. It's natural when you see someone who's life is perfect and they are 100% happy to want to be in their situation and experience their things.
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Re: Baby Jealousy

Postby snail » Mon Mar 02, 2009 11:51 am

I'd also like to add that I doubt your friend's life IS perfect, however she might represent it. Children are wonderful, but you should only plan to have them when you have done the things you wanted to with your own life - for everyone's sake. You say that she's going to have to drop her course and leave, so that doesn't sound ideal. Has she really been trying to get pregnant, or is that what she's saying now? At 21 she can't have had much time to do anything with her life (travelling, living abroad etc) and now she can't. She won't get her independence back now until she's in her 40s. That definitely isn't perfect.
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