Uncle has secret son

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Uncle has secret son

Postby anonymous123 » Sun Jul 24, 2011 4:23 am

Hello, my uncle has a secret son and it cuts me up not letting my cousins know about this, as i think they deserve the right to know, i know i'll only be opening a can of worms by confronting him/or telling my cousins, and ii know it isn't my business. but it really tears me up knowing they have a brother they've not been given the chance to know. Thank you - Anony
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Re: Uncle has secret son

Postby Ticktock » Sun Jul 24, 2011 9:30 am

You ever heard the phrase "shoot the messenger", applies to you very well. You interfere and everyone will blame you, at least initially.

The best way to approach this is directly with your uncle, find out his reasons, they may be good ones, and try and persuade him that the secret child is not at fault for what the uncle has chosen to do and should know his family.

If he still chooses to keep that secret well at least you tried and time may well change his mind as the reasons for secrecy become less important.
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Re: Uncle has secret son

Postby Bel Bel » Tue Jul 26, 2011 4:41 pm

Ask your uncle what he thinks will happen at his funeral and does he really want this to be the way everyone finds out

I agree with Ticktock the messenger generally gets shot
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Re: Uncle has secret son

Postby anonymous123 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:48 am

He would probably disown me if i confronted him about it, and it would cause a ripple affect because, my nan told my mum, my mum told me, so nobody is supposed to know. and then he will find out my nan has told people, and it will cause bigger jelly
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Re: Uncle has secret son

Postby Bel Bel » Wed Jul 27, 2011 9:50 am

Then you should just leave it
It's not your responsibility to tell and you can always deny you ever knew, probably the best option.
You don't actually know it's definately true either just because your Nan thinks it doesn't actually make it true.
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Re: Uncle has secret son

Postby Ticktock » Mon Aug 29, 2011 11:14 pm

I am presuming this is all your mum's side of the family, so you uncle is your mum's brother, and you gran is their mum, so she is likely to know.

My gran went through a phase of worrying towards the end of her life, mainly about the family falling out over my uncle getting the house because he had spent his life looking after her. Your gran may worry as well about her missing grandchild and be hoping in telling your mum that she can get your uncle to resolve this gap in your family.

Go talk to your gran and find out the full story, even if you can't do anything at least she will have the comfort of knowing one of the young people in the family knows about this secret, and one day when you are older and a bit less intimidated by your uncle be able to resolve it.

Just a tip, if you can get the name and address of the mother of the missing child out of your gran, even if it is years out of date, the internet is a wonderful thing and you may be able to track down your missing relative without your uncle... something your gran would never consider!
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