Bulimia?

[Tillymint]

I don't really know if this is the right section, I guess it kind of is cos I struggle with how I see myself.

I was a size 22 for a long time, and when I left my ex I started losing weight. Eventually I got down to a size 14 mostly through a healthy diet but occasionally purging if I felt I had eaten particularly bad that day. I've had 2 babies in the last 2 years and I'm now a size 12. But the being sick has got out of hand, I've been being sick 3-4 times each day for the last 3 years. I eat ridiculous amounts of food in secret, my husband doesn't realise the full extent of it and I don't know how to break the cycle.

I look at myself and all I see is fat, I know logically that I'm not hugely overweight or anything, but I do think that I am overweight, and that I still need to lose more. People keep telling me I'm slim enough but I don't see what they're seeing. I took these pictures this week, and I don't think they look like what I look like in real life if that makes sense?





I'm tired of being sick, having bad skin, wasting so much money on food just to purge it all again. But I don't know how to stop.

[rufio89]

You need professional help. We can offer you support but this is a serious problem beyond the capacity of any of the posters here.

For what it's worth - no, I dont think you need to lose any more weight. BUT, that's not the point. Even if you were 20 stone overweight, making yourself sick is NOT the way to lose weight! It's a form of self harm and it's likely to have much deeper roots than just a desire to be thin.

Please, please go and see your doctor.

[Bel Bel]

Agree with Rufio on this
It isn't a healthy way to be for your children. Get help for their sakes.
At some point the kids will pick up on what you are doing and it is not good for them to think that's normal

[Tillymint]

Yeah my oldest (he's 8 ) is already suss about it. It was okay when I was pregnant cos I just said that made me sick but now I have no excuse! I never really thought of it as a form of self harm, guess that kind of makes sense though cos I used to cut myself and it's gradually been replaced with the being sick.

I know long term I can't carry on, 3 years is bad enough as it is and as vain as it sounds, I'm terrified of getting bad teeth or them all falling out (I have tons of nightmares about it).

I don't really know how the doctor can help, and I wouldn't even know what to say when going to see her. I've had counselling for my self harm a couple of years ago and we touched on the being sick then as it was happening occasionally at that point but it was never fully addressed.

[rufio89]

You should talk to your doctor and tell them that you have bulimia and they should be able to refer you to a counsellor that specialises in eating disorders.

[Bel Bel]

If you can't speak print and take this post with you and show him