...never gonna meet anyone

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...never gonna meet anyone

Postby tomboii24 » Fri Jul 01, 2011 2:15 am

so here goes...
im a 24 y/o gay female, i have a rubbish job, live in a rubbish town and my house is falling down around me!
lately, when im deep in thought, i have the most horrible feeling that im gonna grow old alone, its never really bothered me before but i think now im getting older im worried about how restricted my life is, its not so much being in a relationship as it is a need to meet new people.
dont get me wrong im not a loner, in fact im quite popular, but i think im always going to fall into the dreaded 'friend' category...i feel i should be going on dates and stuff but i just never meet anybody new.
im quite shy so when finances and shift patterns actually allow me to venture out, i get nowhere anyway because i stand in a corner with my straight friends, im trying to lose weight to make me look better so other people will approach me, but why will they, i genuinely feel like i have nothing to offer.

sorry, i rambled on a bit more than i intended to...ooops :D
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Re: ...never gonna meet anyone

Postby ILoveChristmas » Mon Jul 04, 2011 4:04 pm

My feeling is that you should forget dating and meeting someone new for the time being and concentrate on feeling better about yourself and your home environment.

At 24 you're very young to be worrying that you'll grow old alone, too young in fact, so try not to think that way. Especially in this day and age when careers matter more to people, meeting partners is taking a back seat. Consequently people are much older when they settle down than they once were.

It's also true to say that the way people meet is changing. Internet dating and similar sites make it much easier for people to access like-minded people. If you're relatively shy and not terribly confident about your appearance then it provides a buffer between you and the people you meet. You avoid the awkward silences and desperate search for something to say by taking your time and composing your correspondence at home. Then, once you do meet, you have a sufficient bank of knowledge about a person to hold a decent conversation with them.

I believe that the harder you look for happiness the less likely you are to find it. Inevitably people concentrate on what's wrong rather than what's right. Relax. Learn to feel better about yourself, whether that's continuing to lose weight or training to look for a better job, then concern yourself with meeting someone.
Christmas to a child is the first terrible proof that to travel hopefully is better than to arrive. - Stephen Fry.

The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel. — Steve Furtick
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Re: ...never gonna meet anyone

Postby tomboii24 » Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:10 am

Thankyou for your reply..I know im still young, and yes i think my main issue is with myself, its more frustration than anything haha, dont get me wrong, im not desperate to meet someone or even looking, im just worried that nobody looks at me in that way.
i was out the other night and my friend was telling me to approach people otherwise i will never find a girlfriend haha, i dont respond well to pressure, but she is the type that thinks her life is pointless without a boyfriend and she doesnt understand why i enjoy being single, to be honest though, i dont get why she wants to settle down so young lol
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