My housemate bitched about me

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My housemate bitched about me

Postby Moxy1 » Sun Feb 20, 2011 11:02 am

Hi everyone,

Last night I overheard my housemate talking about me behind my back and I'm feeling pretty rubbish.

We met in December last year and moved to London together, as we were both doing a fast track postgrad course. We got on pretty well, going for dinner and shopping together when we have time.

The problem is I tend to get too drunk on nights out. I realise this is not good, and I am going to stop drinking. It is a very intense course, and I've been using drink as a way to let off steam.

Anyway, on Friday everybody from the course went out and I drank too much. In the morning my housemate told me she was annoyed but not to worry about it, just to not do it again. So I apologised and told her I'm going to stop, and bought her some chocolate as a gesture to show I'm sorry. She said it was really sweet and gave me a hug, so I thought all was forgiven.

Then later on her friend came round, and I was on my way to the bathroom, which I have to walk past her room to get to. I could hear her saying (not particularly quietly) that I'm like a child and she feels like she's my Mum. She is 28 and I am 22, so there is a bit of an age gap but I don't think I am immature, other than my bad drinking habits. Then more of her friends came round and she didn't invite me to hang out with them so I decided to give her some space and just stayed in my room.

She has been struggling on the course as there are a lot of big personalities and everybody battles for attention all the time, and she feels that her work isn't as good everyone else. So I imagine stress has something to do with it. I can understand her being annoyed, but I feel really hurt she thinks that of me.

I'm not sure whether to confront her or not.
Moxy1
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Re: My housemate bitched about me

Postby dayle » Wed Feb 23, 2011 2:18 pm

She probably needed to let off steam with her friends - sometimes you do focus on the worst rather than the best and she probably thought it was better to let her anger and frustration show in front of them rather than you. To be honest, I'd feel frustrated if at 28 I'd been living with someone who was living the undergraduate student life-style while I was trying hard on a course and struggling myself. It may well feel like she's your mum.

After a certain point, sorry doesn't mean much unless someone also changes their behaviour. If you want to sort your relationship with her out, you need to reduce your drinking. You could also let her know you've heard and tell her what you plan to change.
dayle
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Re: My housemate bitched about me

Postby Jonaslove » Fri Feb 25, 2011 1:55 am

I think it might be a good idea for you to just tell her you overheard and just tell her again that you are sorry. If you talk to her about it you can get it solved and out of the way and will hopefully feel better about the situation and get your friendship back on track.

About drinking too much - try not to worry, everyone does it at some point! Just try to slow down a bit a reduce the amount that you drink and hopefully things will get better and you wont catch her witching about you again!

Hope the situation gets solved! x
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