I think I am a horrible person for not saying hello :'[

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I think I am a horrible person for not saying hello :'[

Postby emotionalwreck_ » Sat Mar 14, 2009 12:16 am

heya everyone. :)
I have a problem which I cannot get over, that involves me feeling unhappy and have headaches for thinking over this too much. There are these people that I talk to but I'm not that close to them, and they are also friends with my close friends that I hang around with. Well the thing is that whenever I see them I alwayssuddenly without thinking twice just walk off and not even say hello or smile at them. I even sometimes just swiftly turn my head to the over side so that I pretend that I haven't seen them. I always go in a different direction to where I know that they will be, because I want to try and avoid them. The other day I saw them and they saw me and I swiftly turned my head to the other side and stalked off! I felt terrible for doing that. And my close friends always wants to hang around with them so I always can't face them properly as it feels awkward. So they know that I purposely don't say hi and so I know they have noticed this because this has happened on several occasions where I see them and don't say hi. It's not that I don't like them it's just that I don't like to say hello to them. I mean, I like to say hello of course everyone does because I don't seem to have a problem with saying hello to my close friends and my other friends that I'm also not as close with, but I don't know why suddenly I just want to avoid any contact of greeting these group of people. They haven't done anything wrong to me, I think maybe it's because I don't talk to one the people in that group so I feel that I shouldn't say hello because I don't talk to them.They probably talk about me behind my back because I don't say hi. I want them to like me, so I try and make an effort to say hello again and wave and smile and be as friendly and nice, like the same girl they first liked before she started not saying hi to them. They do still talk to me but I know that deep down that they tlak about me or they don't really like me anymore because of this. Becuase whenever I say hi to them they only just merely smile a small smile with not much effort, I mean I don't blame them for not liking me anymore and talking about me behind my back becasue I do deserve it after all. I also notice that they don't say hi to me anymore, I always have to be the one to start the conversation first because it's all quiet when I arrive at the scene. Well, it would be quiet anyway, becuase I am quite quiet and shy. I don't know what to do, I've tried my best to say hello to them, and be their friend but they don't like me anymore. I feel really upset and unhappy and I have such a headache because this all I keep worrying about. I know that I was the one who started it all for not saying hi in the first place and I deserve it but please help advise me.
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Re: I think I am a horrible person for not saying hello :'[

Postby dipsydoodlenoodle » Mon Mar 16, 2009 10:47 am

Just say hi and wave, how are you? Then make up excuses that you are meeting someone or have to be somewhere and leave. At least you are being socialbe and saying hello.

If you don't "feel like saying hello" then you will eventually end up being very lonely.
A hug is a great gift, one size fits all.
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Re: I think I am a horrible person for not saying hello :'[

Postby miaow » Mon Mar 16, 2009 10:44 pm

I think this has probably gone into a downward spiral, ie you've not said hello, they think your being rude, you then think they're talking about you, so when you next see them you don't say hello again, they think your being rude again and so on...

As dipsy said - Just smile say hello and carry on walking. Are you maybe getting nervous about saying hello incase you think you have to stop and have a full blown indepth conversation with them and you don't know what to say? Again, as dipsy said - say hello and carry on walking, if they stop to chat can just be usually chatty jargon - hi how are you, what've you been up to, then close conversation - must dash got blar blar to get to or meeting so and so and I'm late - see you later bye....

If you and this group have mutual close mates you'll probably end up getting to know them better and may find you get on with them, worth a try. If not is nothing wrong with saying hello...
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Re: I think I am a horrible person for not saying hello :'[

Postby Bel Bel » Wed Mar 18, 2009 3:36 pm

It's common courtesy to great someone you know when you see them so i would think you were rude if you did that to me
I agree with others just say hello, you don't have to get it major conversations if you don't want to
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