Little bit creepy...

[rufio89]

Ok... am I wrong or is this a little bit creepy?

I went out with this guy when I was about 15/16. We went out for a few months.
We split up and have been friends intermittantly but he's always seemed to have had trouble letting go (even though he split up with me).

Anyway, in the end I just started ignoring him. It's now been 6 months since I replied to a single message or email or phonecall.


Last night I got a photomessage from him, saying "my wall... i hope youre good". And it was a photo of his wall, and on it, was a picture I'd drawn when I was 16, for him. Only on the picture he'd written "Ruth drew this!!"

creepy???

[dipsydoodlenoodle]

definately creepy.

[RagDoll]

That's a little bit strange. I've a similar-ish one to this actually - I went out with someone when I was 16-17 (bearing in mind I am 24 now) and I noticed on one of his relatively recent photos of him in his army bedroom, he has a photo of me that I'd given him when I was 16-17 stuck to his wall!

[Skarlet]

Definitely weird.

[snail]

I think sometimes guys like to keep trophies to remind themselves that they managed to get a desirable girl, even if there isn't any real connection any more, or any great memories, and even if they decided not to keep her! How many women a young man has managed to persuade to date him can often be a big pride thing.

Constantly wanting to talk and email though, suggests this guy is hoping the relationship will re-start at some point.

[captainf]

I dont agree that its a trophy thing.
Although I have to say that although i'm over my ex (Tamsin) sometimes I do think of her. Not in a weird way, just, she was the only girl who truely made me happy. I shared some really nice memories with her. Shes very happy with someone else now and thats great, im very happy for her because she has a very good heart. However the point im making is that maybe your ex sees you as the one girl who truely made him happy, sadly it doesnt sound like he is over you and maybe he does hope that you will like him back.

[rufio89]

Oh I KNOW he still likes me, he told me.

He said "he's never stopped loving me", but we were together when I was 15, so to be honest, I'm skeptical of what his idea of love is. I might not be popular saying this, but I think unrequited love for 5 years, is not "love", just obsession.

I made it perfectly clear how I felt and that nothing was ever going to happen, but he just wont leave me alone. I started telling him to leave me alone then I decided it was best to just ignore him. The messages have been gradually slowing down, so I think it's working, just taking some time.


I dont think it's that weird that he kept the picture, I have some stuff from exes in my memory box. I do think it's a bit weird that he has it on his wall, but the bit I thought was super-weird was the "Ruth drew this!" thing... plus sending me the picture??

hm. I find it slightly frightening.

[Skarlet]

I didn't think keeping it was weird, having it on his wall, and sending a picture of it to you was what I thought was weird. Keeping things from exes is fine and normal, its part of your history so of course you will want to keep it.

[captainf]

Its only obsession if they keep on at you even when somethings not going to happen. Its possible to love someone for a long time and not tell them, thats not obsessive.
Your ex sounds very hung up on you (so slightly obsessive) which is a shame because everyone deserves happiness and hopefully he will find a girl who makes him happy.