Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say something

Got a problem with your workplace or one of your colleagues? Thrash it out here.
Forum rules
NEW USERS HAVE TO WAIT FOR THEIR FIRST POSTS TO BE APPROVED BY AN ADMINISTRATOR. Rules | Essential Information | FAQ | Support | Twitter

Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say something

Postby Catnip1000 » Mon Dec 19, 2011 7:48 pm

Dear all, I'm new to here and just wanted to see if I could get any advice for a problem at work.
Well, a girl who used to work in my office told me last Xmas that something had gone on between her and a guy in our office. The guy is married so she said it had finished but she still had feelings for him. She asked me not to say anything. She left our office in may and the guy left soon after. Nothing more was really said about it but there were rumours already going round about them (not started by me I hasten to add) people were seeing they'd been seen kissing and were being over friendly. Anyway, someone new started in our office in sept. when we were alone one day he asked me what's this about that girl messing about with the married guy. He said he'd heard rumours. I said that I knew she liked him and something might have gone on but I didn't know. Anyway a week ago the person I spoke to said he'd blurted out to the girl on a night out about her shagging the married guy andhe said she admitted it to him. I saw her before I knew this had happened and she ignored me, she has also ignored an email that I sent her about a work related matter. It didn't dawn on me at the time but now I'm realising that she obviously thinks i've told him. I don't know how to approach her about this now. I feel awkward about it but don't want any bad feeling. I think I'm probably the only person that she told in so many words but I don't think she realises that it wasn't really a secret because other people were speculating and gossiping. Any ideas? Thanks in advance
Catnip1000
Just Landed
Just Landed
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2011 7:00 pm
Gender: Female

Re: Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say somethi

Postby Vix1 » Tue Dec 20, 2011 7:06 am

From what you have said it doesnt sound like this girl is a close friend of yours and is merely an ex work colleague. If this is the case then I wouldnt loose any sleep over it. People will always make their own minds up anyway so even if you do say something to her she may not believe you.
Vix1
Regular Visitor
Regular Visitor
 
Posts: 30
Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2011 8:45 am
Gender: Female

Re: Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say somethi

Postby highlandcow » Tue Dec 20, 2011 11:31 am

I agree with Vix, try not to be too worked up over it. It sounds like she's just looking for someone to blame but if everyone was sounding off about it then it's hardly your fault.
Let it blow over, people always find something else to gossip about especially in the workplace. This will all be history soon enough.
Go to Glasgow at least once in your life and have a roll and square sliced sausage and a cup of tea. When you feel the tea coursing over your spice-singed tongue, you'll know what I mean when I say:
'It's good to be alive!'"

- Billy Connolly
User avatar
highlandcow
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
 
Posts: 1008
Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2008 9:22 pm
Location: Glasgow, Scotland
Gender: Female

Re: Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say somethi

Postby Catnip1000 » Tue Dec 20, 2011 7:01 pm

Thanks guys, I do have to see her sometimes through work and have socialised with her since she left our office. She's not a close friend and we don't speak really unless we see each other but don't want to feel awkward if I do see her.
Catnip1000
Just Landed
Just Landed
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2011 7:00 pm
Gender: Female

Re: Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say somethi

Postby captainf » Tue Dec 20, 2011 10:24 pm

Dont worry about it. You've got nothing to feel guilty about really. She decided to go for a married man and they had their affair which obviously was in plain view of colleagues otherwise they wouldn't of been speculating. Overall its her own fault it came out - he cheated, she got involved with a married man, the potential was for it to be messy and they werent discreet and therefore were found out. She should be annoyed with herself really, not anyone else.
Remember how the runway lights looked one night long ago when you were lost and found your way, and how-you still dont know?
User avatar
captainf
Long Term Lodger
Long Term Lodger
 
Posts: 4763
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2003 6:28 pm
Location: Milton Keynes
Gender: Male

Re: Feel awkward and don't know whether I should say somethi

Postby highlandcow » Tue Dec 20, 2011 11:09 pm

I reckon that's probably why her nose is bent out of shape about it; she's projecting her guilt over her actions onto you.
Yeah it sucks when someone ignores you but you're not the bad guy here!
Go to Glasgow at least once in your life and have a roll and square sliced sausage and a cup of tea. When you feel the tea coursing over your spice-singed tongue, you'll know what I mean when I say:
'It's good to be alive!'"

- Billy Connolly
User avatar
highlandcow
Permanent Fixture
Permanent Fixture
 
Posts: 1008
Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2008 9:22 pm
Location: Glasgow, Scotland
Gender: Female


Return to Work & Colleagues

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron