I don't understand her...

Maybe you have fallen out with your mate, or perhaps you are about to betray them - whatever it is, talk about it here.
Forum rules

I don't understand her...

Postby JennaXXX » Thu Aug 20, 2009 6:41 pm

I have a colleague who acts very strangely towards me. She tells everyone how much she adores me, how fantastic I am at my job and couldn't be any sweeter to my face. Yet often she acts in ways that really make me question her. She lied to me about being offered my job and has lied about numerous things in the past, Is a complete control freak and although she doesn't work in my department anymore, she still tries to muscle her way in and acts as though she is boss of the place where I work even though I am. She also pretends that she doesn't know important information that I have passed onto her which has got me in trouble at work in the past and she also ignores me at times.
Not only this but I still have to work with her at times and she is absolutely awful at the job. She is incredibly lazy, takes incredible amounts of sick leave and keeps walking off when she is meant to be working.
Whenever I am around her, I feel incredibly threatened. Even if she is just standing there and not saying anything to me. It is like a gut instinct thing telling me to be careful. Other colleagues have also said to me to be careful around her and that she is full of herself.

Problem is I just don't understand how she can be so lovely to me yet do all these sly and cunning things behind my back. People have said that it is just because she is jealous and maybe she is..but then why be nice to my face?

I don't get people at times. :-?
Whatever life throws at you, smile, hold your head up high and be the best you can possibly be.
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
Posts: 1021
Joined: Tue Jan 18, 2005 11:51 am
Location: England

Re: I don't understand her...

Postby captainf » Thu Aug 20, 2009 8:05 pm

Is this your friend with the kids you like alot, or is this someone else?

I think that if she is making life difficult like not passing information on and therefore getting you into trouble you definitely cant sit back.
When you have to pass info on to her, isnt there anyone higher that you can pass the info on to instead? Also cant you have a word with her boss and say that she isnt really doing her job properly? Afterall she shouldnt have the job if she cannot do it.

When dealing with people like her I find its better to have as little to do with her as possible. So only talk to her when you really have to! You have no reason to feel intimidated around her - you're good at your job, she doesnt sound too good at hers.

I dont know why shes nice to you but then sly. I guess that may say alot about her character. So do you feel you can trust her or do you feel that shes a fake?
Remember how the runway lights looked one night long ago when you were lost and found your way, and how-you still dont know?
User avatar
Long Term Lodger
Long Term Lodger
Posts: 4763
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2003 6:28 pm
Location: Milton Keynes
Gender: Male

Re: I don't understand her...

Postby dipsydoodlenoodle » Fri Aug 21, 2009 8:35 am

I would have said she is jealous. Next time you have information to pass on to her, try and get another member of staff present or resort to writing it down and making her sign it - i.e. you take one copy and she takes the other, that way if she denies it or "looses" the paper, you have yours with her signature on it.
A hug is a great gift, one size fits all.
User avatar
Long Term Lodger
Long Term Lodger
Posts: 3928
Joined: Fri Feb 08, 2008 4:24 pm
Location: England
Gender: Female

Re: I don't understand her...

Postby Bel Bel » Fri Aug 21, 2009 11:17 am

I would say she is sucking upto you to try and keep you sweet - she is not nice at all
From now on create a log and when you pass info to her ask her to sign the log to say she has received it
Do it for everyone and not just her and she can't accuse you of singling her out
Or send the info by email so you have proof you sent it
As for her muscling in when she tries to do it next time say I appreciate your input but I need to run MY department the way thats right for me - you will only need to do this once or twice for her to get the message
Don't let her walk all over you and she will stop doing it
Life is for living so live it to the fullest

Cheap Pandora Charms UK

User avatar
Bel Bel
Fully Fledged Flatmate
Fully Fledged Flatmate
Posts: 6758
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 1:58 pm
Location: Hertfordshire
Gender: Female

Return to Friends

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest