He thinks he can tell me what to do.

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He thinks he can tell me what to do.

Postby X_Smiler_X » Tue Apr 01, 2003 9:28 pm

I have this "friend" who I have known for approximately 9 years - I dont particualy like him to be honest, as he back chats me to other people, and then is nice to my face.
Anyway, if I do something he doesn't like, or if I say something he doesn't want to hear, he will go off on one, calling me all the names under the sun.
He even told me to "Rot in hell" the other week because I wouldn't go out with his friend he tryed to hook me up with. I explained to him I'm not interested, and he said that to me.
I'm getting just a tad aggrivated with him, as I lead my own life - No one leads it for me, but he seems to think he can.
Help! :(
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Postby Kit » Tue Apr 01, 2003 11:45 pm

Hi,

Have you tried telling him how he makes you feel? I know it may seem like a silly question, sorry. Next time he has a go at you, for no reason, just ask him, who does he think he's talking to?

At the end of the day, you are your own person (is that the saying? lol) and if he really thinks of himself as a friend, he should realise that he can't go round treating you the way he does. Friends are there to lend there support, not to criticise and put you down.

Tell him, if he can't be polite, then you don't want him as a friend. Maybe then he'll realise what he's going to lose.

Hope this helps, let me know how you get on.
Kit :D
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Postby X_Smiler_X » Wed Apr 02, 2003 3:29 pm

Thanks for your advice, Kit.
I have told him many of times how it makes me feel, but he just doesn't listen to me - he ends up being immature and telling everyone else how much of a cow etc I am - Even though I have done nothing wrong at all, except show my feelings. Is there a law in doing that? :(
Thank you for your advice though
Luv Smiler xxx
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Postby Shotta » Sat Apr 05, 2003 4:44 pm

I've noticed that you seem to post a lot of problems concerning what your friends have done to you and it always seems to be their fault. Did you ever think that you might actually be the one causing these problems? I don't mean to sound rude there but you do have an awful lot of problems with your friends so it was merely a new way of looking at things.
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Postby Enigma » Sat Apr 05, 2003 8:00 pm

Shotta, I'd like to see the logic that has lead you to make your post. In this topic X_Smiler_X has described how the friend is doing and saying things. The focus there being on what the friend is doing and saying...?
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Postby X_Smiler_X » Mon Apr 07, 2003 10:09 am

Thank you for making me feel a whole lot better Shotta. I have turned to Problem Pages because I needed advice over certain things - I didn't turn to Problem pages to feel as though it's me causing the problems.
It's not me causing the problems, if It was me, then why do you think I'm seeking advice on here???

Thank you by the way Enigma :D
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Postby jasperlens » Sat Aug 02, 2003 6:51 pm

Hello there X SMILER X,
I`ve only just read your problem but almost the same situation happened to me a few years ago. It sounds like this person is lonely and wants to rule your life so that you will feel you owe them. He `backchats` to other people about you to give him `power` over you and he has something over you.
Listen very carefully, do what you want to. Live your life the way YOU want to. This person is to be pitied. You are worth so much more than that. When he `backchats` you , he is showing himself up.
YOU ARE NOT HIS PROPERTY.
Take care and best wishes,
sorry it`s a few months after your posting.
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